Violence at my company party - Page 2

Violence at my company party

This is a discussion on Violence at my company party within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; At the same time this also falls into the "If your only tool is a hammer every problem is a nail" category. Your only tool ...

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Thread: Violence at my company party

  1. #16
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    At the same time this also falls into the "If your only tool is a hammer every problem is a nail" category. Your only tool was a gun so the only choice you saw was draw or don't draw. Luckily you were not there though. It is foolish to only carry the highest level of force escalation and nothing else. I have my pepperspray whenever I have my gun specifically because there are gray areas where force is warranted but lethal force is not.
    Hi Musketeer,
    Please quote me where I stated my gun was the only means of defense at my disposal and my only solution.
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa


  2. #17
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    One question Betty that comes to mind is, is there a chance this creep could show up at your work someday with a gun? Something your work may have to consider.
    That's actually a situation we've run across in the past. I've worked at that place for six years, and during my first year there, I had a nasty ex-boyfriend threaten us (why he included my co-workers I have no idea) at the same time an unsavory co-worker was fired. That former employee decided to threaten my boss, claiming he'd "bring his shotgun." So because of those guys, we got a keypad entry system on the door.... that my receptionist has the key remote for.

    My boss has told her that her boyfriend is not to attend any company functions. He left before I could corner him to ask about other security measures. He won't escape me tomorrow.

    We have four entrances to our offices. One is permanently locked, the main has the keypad, the third locks after you shut it, and the other is open. I had tried to get my boss to keep that fourth door locked and make everybody filter through the main keypad door, but it was too "inconvenient" for those who didn't want to walk a few steps around the building or use a key to get in the third door. So I've taken it upon myself to lock it when I walk by.

    "Didn't you hear me pounding on the door?"
    "Nope."
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa

  3. #18
    VIP Member Array Rob72's Avatar
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    Two words: palm sap. If you know how to use it, the subject of your affection will keel over, and you can put on a good show of "attending to him", with a comment like, "Oh, jeez! He's passed out, someone call 911!" I've seen an SO do this, and the GF was immediately engrossed in watching over BF, and she thought it was sooo nice of the SO to call us (EMS) over......

  4. #19
    Senior Member Array Musketeer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Betty View Post
    Hi Musketeer,
    Please quote me where I stated my gun was the only means of defense at my disposal and my only solution.
    My apologies. Since you had started this with concerns about being present, packing and what you would have done I had inferred, by your lack of reference to other options, that you had none handy.

    To those who advocate no involvement I respect your position. Especially in the case of a domestic dispute. While I would never go into another person's home to invovle myself in their dispute and tend to advocate avoiding involving oneself in third party disputes I do draw the line when it is happenning in public and is perfectly plain to all observers what is happenning. If a man is going to proceed to beat the tar out of a defenseless woman in public damn straight I am going to hose him down with pepperspray while waiting for the authorities. At the same time I will be watching the female very carefully and if she is dumb enough come to her abuser's defense against me she is going to get the same. I cannot however assume that the woman getting her face beat in is automatically going to attack me for stopping her attacker and therefore ignore her plight. That is my decision though and others are certainly justified in having a different one.

  5. #20
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    Rob72,
    I'd love to have a palm sap, but unfortunately, saps/slapjacks aren't legal here in TN.... which is almost comical, because I'm ASP certified.
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa

  6. #21
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    Domestic violence is a two faced demon. First the person is getting beat up and then they make excuses for the person that kicked their ass.

    You can intervene, but odds are once you save the person from being hurt... they are going to crawfish on you and you could find yourself in real trouble.

    This time it was at a party with other witnesses around. Imagine if you broke up the fight in a dark parking lot and had to hurt or even worse shoot the aggressor. It is possible and very probable that both persone would turn against you and you would be seen as the criminal. Oh and you had a gun on you at the time.

    In this situation I would call the police and wait. Now if the BG has a weapon or is likely to kill the other person then you would have a choice to make.
    Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft!

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  7. #22
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    Domestic Violence situations are a no-win sitation for everyone involved. I hate them, you never know what to expect. Until the law was changed if the abused party did not want to press charges, the whole thing was bascially swept under the carpet and they were told that if the police were called again, someone would go to jail.

