Woke up, drew on my . . . girlfriend! kinda long.

This is a discussion on Woke up, drew on my . . . girlfriend! kinda long. within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; You knwo what you did wrong. I don't think there is anything I can add. Just glad we're hearing this from you and not reading ...

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Thread: Woke up, drew on my . . . girlfriend! kinda long.

  1. #46
    RKM
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    You knwo what you did wrong. I don't think there is anything I can add. Just glad we're hearing this from you and not reading about it in a news article about a man who accidentally shot his girlfriend. Hopefully she isn't mad at you.

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  3. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by miller_man View Post
    To atctimmy -(snip) But to question "what im about". Those who know me would completely defend me on this one so i won't waste my time trying to convince you. .
    Friend let me make this clear. I don't care what you are about and you don't need character witnesses to prove it. You're the guy who was pointing a gun at your lady friend so the person who needs the answer is you.

    "Rebuke a wise man, and he will love thee" King Solomon (the wisest man to ever live)

    Mr Miller man when I said that you need to consider "what you are about" I meant that you need to sit down and think about where you want to go from here. You need to think about what happened and why. You need to think about goals. You need to think about your values.

    What are the goals of your life? What are you protecting? Why do you have a gun? What about safety?

    These are questions only you can answer. Good luck.
    Spirit51, l1a1, Bark'n and 3 others like this.
    Mark Twain:
    The government is merely a servant -- merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a
    patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.

  4. #48
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    So after further review are you about safety or are you about laziness?
    Bark'n likes this.
    Mark Twain:
    The government is merely a servant -- merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a
    patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.

  5. #49
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    My Ex..... would call me on the phone when she pulled up in her car to the house, so I knew she was about to come in the door. It didn't bother me that it woke me up, because in the very few minutes it took, I could go right back to sleep easily. I can't now, but I could then. She also would say, "I'm home" the second she came in the door, then I knew I could roll over and go back to sleep.

    No surprises that way.

    The only time that was a problem was one night when I heard noises and woke up, thought to myself..... (apparently outloud) ... "dang it, she forgot to call me first", to which she answered... "I'm right here and that wasn't me " .... and I realized she was in bed next to me. She didn't work that night. That's when I got my gun and went to check the source....

    My dogs let me know now, long before I even hear any noise, if there is something I need to be concerned about or paying attention to.
    Bark'n, sgb, Spirit51 and 1 others like this.
    I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. --- Will Rogers ---
    Chief Justice John Roberts : "I don't see how you can read Heller and not take away from it the notion that the Second Amendment...was extremely important to the framers in their view of what liberty meant."

  6. #50
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    I will second the thought of having an action or 2 built in to the process to make your weapon ready as it gives you a bit of time to focus on the task at hand of being awake enough to observe and evaluate the situation, handle a firearm if necessary and decide whether or not to use deadly force. Not saying you have to have a series of riddles and a Rubik's Cube to solve before you can defend yourself but there absolutely needs to be an action that has to happen in order to focus yourself on the gravity of the situation. Definately work out something with your signifigant other for ID purposes.

    If there appears to be a genuine situation that deadly force might be necessary I personally would not give away any tactical advantage by turning on the nightstand lamp, shouting for identification, or prematurely turning on a flashlight. I had a CCW instructor that was a very experienced police officer who had been in and emerged victorious in more than a handful of gunfights. His advice was basically this, after you have correctly identified the threat and decided upon deadly force the first sign the perpetrator should have that there is a problem should be the light from your muzzle flash. Obviously a tac light would make target ID much more sure under the circumstances.

    Regardless of what you do, GET AS MUCH TRAINING as you can bear. Read as much information about self defense as you can from reputable sources and practice a procedure that you will follow in the future. Figure out your Things that go bump in the night routine and practice and drill it until it is second nature. Use an airsoft, blue gun, whatever. Might not be a bad idea. People only respond in crisis to the highest level of training that they have mastered.

    Other than that, I am relieved that you and your girl were able to survive a potentially devestating situation and you are able to come here for guidance and critiquing.
    Bark'n, sgb, Spirit51 and 1 others like this.
    It's kind of like how some people have a sudden and insatiable desire to talk about vampires after the Twilight series became popular, except zombies are much less gay and more likely to exist one day

  7. #51
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    I've got nothing to add that hasn't already been stated except; Has anyone else ever noticed that it works out that the ladies always get the side of the bed that is farthest from the door?

    Must be one of those unconscious protection / instinct things...


    Sent from my DROIDX

  8. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by atctimmy View Post
    Friend let me make this clear. I don't care what you are about and you don't need character witnesses to prove it. You're the guy who was pointing a gun at your lady friend so the person who needs the answer is you.

    "Rebuke a wise man, and he will love thee" King Solomon (the wisest man to ever live)

    Mr Miller man when I said that you need to consider "what you are about" I meant that you need to sit down and think about where you want to go from here. You need to think about what happened and why. You need to think about goals. You need to think about your values.

    What are the goals of your life? What are you protecting? Why do you have a gun? What about safety?

