May 24th, 2010 01:34 AM
The voice of reason "how hard it can be"
I'm not going to go into great detail but this involves a young man that is 26 years of age. He has potential to make his life better and I'm doing the best I can to help him out but at times I want to grasp him by the throat and slam him against a wall.
I'm trying to help him out and tomorrow we are going to have a talk. If he wants to make his life better I will continue to help him as I know how hard life can be but if he chooses to ignore my advice I feel I need to cut ties. I don't want to see him go down any further than he has and I'm hoping he will listen to me.
May 24th, 2010 03:45 AM
You can lead them to water....
Just be a good example for him and hope he follows it. That's all you can do. "Banging his head against a wall" might feel good in the short term, but usually delivers the opposite of what one hopes for.
"Life's tough......It's even tougher if you're stupid." -John Wayne
May 24th, 2010 10:56 AM
You may need to cut ties, without cutting ties (don't make it official). I've found that if you give someone an 'ultimatum' they usually choose to oppose you or make a false commitment to change. In either case, it severs the relationship.
If you let them know who you are, what you are, and why you are, you may drift apart for a time, but if they do desire change later on the door is still open and you can 'drift' back together again.
I don't know your exact situation or relationship with the youngster. This advice may not apply.
May 24th, 2010 11:04 AM
Then hold their head under water until they listen
Originally Posted by san antone rr
May 24th, 2010 12:33 PM
My nephew was the same way. You can tell them, coach them, lead them...but in the end, THEY have to determine if they want to learn the lesson you are trying to impart.
More often than not, they learn by bleeding....literally or figuratively.
I talked to my nephew yesterday....and at the end of an hour long conversation via Skype, he said he wished he listened to me, went to college and joined the military as an officer. I told him there are some lessons you won't learn in college...so take that experience and apply it as best he can. Thus, learning by bleeding.
- know the difference
is a fancy name for crappy fighter
You have never lived until you have almost died. For those that have fought for it, life has a special flavor the protected will never know
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