Woman Being Assaulted

This is a discussion on Woman Being Assaulted within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Call 911 and verbally yell that "I've called the police" or "the police are on the way". I would not get involved in a physical ...

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Thread: Woman Being Assaulted

  1. #16
    Distinguished Member Array kapnketel's Avatar
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    Call 911 and verbally yell that "I've called the police" or "the police are on the way". I would not get involved in a physical altercation. As the LEO's here will tell you, domestics are the worst calls-the woman turns on the police when they cuff the guy more often than not. And I would never pull my weapon out. I do not see you defending a case where you get involved in a fight you were not in to begin with and shoot someone. At a minimum it is brandishing. And what happens when the police show up? They arrive and see a guy slapping a woman around and a guy with a gun in his hand no knowing who is who.

    All adds up to a lawsuit and possible arrest for you coming out of a situation in which you were not threatened nor personally involved.
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  3. #17
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    Call 911, get to a position of advantage, warn BG to desist, he is being watched, and the police are en route. Unfortunately, alcohol is usually involved, so being rational and feeling pain are diminished. Intervening physically may depend on your age and skill, but if you don't know whether BG is armed or GF will turn on you, it's a huge risk. However, if BG turns his attention to you, and you can't safely avoid his confrontation, do what's necessary to protect yourself.
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  4. #18
    VIP Member Array rammerjammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Secret Spuk View Post
    Based on my experience, and training... Call 9-1-1. Let the police handle it. It's been my experience that many women will turn on her saviour, and side with her abuser. This could result in the arrest of a civilian who intersede on her behalf. The average citizen has no indemnification from civil penalties, and may end up having this same digbat who he tried to help as a deduction of every pay check he draws for the rest of his life. Or worse her abusing boyfriend.
    Exactly. I'll call 911 but as the OP stated, this is her boyfriend who has an abusive past. She should have left the first time. I'm not jumping in to help a victim who will then possibly turn on me and make me hers and his victim.
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  5. #19
    Member Array TravisABQ's Avatar
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    I have a friend who has intervened in no less than 5 incidents of a woman being assaulted, every one of the women immediately attacked him.

    He is cured of that foolishness.

    A woman is only a victim once, after that she is a volunteer.
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  6. #20
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    It would be very difficult to not intervine...911 should be the first call made, also most phones now..well at least mine has a video camera on it...start filming. I will admit that in domestic disputes you never know how she will react. However, I saw the comment on here "sometimes doing the right thing is not doing the right thing". with that being said how can you sit there and watch some one get brutally beaten right in front of you and not try and stop it, at least by yelling. do you get in to an altercation? No, I call out and yell things that will get his attention on me, like stop, the police have been called, dont you know if she dies you will go to jail and be bubbas punching bag..things like that. the whole time video taping with my phone. Hopefully he will realize that I am filming and will stop. Now I have evidence to show the police and the beating has ceased........

    On a personnal note, Hope he sees me filming and tries to recover the evidence against him...cause now I will have tape of him beating a woman, and attacking me so when I hospitalize him I will have a pretty solid self defense case.

    Truth be told, I should be able to stop a beating of a grown woman verbally with out getting physically involved, now children on the other hand is a different story. I catch someone beating a kid, I will use as much physical force needed to stop that and deal with the court after. A grown woman can leave an abusive man...a kid cannot.

    please note at no point in this whole thing do I feel the need to draw my weapon. I am 6ft 260 and I train 5 days a week in Boxing, jujitsu and Muay Thai, unless the BG has a weapon, I dont feel a fire arm is needed from my stand point(yours may be different) and I would enjoy giving a whole sale ass whooping to the BG if he were to not stop or attack me to get my camera.

  7. #21
    Ex Member Array NYCrulesU's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NC Bullseye View Post
    I have several options on the force continuum before I ever get to deadly force. More tools to choose from makes this kind of decision a non issue. Only deadly force will be countered with deadly force.
    Agreed 100%.

