This is a discussion on Don't Wait within the Bob & Terry's Place forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Last Thursday while driving in to work for 12 hours of night shift making electrons, I thought about calling my Dad on the West Coast. ...
June 6th, 2013 01:31 AM
Last Thursday while driving in to work for 12 hours of night shift making electrons, I thought about calling my Dad on the West Coast. But then I thought, "No, he will call me tomorrow on my birthday."
Well while sleeping after shift during the day on Friday, my wife called in tears telling me that me father had been in an accident and didn't make it. So now I am trying to get over the self-imposed guilt of not calling that day.
Don't wait, make the call.
"The natural progress of things is for liberty to yield, and government to gain ground."
- Thomas Jefferson
"I'm the arrow, you're my bow, shoot me forth and I will go"
"Do not let any individual posts put a knot in your Big Boy Under-Roos"
June 6th, 2013 01:31 AM
June 6th, 2013 01:41 AM
My condolences on your loss, I too know the feeling. Mine was when the First Sergeant called me in and told me my emergency leave had been approved and I was free to go.
When you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk.
"Don't forget, incoming fire has the right of way."
June 6th, 2013 01:44 AM
Mike, I'm really sorry to hear of your loss. I lost both my parents within 3 weeks about 20 years ago, and overall it was a game-changer for me. I, too, failed to make that call that I should have.
God had different plans for both you and your Dad than what you envisioned. I have no doubts it'll take you a while to accept this loss, but know that you'll learn from it.
Hopefully you have people near and dear to you to be with you through this, both short term and long haul. May God's peace be with you, brother.
NRA Endowment Member
June 6th, 2013 01:53 AM
Sorry For Your Loss . . . don't feel guilt just remember the good times you had together we all have "ah would ah could ah should ah" moment in our life and like you said; life is too short to wait till tomorrow
June 6th, 2013 01:56 AM
Not kidding, do it.
Same thing happend to me a few months ago, cept mine made it but now is a quad...he was on thin ice in an ICU for 7 months.
Don't let the sunset on your anger.
June 6th, 2013 02:22 AM
Very sorry to hear it. Good advice for all.
June 6th, 2013 02:46 AM
June 6th, 2013 02:53 AM
Join the club. That's happened to me 6 times (wish I was joking) before ......
Originally Posted by CT-Mike
most recently had this nagging thought one evening I needed to call my sister and hadn't talked to her in a while. Looked at the time, thought... it's too late for her .. she's in bed, I'll call her first thing in the morning. Uh, next morning got a call ...... told she had died the night before...... just about the time I was getting that nagging feeling about calling her. If I had, maybe she wouldn't have layed down when she did..... which an hour later when BIL tried to wake her... she didn't wake up. She , was the 7th.
Each time, the same thing..... they died literally by the next morning or the next morning. I told my brother, if I get that feeling about you ..... you are just going to have to get out of bed.... no matter how late it is, because I'm calling. He told me if I call him that late.... he's going to the hospital right then.
Sorry to hear about your loss.... mother's and father's , well..... they are always there to talk to, always there .. ya know.... and when they aren't ... but you take a lot of them along with you ....
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. --- Will Rogers ---
Chief Justice John Roberts : "I don't see how you can read Heller and not take away from it the notion that the Second Amendment...was extremely important to the framers in their view of what liberty meant."
June 6th, 2013 08:46 AM
Very sorry indeed for this, my prayers are offered. Happened to me when my favourite grandmother died and I did not stay the night at my parents home where she was. She died early the next morning. I knew I should have stayed, but didn't and cannot change it. I get over it with all the fond memories of life with her instead of without.
We cannot see into the future if there is actually going to be one and I know it hurts because you did not call your dad prior to the accident. We can never know what is going to happen and when. Don't beat yourself up for this, you cannot be at fault for not doing something that you look back at and wish you had.
We all are in a journey and sometimes the arrival to the destination is not clear or revealed. Take comfort though that you had a number of years with your father and dwell on those instead of the last moment of indecision.
"A Smith & Wesson always beats 4 aces!"
The Man Prayer. "Im a man, I can change, if I have to.....I guess!" ~ Red Green
June 6th, 2013 08:49 AM
Prayers have been made for your father and your entire family. May God bless, keep and watch over you all.
U.S. Army Desert Storm Veteran
Certified Police Firearms Instructor
Former US Customs Blue Lighting Strike Force Commissioned Officer
Advanced Highway Drug Interdiction Specialist
Graduate Regional Counter Drug Training Academy
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June 6th, 2013 09:00 AM
I'm so very sorry! Easier said than done I know, but try and let go of the guilt and think on the good times you and he shared.
June 6th, 2013 09:31 AM
Mike, I'm so very sorry to hear that your Dad passed away. It's harder when it's a sudden thing because you don't get a chance to mentally and emotionally adjust to the idea that they are going.
It sounds as if you had a good relationship with him and that's the most important thing. Don't beat yourself up over not calling him, no one knows what the future holds.
I firmly believe that we are all reunited eventually. So it's not "good bye", it's "I'll see you later".
Thanks for reminding us of the importance of connecting with our loved ones here and now.
June 6th, 2013 09:50 AM
I am very sorry for your loss, and I have a similar experience...I do understand your feelings...hang in there.
"That I cannot do."
"Give this to, uh, Clemenza. I want reliable people, people who aren't going to be carried away. After all we're not murderers in spite of what this undertaker thinks."
Certified Glock Armorer
NRA Life Member
June 6th, 2013 10:05 AM
Sorry to here that condolences to you and your family
June 6th, 2013 10:10 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss Mike.
My grandmother lived next door to my parents and and ex-girlfriend and I went by to see my parents but decided against stopping by to see grandma thinking that I would next time. Got the call two days later that she had a heart attack and passed and we all drove out there to be with her before they came and took her body. Still one of the stupidest things I have ever done, it would have only taken five minutes to just say hi.
Been calling it like I see it since 1988 and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon.