Some of us have experienced incidents while out with family or significant others where we picked up on a potential threat or other such serious incident and had the urge to evac the family or others without coming right out and saying it and panicking the rest of the folks around us or giving ourselves away to the potential threat.
Do any of you actually have a "shut up and go word" for those times when you're trying to hurry a significant other out of the store etc... and they're either not paying attention or not heeding your hurried exit?
I'm thinking along the lines of something like a safe word, but on the opposite end like a "just shut up and go" word for potential threat or emergency purposes... IE something that you could work into a random sentence that the other would understand/pick up on the urgency.
I want to stop at geronimo burger on the way home.
so geronimo said, "what you mean we, kimosabe?"
No, I/we don't have such a word. Telling my SO, even in a dangerous situation, what to do, would stop her in her tracks and start an argument... "What do you mean, GERONIMO! I ain't gonna shut up and go... anywhere with you! I don't care about that pansy over there with the ski mask and the Gangsta Glock... You do not tell me where to go... You got me?!"
Me (in my best underdog voice) "Yes dear...."
"That's what I'm talkin' about... Now YOU shut up and go!"
That was a joke, son...
not a bad idea... some obscure brand name or brand name sounding word might make do in most situations... like geronimo above..
Telling my SO, even in a dangerous situation, what to do, would stop her in her tracks and start an argument... "What do you mean, GERONIMO! I ain't gonna shut up and go... anywhere with you! I don't care about that pansy over there with the ski mask and the Gangsta Glock... You do not tell me where to go... You got me?!"
Me (in my best underdog voice) "Yes dear...."
"That's what I'm talkin' about... Now YOU shut up and go!"
Whenever I see something like that in a movie, it lights my fire and I tell my wife if you ever pull anything like that you'll be talking to yourself cause I'll already be gone. Same as the person that says "I can't" (jump the 6" to the fireman's ladder). Leave them and go find somebody who can!
I'm thinking it can't be something like a brand name or anything. It's going to have to be something that doesn't come up in normal conversation. Otherwise, the meaning will be lost in overuse.
edit:
maybe a phrase like "I have a call from 9 to 11" or "we have to schedule our flight from the 9th to the 11th" or something along those lines to get the person moving when they've not picked up on your need to evac.
I don't know.. I think it's been years since I've said the word geronimo in normal conversation... something like your 911 separated with other words to obscure it makes it hard to decipher... this word or phrase should need no thought... 9th to the 11th... "what are you talking about it's the 15th already... oh.. okay..."
In an emergent situation, you need a one word command... that means "drop everything and come with me". phraseology does not work well... particularly if it has to be "decoded" to be understood. The word is only gonna come from you or your SO, one to the other... If someone else says it, it means nothing... If you always say "pop" for a carbonated beverage... you could use soda... If you always buy Coke or Pepsi or Mt. Dew you could use the word cola.
Usually, if there's time to talk in code words, there's time to react pre-emptively... for example: if your code word causes hesitation/questioning in your SO... they can look at you, you can move your eyes or otherwise non-verbally signal them...
I have this setup with my kids.
It is a phrase rather than word that is not to be used in jest ever and is only practiced when we are at home and it's announced before hand that we are practicing it.
Basically it is a statement that it is time to go feed our dog.
Only the dogs name that we use is that of my old dog who is now dead....That is the kicker.
So I say to either kid something along the lines of 'We need to leave; Soon it'll be time to feed Rin Tin-Tin' [Not my dogs name...Just an example] and well my kids now know and are practiced that means STOP what you are doing IMMEDIATELY no matter what it is or who you were talking to and to come to me (Dad) IMMEDIATELY as with intent to exit the location right now. Not tomorrow or after whining and begging. Right this moment instant.
And they know that I would not and do not use it capriciously nor jokingly.
If I say the phrase then that specifically means that I believe there is imminent danger.
Imminent as in we have very little time to act, so as to not suffer.
My wife thinks it's hokey. Fine, she gets left is what I told her as she can watch our backs as we depart.
My daughter (8) thinks it's a very good idea and she on her won will work with her brother (4) to practice same when they are playing pretend life at home. She'll make something up like oh no there's a bear outside...Or a BG is at the store, to which commonly my son will comment it's okay dad can use his pepper spray. :lol:
I got the idea two summer ago as I was in the yard working on our pool with my kids off in the yard playing.
I heard a jingle jangle noise faint but getting closer and as I stood up to see what it was a flash of black went by heading toward the kids direction.
As per my usual I was armed. I jumped off the deck and headed toward them at the mid point of the arc where I last saw the blur headed.
At the same time I yelled out to my kids in a voice they up to then had never heard; KIDS! COME TO ME _RIGHT_ NOW!!.
My daughter without hesitation grabbed my sons hand ( he was just 2 then) and they both bolted fast as they little kid feet could. She rallyed directly behind me at my legs holding her brother, and looking around.
It turned out to be a large but friendly black Lab owned by visiting relatives from my neighbor three houses down the block.
The noise I heard was it's tags. It had gotten out of the house and they came by minutes later looking for it. I pointed them in the direction it went and they walked by my front window like 10m later with it on leash as from my neighbors property.
That same days over dinner we three talked about what happened and I told them I was very proud that they came right to me as they did, dropping their toys.
