Just need to brag a minute...

This is a discussion on Just need to brag a minute... within the Bob & Terry's Place forums, part of the The Back Porch category; You know, the saying "Parenting is the hardest job you'll ever love" is deeply and awesomely true. I just had the following text exchange with ...

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Thread: Just need to brag a minute...

  1. #1
    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Just need to brag a minute...

    You know, the saying "Parenting is the hardest job you'll ever love" is deeply and awesomely true.

    I just had the following text exchange with my daughter (age 19). (unnecessary stuff removed)

    DD: [is taking 4 summer classes, and signing up for fall semester] "I want to get [college] over with as soon as possible. I don't want to be stuck in classes at 27."

    Me: [chuckles because I graduated at age 29] "Be wary of burnout. Monitor yourself and adjust accordingly."

    DD: "I'm excited for this whole life on my own thing."

    Me: "That is normal and welcome. Keep a good head on your shoulders, work hard, and you will do very well."

    DD: "That's my plan. :) Thanks, Mom."

    One son is a surgical technologist, supporting his small family, and looking for advancement in his field or a neighboring medical field (possibly nursing).

    Another son is finishing a history major, and will be applying to law school. He's spending his summer studying for the LSATs.

    And my beautiful daughter is going to be a physical therapist, and is dating someone who seems to be a very nice man, polite and helpful.

    As a parent, most of us worry like crazy about raising our kids right, worry about their safety, worry about their attitudes about the world and how they'll handle life's slings and arrows, and worry about how well these beloved children will make their way in the world.

    Despite the fact that most on this board would consider my left-leaning politics and my lack of religion a large detriment, I have managed to raise three well-adjusted kids who are well on their way to being happy, productive members of the human race.

    Although no child is perfect, I think I can finally heave a sigh of relief.
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

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  3. #2
    VIP Member Array Eagleks's Avatar
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    Congrats... it's good when they grow up and we can feel proud of they people they've become.

    I know a woman that I worked with who had 13 kids. When the youngest was in their late 30's, the youngest hadn't hit 5 yet. She seemed to have the key, as they have all done well and range from an F-16 pilot, a daughter who flew cobra's in the first Iraq, a couple of attorneys, a couple of attorneys , 2-3 that own thriving businesses, etc. But more than that, they are all honest , hard working and good people.

    They had not ALL been in the same place at that same time, and they were trying to arrange that one year..... all of them made it but 1 , who was flying "no fly" missions over Iraq.

    As my grandfather always drilled in to me, measure no man by his profession, his money, nor his success, measure him by the person he has become ... his integrity, his honesty, his treatment of others, and his actions .... and never by his religion, race, culture, family, background nor his socio-economic status in life.
    I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. --- Will Rogers ---
    Chief Justice John Roberts : "I don't see how you can read Heller and not take away from it the notion that the Second Amendment...was extremely important to the framers in their view of what liberty meant."

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    That is a great story.
    Congratulations !!

    I have a friend, who married my cousin, a while back, 13-14 years ago.
    She was always giving him the "when are we gonna start a family stuff.
    My oldest, a boy who was 6-7 at the time was/is very well mannered, humble and quiet.

    He would tell her," well if we could be guaranteed our kids would be like Ronnie" (my boy).
    Everyone felt the same way about my son.
    Even to this day, my son is the same way, at 22.
    I guess his momma raised him right!! (and the other 3 the same way)


    I included this in my small speech in the church, at my fathers funeral mass.
    It exemplified his life, as he was a simple man, with just a HS education, who provided good for his family, as a lowley small city DPW employee.

    "When you were born you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so
    that when you die you are smiling and everyone around you is crying."


    Don't know who is responsible for it, but its a pretty neat saying.
    If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.

    Washington didn't use his freedom of speech to defeat the British, He shot them!

    Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy." -- Ernest Benn

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    VIP Member Array BugDude's Avatar
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    Congratulations!!! I have a 9 year old and a 2 year old and I find myself wondering how in the world do parents keep their kids on the right path with so many pitfalls in society. It sounds like you have good kids with good heads on their shoulders. You have a lot to be proud of.
    Know Guns, Know Safety, Know Peace.
    No Guns, No Safety, No Peace.


    Guns are like sex and air...its no big deal until YOU can't get any.

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    Member Array 640girl's Avatar
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    wonderful!!!! There is nothing like being a parent.

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    There are always up and downs in parenting, but when things finally turns out well...it makes all the problems, sacrifice, frustration, and disappointments worthwhile...congrats on a job well done.
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

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    Congrats.

