Preventing someone from getting too close

This is a discussion on Preventing someone from getting too close within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; On another thread there is a discussion about someone who was open carrying being robbed. The statement was made that his first mistake was to ...

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Thread: Preventing someone from getting too close

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    VIP Member Array mlr1m's Avatar
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    Preventing someone from getting too close

    On another thread there is a discussion about someone who was open carrying being robbed. The statement was made that his first mistake was to allow someone to get to close to him. I have seen this statement in many threads. How someone has made the mistake of letting the BG get into striking zone.
    My question is how do you prevent it? Do you yell at anyone that is within striking distance to stay away? It seems that it is near impossible when in public to keep a distance between yourself and strangers. I try to be aware of my surroundings but I still find myself closer than I like to strangers on the street. Other than running or yelling like a banshee what do you do? Afterall most of these strangers are not dangerous.

    Michael

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    I may have made one of the comments about letting someone get too close. There are some "if's" with that statement.
    Obviously, one cannot control the distance from other individuals in many places (stores, movie theaters, etc.), but when seeing others approach out on the street or in a parking lot...a different story...depends upon the situation.

    Sometimes we may have individuals who seem to appear out of nowhere, and I have had that happen in the past in a parking lot. Sometimes it is impossible to have eyes in the back of your head...I'm working on it.

    In other circumstances, I have avoided little gatherings I could spot out on the street, and I have announced my intention to avoid an 'interview' in a parking lot by panhandlers or 'salesmen'.
    I'm not a friendly guy when approached out in the open. I do not let strangers get too close to me without an unfriendly voice, expression, and physical signals/body language...I have not yet had anyone interpret my 'communication' as any thing but, "I think I'll leave that crazy guy alone...there are easier pickins".
    Last edited by RETSUPT99; June 12th, 2010 at 10:40 AM.
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    As a civilian, it can bee hard to keep people at a safe distance, as you can't just point a gun at anyone inside your "bubble" and tell them to stop. Sometimes you may have to ceate the distance if you think someone is a threat. Sometimes just your attitude can give off a vibe that will keep people away, i.e. they might think you are a bg.

    If you yell at everyone who gets withing striking distance, your voice is going to be gone pretty soon depending on how often you go to crowded places.

    Good situation awareness is more important than trying to keep everyone in the world more than 10 feet away. That way you can identify potential threats, and take actions accordingly, while at the same time not just locking yourself at home and avoiding human contact, because like you said, the vast majority of people don't want to do you any harm. And when a person wants to do you physical harm, there are certain indicators that you can pick up on if you know what you are looking for. A lot of those indicators go across cultural lines and seem to be ingrained in human nature.

    Then again, you could just not shower for months on end, that could solve your problem
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    Quote Originally Posted by buckeyeLCPL View Post
    As a civilian, it can bee hard to keep people at a safe distance, as you can't just point a gun at anyone inside your "bubble" and tell them to stop. Sometimes you may have to ceate the distance if you think someone is a threat. Sometimes just your attitude can give off a vibe that will keep people away, i.e. they might think you are a bg.

    If you yell at everyone who gets withing striking distance, your voice is going to be gone pretty soon depending on how often you go to crowded places.

    Good situation awareness is more important than trying to keep everyone in the world more than 10 feet away. That way you can identify potential threats, and take actions accordingly, while at the same time not just locking yourself at home and avoiding human contact, because like you said, the vast majority of people don't want to do you any harm. And when a person wants to do you physical harm, there are certain indicators that you can pick up on if you know what you are looking for. A lot of those indicators go across cultural lines and seem to be ingrained in human nature.

    Then again, you could just not shower for months on end, that could solve your problem
    I'm not sure that anyone would be 'yelling' for others to get away in a crowded place, and if you did, people would be calling 911 on you.
    I would think it takes awareness to understand who you direct to stay away or to get back...more likely those acting oddly and following or getting ready to obstruct your present path. OMOYMV
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    In crowded places you have a few options. Walls, Isles, merchandise, carts, family members. I use all of them on occasion to keep people in front more than keep people away. Keeping everyone away is not an option. But if someone gets your attention you can keep that one person away, if not everyone. When I OC, I pay particular attention to keep the firearm away from people I don't know. I'll turn my strong side to a wall, cart, or my wife. I can't say I can cover every situation. Particularly since I have 2 young girls and keeping up with them takes a lot of attention away. Oh, and rule one for me is keep my strong hand free of anything that I can. Either it's empty or I have to be willing to drop anything I am holding.
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    Wife and I both CC and watch each others back.

    We tend to be out together most of the time, and just work together as a team when it comes to SA.

    You can even teach older children to be SA without overdoing it.

    When possible BGs get to close I become very aware of my 6 and tend to move at 90* angle to possible BG while checking my 6.
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    You have to use some discretion, but oc or a front thrust kick both work pretty well.

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    If someone is out to rob you it is unlikely they will do it with witnesses around. Biggest risk is when you are some place lightly populated such as a parking lot. A person approaching just to interact (interview) is extremely suspect and that is the time to change direction or do anything to maintain distance.

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    Copious amounts of onions and garlic in my food helps. Also I think the whole deoderant thing is over rated.