    Now, any officer that witnesses abuse or the evidence of abuse can press charges against the abuser, as often times the abuser will not for fear of further abuse at a later time.

    Even so, I am amazed at the battered women that persist in defending the actions of their "man". They say how much they love them and how he didnt mean it or they constantly make excuses. I know that sometimes it seems like a hopeless situation for an abused person, but the only way they can ever stop the abuse is to take the first step themselves.

    Domestic Violence is the number one killer of Police. I sincerley hope that anyone that chooses to jump into a situation like that understands that and how dangerous and volatile it can be.
    I would rather stand against the cannons of the wicked than against the prayers of the righteous.


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  8. #23
    Senior Member Array tegemu's Avatar
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    It might not be too late for someone who witnessed it, to report it.
    People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence in their behalf. - George Orwell

  9. #24
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    When I was riding on patrol with a sheriff's deputy buddy (I rode because often he was the only "unit" on duty so there was no back-up) the closest I came to getting killed was by the wife at a domestic dispute. We were subduing the husband and I saw her backing out of a bedroom with a pump shotgun, we had just cuffed hubby and I charged down the hall and body slammed her before she got the barrel clear of the door frame. It was loaded, 3 in the tube and a round chambered, I am not sure but I think I heard her chambering the round is what made me look up.

    Unless death is imminent STAY OUT OF IT I heard one time that domestic disputes are at the top of the list of calls that get cops killed, usually by the wife/GF while fighting with the abuser.

  10. #25
    Senior Member Array Musketeer's Avatar
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    I agree, domestics are the pitts. At the same time I don't know how I could sit back and watch a sever beating take place where the aggressor and victim are both perfectly identifiable and NOT do something. I could just see myself at the woman's funeral saying "I could have helped but I didn't know if she would be angry at me."

    In the scenario given at the start of this I would have to intervene as I had described. At the same time I know women who are/were in abusive relationships and I wasn't going to drive to their house to deal with it.

    If I would intervene to stop a rape how then could I not intervene in a severe beating? What a lousy scenario...

  11. #26
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    I am sure if I were there I would have engaged somehow and stopped the attack after making sure that police were on the way. More than likely if he was used to beating up on a woman he would not care too much for a full grown man to step in.

    What I am waiting to hear is all those that post on this forum that say, if they aren't willing to protect themselves, to hell with them. If my life isn't in danger I am not going to help, and so on.

    Sorry, but that ain't the way I think, I guess if we all thought that way it would really be a cold world.
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  12. #27
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    I have a policy against getting involved in DV situations ... too often you set yourself up for trouble. However as the situation was described I figure if I and a couple other guys were to pull the boyfriend off her and hold him until the situation was diffused (and/or the police arrived) I'd probably do that.

    My co-worker, the victim of the beating, immediately took the side of her boyfriend and defended him.
    Whoa Brother
    Last edited by Zundfolge; October 26th, 2006 at 09:21 PM.

  13. #28
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    Once, when I was young and dumb, I was in a bar where a guy started beating his "ole lady" and I decided to intervine. Bad mistake! I took him down and the next thing I knew, she was on my back trying to kill me.

    Never again! Chances are, he's beaten her before and if she doesn't have enough sense to get out, it aint my problem. I won't risk life and limb to protect someone who doesn't have sense enough to protect themselves again. That may sound cold, but I learned a long time ago that you can't save everybody.

    I would call the cops or security, or if I had someone who would restrain her, then maybe I might intervine, but I doubt it.

    It's a sad situation for sure.
    Last edited by sgtD; October 26th, 2006 at 09:41 PM. Reason: 'cause I wanted to change something
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  14. #29
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    Non intervention is the best policy to insure your own loved ones get to see you again. there is a reason PD go in force to domestic disputes. Unless the victim unconscious or immobile , chances are they will turn on you.
    "In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock." Thomas Jefferson


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  15. #30
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    I sure do hope your receptionist gets away from him soon.
    That situation never gets any better.

    When alcohol brings out beating of a woman then that person is very dangerous.

    I'm glad you missed that excitement because those abusers usually very easily transfer that sicko anger right over to any person that interferes.

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