    I've seen it go every which way. Usually, maybe I should just say "often," you can figure out what is going to happen by looking at the parents. So, be rightfully proud of yourself and your kids. If you weren't doing the right things it is fair to say the kids wouldn't be doing well. Be proud of yourself indeed.

    (Yes, I've seen messed up parents produce OK kids and the other way around, but overall if you want good kids be a good parent.)
    oneshot likes this.

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    Congratulations. That is something to be very proud of!!!!!!!!

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    Congrats on the progression of your children.

    As we toil to teach our children to be successful and responsible adults, we must be mindful......lest we ultimately fail because we omitted the most important knowledge.
    Last edited by jwarren; April 10th, 2011 at 04:31 AM.

  11. #10
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    You have good reason to be proud! It's always great when your love, and hard work is reflected in their level of maturity and their goals and life's plan for the future. Good job gilraen!
    -Bark'n
    Semper Fi


    "The gun is the great equalizer... For it is the gun, that allows the meek to repel the monsters; Whom are bigger, stronger and without conscience, prey on those who without one, would surely perish."

  12. #11
    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Thank you, everyone.

    My favorite quote about parenting is this, and I can only paraphrase...
    "The decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is the decision to wear your heart on the *outside* of your body -- for the rest of your life."

    Eagleks:
    "As my grandfather always drilled in to me, measure no man by his profession, his money, nor his success, measure him by the person he has become ... his integrity, his honesty, his treatment of others, and his actions .... and never by his religion, race, culture, family, background nor his socio-economic status in life."

    I would like to have met your grandfather. He had it absolutely right.

    -- 13 kids? Eesh. That woman deserved a medal.

    Oneshot you sound like you have wonderful kids. I applaud you (and/or their momma :) ) I have seen that quote, and it's one I've saved. I love it.

    Hopyard, you are very right. The problem comes in when everyone has a different idea on what it means to be a "good parent."

    Bugdude, here is my advice. I make no guarantees, because every child is different, and every parent is different. But this worked for me.

    1) Age appropriate responsibilities, age appropriate freedoms. Start early! Within safe limits, let them experiment, let them make mistakes. Don't laugh or humiliate them because of their mistakes, either.
    2) Discipline consistently, and use the mildest discipline you can that gets the job done.
    3) Respect your child as an individual person. They are not you in miniature. They have a right to their opinions. They have a right to not like your rules and decisions. Just make sure they know they still have to be respectful and obedient.
    4) As much as reasonably possible, respect their likes and dislikes. No child needs to be beaten because they won't eat peas. For bog's sake, give them green beans! (I'm beginning to hate the term "willful." It hides a multitude of abuses.)
    5) Keep the lines of communications open, always. Make sure they know they can come to you and talk about ANYthing, regardless of what it is, and that you will listen - respectfully. You don't have to like what they're saying, or doing. But you have to listen, advise them, help them, and - only when necessary - punish them.
    6) Learn to say "I don't know." and "Let's find out."
    7) Learn to say "I'm sorry." You don't lose respect from your kids by saying that, you GAIN their respect.
    8) Absolute, unconditional love. I told my kids: "Even if you became a murderer, I would HATE what you did, but I would still love you. You would need to go to prison, but I would still love you."
    9) Remember that when your children are at their least lovable, that's when they need your love the most.
    10) If they obey you because they fear you, you will only control them until they are grown. Then you have no respect from them, and no control over them at all -- you've lost them. If they obey you because you love and respect them - and they want to keep that love and respect, you will have forged a link that will stay with you both for the rest of your lives.
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

  13. #12
    Member Array vietnamvet66's Avatar
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    I have four children, and in this day and age, I must say that I am very proud not to have ever had to pick any of them up at a police station for anything. That said I have three teachers,
    one elementry ed, one high school math, and one high school gym and physical trainer. thr fourth is married and going back to finish to be a special ed teacher.
    I am also a proud parent. I believe that the rules set above are as close as I could have written myself. Gilraen, you did a fine job.
    US ARMY Veteran 1965-1967 Vietnam 1966-1967
    WELCOME HOME TO ALL WHO SERVED, AND FOR THOSE STILL SERVING,
    A BIG THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE. FOR THOSE OF YOU DOWN RANGE
    WATCH YOUR 6, AND KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN.
    A PATRIOT BELIEVES IN IT....A VETERAN LIVED IT

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