We then decided to make up this phrase so that next time life occurs they would know what I mean and know how to react. My kids have talked about that day often since. and our plan thank goodness has not needed to be used again, yet. Knock wood.
thanks Janq awesome post
I have this sort of phrase thing like yourself.. But now I'll use something like yours for a "we need to leave/get to safety now on me"
I have a "go word" or a "fight word" if the BG has the drop on us or we are in a heated situation where I know I now have to defend our lives as soon as a say the word in the sentence, it means "fight is on". I do this because people's minds will wait for the phrase or sentence to be finished it is just how the mind works. for an example the go word is "on" : "Don't Tread 'on'...." see the BG will be waiting for me to finish with the sentence.. the fight word is like a cliffhanger so it should give me a few seconds to react to the situation.
we have a very effective sentence that works well..."no questions, just move to .... now!" the problem with single words and code words is there still has to be a plan...and the hesitation or thought involved in the plan can be enough for trouble...i use very explicit instructions to get the results i need now without hesitation and if we are someplace public emy wife and child understand is i am using a tone that is firm and demanding it isnt a time for argument....its a time for action...questions come later...my look trumps any dirty look my wife can give me when i need immediate cooperation....
code words work at home...they get people to their safe place and prepared for the worst....out in public they are in a vacuum and need direction or they are as likely to walk into the problem as away from it...i dont ask for anyone to follow me as that leaves them unprotected...i direct them to safety and follow them to gaurd their six....not just against potential bad guys but also potential dangerous situations...
We lived in the jungle & then Bogota Colombia for 15 years, and have spent almost 15 more years in other Latin countries. "Just do it NOW" is the only thing that ever really worked. We tried code words and they just never seemed to work. My daughters would stop and try to assess the threat that I saw. My wife, God love her, would stop and try to remember if it was a code word or not.
Even in high attack/kidnap situations where we worked for so long, I could never get code words to work. I always knew where we would go when something would happen, so that's where I would direct family & co-workers. We even had a siren system for security. The rule was when the siren sounds you hide under a table (especially in the school) and wait for security to deal with whatever the problem was. But people would go outside, kids would look out the windows, all just trying to see what was going on.
Always know where you can take those you love to protect them. Safe room or whatever. No one will take care of my family like I personally can. That's just the way it is in the real world.
Many years ago, the monthly duress codeword at the nuclear alert pad at base X was "antelope." A buddy and I were dispatched to repair a "cocked" B-52 and while waiting for the guard to finish checking our badges, etc., the buddy mentioned that he'd just come off leave from an antelope hunt. Next thing I knew we were both face down in the dirt, red-faced, and with a LOT of explaining to do.
Had a very similar experience while working ICBM maintenance... Best part about it was as soon as my assistant uttered the word on the radio he knew exactly what he had done and said "*****!" over the net loud and clear.
Like bladenbullet and Guantes, it's pretty much "move NOW ......!" followed by the location, etc. I like the idea of a word or phrase, it's just not something we've tried out. My 5 year old questions EVERYTHING. Luckily, one time a loose pitt bull saw us and bolted towards my daughter. She reached for my hand when we both saw it and I just said "run now" and she went towards the house, about 20 yards away. It actually worked, which was surprising seeing as she would usually ask "why?"
^^^^ That's mine. Or, "We're out, NOW." My wife can tell by my tone. Not a bad idea to have a code word though that wouldn't alert anyone else around. I'll have to think on that one. I like the feed the dog idea, but knowing my 9 year old daughter she'd break into a long diatribe about how we don't have the dog anymore.
In the same vein, a friend and his wife have a system that if a BG is in the home with them when the other comes home, the recent arrival is called by their middle name. The new arrival knows to make an excuse (forgot the milk) to leave immediately and call the police (he's a police chief, btw)
This is a good idea. They used the same thing on CSI, except they would call the other CSI by their own last name, to make them aware somethings up. In other words, if Smith is in trouble, he tells Jones on the phone, "hello Smith this is Jones calling, can you bring me my cell phone?"
Of course with spouses the middle name make more sense.
:35:Excellent thoughts and ideas,haven't thought about it quite this way since the kids moved out.When it gets weird around the wife and me its "we're going now!" she looks at me and knows its time to move, we'll definitely discuss it afterward.
I remember a duress word we had back in the day,I was an SP duress word was (Cumquat),backup was (Cucumber).I had to ask WTH is a Cumquat,I'm pretty sure that anybody that uses cumquat in a sentence is few and far between
I think most of you with the "Let's go... NOW!" answer are missing the OP's point. There are times when the threat is close and could hear you. Or you don't want to cause a crowd to panic and trample your kids. A code word allows you both to be in code orange/red at the same time while not alerting the BG that you are preparing/making plans to avoid being a victim.
My wife and I use the word "pineapple" as a "this is a real emergeny and I'm not joking" code word. We have never had to use it in real life.
i completely understand this...my only concern being that the receiver of the code word is not aware of the situation in most cases and must be guided...following isnt an option for my family...i guide them and they lead while i stay between them and any threat...a code word is good for a planned situational response...in public where ther eare too many variables those you want to protect need guidance...not game words....
I would think twice about a code word that wasn't in everyday use, unless it was practiced a lot (which of course is part of the idea).
Comedian: "Cucumber! No,... carrot! No,... cauliflower! Oh, #@&$ Just run!"
"Kids, we need to go NOW" using the parental tone might be enough, especially if you talk about it beforehand.
There is a reason why parents shouldn't yell at their kids very often -- if yelling is the norm, no amount of yelling in an emergency will be listened to.
With my kids and wife ours is a phrase that you would hear anytime. "Just got a text from Brooks having car trouble." key to statement is Brooks is our cat. She can't text and doesn't drive
Contrary to a "lets go" word, I use "NOW" as an alert word. It is an alert word as it can relate to things other than escape. Essentailly ,iisten/watch for instructions/follow my lead, as it may preceed a counter attack as well as an escape.
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