    These are questions only you can answer. Good luck.
    Roger That, buddy!
    tcox4freedom and atctimmy like this.
    -Bark'n
    Semper Fi


    "The gun is the great equalizer... For it is the gun, that allows the meek to repel the monsters; Whom are bigger, stronger and without conscience, prey on those who without one, would surely perish."

  9. #53
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    The very reason I don't have a gun within arm's reach when I sleep. My dreams are too realistic to have a firearm too handy.
    Retired USAF E-8. Remember: You're being watched!
    Paranoia strikes deep, into your heart it will creep. It starts when you're always afraid... "For What It's Worth" Buffalo Springfield

  10. #54
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    I'm not going to join the blame game as I don't see it serving a purpose in this instance.
    Answering the OP's request for comments/suggestions. Some call that blame; others, responsibly considering the situation and ramifications. Discussion about weak points and possibilities for improvement, along with reflection, is where learning comes from.
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
    Explain: How does disarming victims reduce the number of victims?
    Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos).
    NRA, SAF, GOA, OFF, ACLDN.

  11. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by atctimmy View Post
    So after further review are you about safety or are you about laziness?
    Ok, I understand, makes sense. I would like to think I am and will strive to be about saftey. I am not a lazy person. I will put in the time and effort to form a better plan, practice it and use it going forward.
    The stupidity of some people NEVER ceases to amaze me.

    G19 AIWB

  12. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by l1a1 View Post

    Regardless of what you do, GET AS MUCH TRAINING as you can bear. Read as much information about self defense as you can from reputable sources and practice a procedure that you will follow in the future. Figure out your Things that go bump in the night routine and practice and drill it until it is second nature. Use an airsoft, blue gun, whatever. Might not be a bad idea. People only respond in crisis to the highest level of training that they have mastered.
    Really good advice. Thank you, this will be my new goal. I have really come to respect most of the people's opions and advice from my reading on this site. This is why I posted this. Thank you for responses, some is a little harsh, lol, but all of it is worth taking in and learning from.
    The stupidity of some people NEVER ceases to amaze me.

    G19 AIWB

  13. #57
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    If I had done this, I would at the very least retire my firearm until I work out a system that 1) prevented me from grabbing my firearm while I'm half asleep and 2) established ground rules for announcing when a friendly comes home. Most of what people have already said.

    You almost killed your the woman you live with and the mother of a young child. Retire the gun until you know you are ready to bring it back into your security scheme. Right now you are not ready.

    I wouldn't worry about being "unprotected." Seems like the risk of death, in your situation, is higher with the gun than without.

    Not what you want to hear, but you asked for opinions. Work out a multi-point plan that doesn't have a single point failure. Good luck.
    Bark'n likes this.

  14. #58
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    Hm. Well thanks for posting this. Not just you, but maybe other people can learn from this too. As you are aware, you should not be drawing on friends, family, loved ones, or anybody else you don't want to kill.

    Having thought about this myself, I decided a nightstand gun wasn't exactly what I need. I want the gun close at hand, but not where I might grab it in some half-asleep fugue state. Here's the Tiger holster system:



    The metal plate runs about 2.5 feet under the mattress, and the holster secures to it. As you can see, the SR9c is positioned right behind my head. To get it, I pretty much would have to get out of bed, but it's right there. If attacked in this room, the assailant wouldn't know it's there and my chance of getting to it is acceptable.

    You know the old joke about the guy who dreams he hears the phone ringing, picks up the handset and blows his head off? Or the statistic that having a gun in the home increases the chance of somebody being shot? You have to mitigate that, and this is how I'm doing it. You don't have to do it this way, but it's how I'm managing it. Actimmy said everything else I wanted to say, but this is a coda to that.

    On my nightstand I do have a Smith & Wesson Galaxy 13, with a red and white beam available. This is a nice tactical light because you can go with the red beam and not wake up your partner, nor readily reveal your position while still having enough light to maneuver.
    "It may seem difficult at first, but everything is difficult at first."

  15. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by miller_man View Post
    Ok, I understand, makes sense. I would like to think I am and will strive to be about saftey. I am not a lazy person. I will put in the time and effort to form a better plan, practice it and use it going forward.
    Good job. Being safety conscious can be tedious but in the end it will save your life.
    Mark Twain:
    The government is merely a servant -- merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a
    patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.

  16. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by S3NTYN3L View Post
    Has anyone else ever noticed that it works out that the ladies always get the side of the bed that is farthest from the door?

    Must be one of those unconscious protection / instinct things...
    Yep, always noticed that too.... not my choice, was always hers. I've noticed too, that one dog will always sleep on the corner of my bed nearest the door, and the other on the floor.... between the bed and the door. Even switched the bedroom around several times for the heck of it ..... and they always went to the point between myself and the door, wherever that was.
    tcox4freedom likes this.
    I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. --- Will Rogers ---
    Chief Justice John Roberts : "I don't see how you can read Heller and not take away from it the notion that the Second Amendment...was extremely important to the framers in their view of what liberty meant."

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