  8. #22
    Distinguished Member Array INccwchris's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by modernknight View Post
    It would be very difficult to not intervine...911 should be the first call made, also most phones now..well at least mine has a video camera on it...start filming. I will admit that in domestic disputes you never know how she will react. However, I saw the comment on here "sometimes doing the right thing is not doing the right thing". with that being said how can you sit there and watch some one get brutally beaten right in front of you and not try and stop it, at least by yelling. do you get in to an altercation? No, I call out and yell things that will get his attention on me, like stop, the police have been called, dont you know if she dies you will go to jail and be bubbas punching bag..things like that. the whole time video taping with my phone. Hopefully he will realize that I am filming and will stop. Now I have evidence to show the police and the beating has ceased........

    On a personnal note, Hope he sees me filming and tries to recover the evidence against him...cause now I will have tape of him beating a woman, and attacking me so when I hospitalize him I will have a pretty solid self defense case.

    Truth be told, I should be able to stop a beating of a grown woman verbally with out getting physically involved, now children on the other hand is a different story. I catch someone beating a kid, I will use as much physical force needed to stop that and deal with the court after. A grown woman can leave an abusive man...a kid cannot.

    please note at no point in this whole thing do I feel the need to draw my weapon. I am 6ft 260 and I train 5 days a week in Boxing, jujitsu and Muay Thai, unless the BG has a weapon, I dont feel a fire arm is needed from my stand point(yours may be different) and I would enjoy giving a whole sale ass whooping to the BG if he were to not stop or attack me to get my camera.

    Yeah, I can stand back and not get physically involved, in fact I have before. Just call 911 and let them take care of it, your CCW is to defend you and yours, not to defend the woman who probably is used to this kind of behaviour and will turn on you in a heartbeat. Its not my problem to solve, in fact I left my cape at the dry cleaners one day and tried to pick it up and it was to small so no more superhero antics for me unless I am on the job and have my batbelt on. I have had a few domestics in my short time and I gotta tell you, getting involved is not a good idea for your average CCW'er, even if you get involved physically without drawing there is still at least one gun involved and thats the one on your belt. Stay back, call police, let them handle it. End of story. Now someone beating on a kid, different story, do what you gotta do.
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  9. #23
    Senior Member Array CowboyColby's Avatar
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    I was taught and raised you never raise your voice or hand to a lady. I grew up to find out not all women are ladies. In a restraunt I frequented about 3 times a week I was next to a couple arguing, not a big deal then it escalated and he hit her across the face. I intervened between the two when the male tried to get violent with me and started pushing me I knocked his butt on the ground when he got up I did it again. The owner (a friend) had called the police they showed up and the lady attempted to press charges against me. Had the owner of the restruant not told the police what happened I would had charges against me when I thought I was helping the poor lady. I hate to see women hit or abused and will not stand by while it happens but I may just call the police for her as opposed to risking my butt to help someone that is just going to turn on me and try to make me out to be the bad guy.

    Moral of the story stay out of domestic disputes. You can help with a phone call or asking the guy to stop if you have too but do not think for a second your helping a damsal in distress.

  10. #24
    Ex Member Array azchevy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pro2A View Post
    You see a woman being brutally attacked by a man on the street. You've seen them around the neighborhood before, this is her abusive boyfriend.

    You are armed, assume you are in this situation and don't respond with what you would have done to avoid it. I was running these various situations in my head today.
    I tell her she should have made him a sandwich.
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  11. #25
    Member Array modernknight's Avatar
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    LOL, nice all the comments here, apparently lots of people are scared to act. thats what is wrong with this country. too many people sit on the sideline regardless of what is going on. When does it stop? when do you say enough is enough? As I said in my post, my reaction may not be suited for everyone. If you can look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of what you did and not lose sleep then you did the right thing for you, however I am not you average CCW. I have over 17 combined years of military, security, Executive protection, corporate security and INTEL work among other different types of training. Like I said, if you can sleep at night and feel like a man then have at it. For me and my family, doing the right thing by doing the "wrong" thing (according to some of the posters) stopping the "Brutal" beating of ANYONE regardless of man or woman is the thing to do, right or wrong. And once again my situation maybe different because I have personnaly performed training scenarios for the local EOD and SWAT teams here and work on a daily basis with many State police officers. I am pretty sure the police have an ear on a repetive abusive situation and I will take my chances with the police and have my head held high.