    OK just kidding. IMO there is no real way to keep your distance from everyone you might encounter at your local mall or wally world. I think this is where SA and common sense come into play. The most important thing is to keep alert and see the troubling types before they get too close.
    It is surely true that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. Nor can you make them grateful for your efforts.

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    You can't keep everyone from getting too close. After all, it's not illegal for someone to get in your personal space and I it's not legal to use force to prevent that unless there's some other intent of harm that's already been expressed. I mean, I'd be pissed if I couldn't walk down the sidewalk and pass people without every other person warning me off.

    I think the posts are referring to letting someone already identified as potential trouble get too close and put you in yellow/orange alert. Retreat, alter your course, wait for them to show where they're going first, or whatever you need to do. If you encounter more than one of these situations a week you need to move :)

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    Keep in mind that everyone has the right to be there in public and you own no "space."
    If you can't pre-determine that someone is a BG (and can we?), that person cannot be told to "keep your distance."
    Retired USAF E-8. Lighten up and enjoy life because:
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    I have an arm's length rule of thumb that I try and work with if the individual that is getting into that space is setting off an uneasy feeling with me. I have no problem blading my strong side away and using my off side arm to push or ward off that person. It dosen't happen that often but I do have a personal space that I will take control over. If I am on duty in uniform that space depending on the situation becomes twice the distance or more. Eye contact also has the ability to let others know that there approch is not welcome. With that said I really am a gregarious type of person on my own terms. LOL.
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    As was mentioned, sometimes it is impossible to keep someone out of your space. Most times, I'm very aware of the approach. That said, there are certain times I will be much more vigilant in my actions toward the "approach-ee". Pumping gas and parking lots (especially Wall Mart) at night are at the top of my list. It seems this covers 90% of my approaches over the past few years. I have long believed (and preached to my family) that being polite is what allows someone to get close and interview you. The BG's are aware of it and very good at testing you. They practice it a lot, we don't. Therefore, nobody should feel ashamed being assertive when someone invades your space at an inappropriate time. My pet phrases are "Back Off!" or "Don't come near me at this time of night." I'm right handed and usually have my left arm extended pointing toward their direction. In the hand of that left arm is a small can of pepper spray that is all but invisible. My right hand is usually on the butt of my J frame which I pocket carry in the right front pocket of my jeans. My body stance is usually bladed away from them with my strong side hidden. I can draw surprisingly fast if need be or give them a dose of the spray if I choose. I'm happy to report never having to spray or draw on anyone to protect myself or my family. I have turned a few low life's around with my "technique" though. Usually I will hear some choice words as they comply.That's OK by me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Old School View Post
    I have an arm's length rule of thumb that I try and work with if the individual that is getting into that space is setting off an uneasy feeling with me. I have no problem blading my strong side away and using my off side arm to push or ward off that person. It dosen't happen that often but I do have a personal space that I will take control over. If I am on duty in uniform that space depending on the situation becomes twice the distance or more. Eye contact also has the ability to let others know that there approch is not welcome. With that said I really am a gregarious type of person on my own terms. LOL.
    Given that no situation was presented other than someone getting too close, that action could easily be construed as an assault.

    Two people trying to get into cars in ajoining parking spots? Endless number of cases where someone may get too close.

    Perhaps try simply backing away since you're the one who's uncomfortable. No one, not even LEOs, have the right to push people out of their space.

    The reason someone might get "too close" is that they're not alarming. And by then it's usually too late.
    Retired USAF E-8. Lighten up and enjoy life because:
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orange Boy View Post
    As was mentioned, sometimes it is impossible to keep someone out of your space. Most times, I'm very aware of the approach. That said, there are certain times I will be much more vigilant in my actions toward the "approach-ee". Pumping gas and parking lots (especially Wall Mart) at night are at the top of my list. It seems this covers 90% of my approaches over the past few years. I have long believed (and preached to my family) that being polite is what allows someone to get close and interview you. The BG's are aware of it and very good at testing you. They practice it a lot, we don't. Therefore, nobody should feel ashamed being assertive when someone invades your space at an inappropriate time. My pet phrases are "Back Off!" or "Don't come near me at this time of night." I'm right handed and usually have my left arm extended pointing toward their direction. In the hand of that left arm is a small can of pepper spray that is all but invisible. My right hand is usually on the butt of my J frame which I pocket carry in the right front pocket of my jeans. My body stance is usually bladed away from them with my strong side hidden. I can draw surprisingly fast if need be or give them a dose of the spray if I choose. I'm happy to report never having to spray or draw on anyone to protect myself or my family. I have turned a few low life's around with my "technique" though. Usually I will hear some choice words as they comply.That's OK by me.
    You sound like a very threatening person, unhapply living in fear of your life, and an incident waiting to happen.
    Ah, whatever happened to politeness and common courtesy.
    Here in FL, I have the right to be anywhere in the public, and can defend myself without any need to retreat, such as in parking lots and gas stations. So does everyone else. Keep in mind that the next person whom you challenge may reply in kind.
    Retired USAF E-8. Lighten up and enjoy life because:
    Paranoia strikes deep, into your heart it will creep. It starts when you're always afraid... "For What It's Worth" Buffalo Springfield

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