My friend was beaten and raped

This is a discussion on My friend was beaten and raped within the Bob & Terry's Place forums, part of the The Back Porch category; She just called me to tell me the news. I hadn't heard from her in a few days. She did not want to talk about ...

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Thread: My friend was beaten and raped

  1. #1
    Restricted Member Array SelfDefense's Avatar
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    My friend was beaten and raped

    She just called me to tell me the news. I hadn't heard from her in a few days. She did not want to talk about it at all so I have no details.

    I am at a loss as to what to do for her. She doesn't want to see or talk to anyone. She was just released from the hospital with physical injuries, including broken bones. I'm sure she fought hard.

    We have previously discussed that she should carry but she has never taken it seriously.

    Please think of Maxine in your prayers.

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  3. #2
    VIP Member Array Redneck Repairs's Avatar
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    Ill light a candle for her. About all you can do is be there for her and support her as you can unless/untill she is ready to talk it out or take action.
    Make sure you get full value out of today , Do something worthwhile, because what you do today will cost you one day off the rest of your life .
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  4. #3
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    Don't know what to say...................

    Just don't turn it into an 'I told you so'!
    Quemadmodum gladius neminem occidit, occidentis telum est.-Seneca

    "If you carry a gun, people will call you paranoid. If I have a gun, what do I have to be paranoid about?" -Clint Smith

    "An unarmed man can only flee from evil, and evil is not overcome by fleeing from it." -Jeff Cooper

  5. #4
    Senior Member Array joleary223's Avatar
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    That's awful! Maybe some of our female members can help, in the open or with a PM to you. They might be able to give you an idea what you can do for her. I wouldn't know the first thing to say to someone in that position, just be her friend and give her space I guess.
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  6. #5
    Senior Member Array Ride4TheBrand's Avatar
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    Prayers sent
    "We must remember that one man is much
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  7. #6
    Member Array phaed's Avatar
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    best wishes for your friend. all i can suggest is to let them know you are there for them if they need you. i'm not sure what else, as i'm sure this is a delicate time, and you want to "do no more harm."

    i think there's someone on the board with similar experiences. hopefully they'll shoot you a pm with suggestions.
    War is not the ugliest of things. Worse is the decayed state of moral feeling which thinks nothing is worth a war. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which he cares for more than his personal safety, is a miserable creature who has no chance of being free. -J.S. Mill

  8. #7
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    This happened to my sister in-law. It is comparable to losing a child. THere just isn't anything much to be done. The pain doesn't go away.

    Hopefully your friend will be wise enough to seek whatever medical care and counselling she might need. Beyond that, ....it is just the most awkward thing for friends and relatives to deal with.

    Ten years on my sister in-law can only refer to the incident as "her accident." She can not say the word.

  9. #8
    Ex Member Array Creature's Avatar
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    God bless her and give her strength.

    Speaking from experience regarding trauma and loss...despite her saying no calls or visits, consider calling and visiting whenever you can. She will answer your call if she wants to talk and wont pick up if she doesnt. Same with answering the doorbell.

  10. #9
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    Without wishing to impose on limatunes - it just could be if she had the time she could help this lady - as she has previously described what she went thru herself.

    The first battle will be having her realize that talking it about will - ultimately - probably be the only way she will be able to come to terms. That will take time but knowing how someone else coped can be helpful.

    Thoughts go out to her.
    Chris - P95
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  11. #10
    Distinguished Member Array BIG E's Avatar
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    I am so sorry.

    She will be in our thoughts.

    Hopefully she can provide some info that will help catch the scumbag.

    I think he should be dealt with out of the "system".
    Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft!

    -- Theodore Roosevelt --

  12. #11
    Senior Moderator
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    My prayers sent to God and an incoming PM to you.

  13. #12
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    I don't know what to say....this stuff leaves me angry and speechless. My best wishes for your friend's speedy recovery and to you the strenght to help her as much as she needs.

    And if they find the perp, UPS his butt down here....lot of hungry needy gators in the Everglades.
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

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    Signed: Me!

  14. #13
    Member Array Mad_Max's Avatar
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    My profound sadness and prayers....

  15. #14
    Senior Member Array flagflyfish's Avatar
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    Prayers sent up.. All you can do is be there for her when she needs you.
    "These are the times that try men's souls. The summer soldier
    and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the
    service of his country; but he that stands it now, deserves the
    love and thanks of man and woman."

    -- Thomas Paine (The American Crisis, No. 1, 19 December 1776)

  16. #15
    Distinguished Member Array Black Knight's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear the news. She'll be in our prayers. Glad she "survived" the ordeal. Right now the best thing you can do is be a real friend. Give her the space she needs and wants yet be close enough that she can reach out when she needs. Let her dictate the speed that she is comfortable with. I'm sure the hospital took care of notifying the police and giving her info on victim counselors. As someone else said don't make this an I told you so episode. Be a real friend.

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