    But I cant stress that what I would or would not do may not be and most likely is not what the nomal or average CCW person may do. does that mean I am wrong...no, It means I have a different outlook and situation. I do not intend to offend anyone, you do what you can live with.
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  12. #26
    Member Array kwoodford's Avatar
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    Actually had that happen. I pointed my gun at him and told him to get on the ground and ID's myself as an off duty Deputy. Oh he let her go and slowly sat down but the cops took so long t get there he got up and walked away. She came out of the house hugged and kissed him and they went inside. When the cops finally got there about 45 minutes later, told them what happened, he went inside and about 20 minutes later came out alone.

    I felt like *** was I doing but at least I stopped the assualt.

    What would I do now...pretty much the same and stop the assault.

  13. #27
    VIP Member Array smolck's Avatar
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    You guys say you'd stand there and let her get beat because she somehow "deserves" it. Nobody deserves to be brutally beaten, period. All of you should have your man card revoked. I ain't the biggest guy, but I'll be darned if I don't stop the beating. And I don't need my gun to do it. I can OC spray the guy, I can hit him with something heavy and large, or I can just push him off.

    Of course, the likelyhood of me witnessing an event such as this are nill.

  14. #28
    VIP Member Array Eagleks's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by smolck View Post
    You guys say you'd stand there and let her get beat because she somehow "deserves" it. Nobody deserves to be brutally beaten, period. All of you should have your man card revoked. I ain't the biggest guy, but I'll be darned if I don't stop the beating. And I don't need my gun to do it. I can OC spray the guy, I can hit him with something heavy and large, or I can just push him off.

    Of course, the likelyhood of me witnessing an event such as this are nill.
    and typically, she'll bail him out of jail that night. Just the way it is some times.

    I was asked to work with a very young woman who's BF was also pimping her, and beaten her severely several times. She was going to testify against him, and I was able to keep her on that path, until a couple of real know-it-all idiots got called into it and take over. Then 2 months later, I'm called to help out again .... because they had not done what they should have (long story) and now she was refusing to testify, wanted to go back to him because "he loved her" , and "promised he would never do it again" . They hadn't listened, and now ... there was no way she would testify against this guy for nearly beating her to death.

    The last thing I told her, " you do this, and one of these mornings I'm going to pick up the newspaper and it's going to say he beat you to death, and was arrested for murder" . She didn't believe it , and she did go back to him.

    I got so sick of hearing "BUT .... he LOVES ME ".... somehow in their mind figuring they are somehow different than all the other women the same guy has beaten in the past.


    About 1 1/2 months later I picked up the newspaper that morning to look at it, and sure enough.... front page, he had beaten her to death and was arrested for murder.
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  15. #29
    Member Array modernknight's Avatar
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    I get it. its a mental thing with battered women. I had a guy smack his wife in the apartment next door to me when I was in WA...she stayed with him and didnt testify.Not the first time I have seen it.... Do I feel for them yep but a grown woman CAN leave, if she wants to stay and get beaten to death then I guess it will happen but It will not happen in front of me.

  16. #30
    Senior Member Array SFury's Avatar
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    Then you have never been involved with a domestic dispute situation. I've been around them when things have gone sideways for the good samaritan(s) involved. It happens fast, and it never goes well. The two times I've been involved with domestic disputes the people who tried to help the battered GF/wife ended up badly. The first time a guy almost got beaten to death and was barely saved by his two friends with him. He almost went to jail, but the bystanders like myself kept him out of jail, but we couldn't heal the wounds he received.

    The other incident was when I served on a jury. The guy trying to help his female friend was stabbed 5 times by the jealous and controlling ex-husband that beat her. She testified not on her friends behalf, but for her ex-husband that she divorced because of the abuse. The friend almost died. Had one of 4 of the stab wounds been 1/2" one direction or another I would have been on a murder trial.

    These situations are at a high level of danger to begin with, and the mental state of those involved is impaired. There are few situations that are as inherently dangerous as domestic disputes.

    Get involved at your own peril. Not everyone realizes they need to make changes, and you can't force them to make better choices.

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