A Friends Violent Boyfriend

This is a discussion on A Friends Violent Boyfriend within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; I hope he and his survive the night...if so, then all of the above would be good advice for him to follow. Good Luck!...

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Thread: A Friends Violent Boyfriend

  1. #46
    Senior Member Array DrLewall's Avatar
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    I hope he and his survive the night...if so, then all of the above would be good advice for him to follow. Good Luck!

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  3. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by broknindarkagain View Post
    Here is the story behind my first post.

    This poor girl allows for her boyfriend to handle her bills and money. She had given him the rent money for October but it never got paid. As to what happen to the money, no one knows. I got an eviction notice on the door so I called her. She got mad and told her boyfriend to go pay it. He didn't pay it, a week or so later the constable showed up at the door serving eviction court papers. I talked to the boyfriend about it and he said it would be taken care of.

    It wasn't taken care of so today I called the girl. She talked to her boyfriend about it. Shortly after he called here, I didn't pick up. I instead let him leave a message on the voice mail because I knew just what it would be. Threats.

    He said he was on his way to "knock my block off". He also indicated that he would harm my pregnant finance. What a man huh? I picked up the phone after I listened to the message and called 911...still waiting for the police to show up...Its been near 30 minutes since I called, this is kind of sad. I pray to God that they show up before the disgruntled boyfriend shows up. I really don't want to have to open fire on someone.

    Sounds like a case you see on Judge Judy! And not a way to live your life, btw...

    Do the right thing for yourself and whoever it is you live with and make new living arrangements!

    This thing of paying rent to someone who in turn has someone else pay someone else and all that crap is a crazy and screwy set up that just begs for disputes.

    Sounds like you have a hell of a mess involved with a lot of inmature people.

    I carry a gun and with that, as far as I'm concerned is the responsibility to not associate with people of that caliber. Just my crazy opinion.

    I would find a new place to live and hope I don't have to end up killing some idiot in the mean time!

    JMO... YMMV
    -Bark'n
    Semper Fi


    "The gun is the great equalizer... For it is the gun, that allows the meek to repel the monsters; Whom are bigger, stronger and without conscience, prey on those who without one, would surely perish."

  4. #48
    Member Array broknindarkagain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bark'n
    This thing of paying rent to someone who in turn has someone else pay someone else and all that crap is a crazy and screwy set up that just begs for disputes
    Nah, its not that complicated. I had the rent to the girl whos name the lease is under. These complications happened because she decided to give it to her boyfriend to take care of. Obviously, he didn't take care of it.

    At the time when I took this apartment, I didn't have any other choices. It was either this or the street. I know that its not a great situation to be in, but I didn't think that it would get out of hand like this.

    I'm working on finding something else as far as living arrangements go. I've had chances to get out over the past several months, but things were going fine. I didn't want to leave some innocent girl hanging with a lease that she is responsible for paying. When I moved in, she moved and signed a new lease elsewhere...And I don't think she feels like paying for two places. Its come to the point now where she isn't going to have a choice.

    Today I'm going to the court to file a restraining order against this guy. If he is really hell bent on doing anything, it may scare him out of it.

    Quote Originally Posted by DrLewall
    I hope he and his survive the night...if so, then all of the above would be good advice for him to follow. Good Luck!
    Thanks Drlewall. So far everyone has lived through the night...nothing has happened.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rivers
    It may even be that the original tenant has violated her lease by subletting it to you without management's approval. That would allow management to immediately void her lease, evict you and lease the apartment out to someone new. If you show management that you are an asset to their property (taking exceptional care of the apartment, being very courteous to other tenants, paying rent always on time, etc.), they may give you the opportunity to turn things around.
    Thats great advise. I haven't thought of that. I'll give that a shot, but only when I have something else lined up just in case it fails.



    If this guy comes here looking for trouble I'm going to call 911 immediately. Should I tell them that I'm armed and I will start shooting if I need to? Would that help get them there faster? Here in Austin, their response time is terrible. Today I waited for close to an hour for the police to arrive after I told them that this guy claimed he was on his way and threatened both my pregnant finance and I. How can I get them to respond to a situation that can potentially be deadly a bit faster?
    "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

    Smith & Wesson M&P9c

  5. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by broknindarkagain View Post
    Today I'm going to the court to file a restraining order against this guy. If he is really hell bent on doing anything, it may scare him out of it.
    Once it's filed, follow up with the Sheriff's department's criminal division frequently to ensure it gets served. One would think the system would do the right thing and do it efficiently, but you might be surprised. We had an order filed and after about a week, found out that the Sheriff's department hadn't made any attempt to serve it. We researched the address of the guy who was to be served and had to feed this address to the deputy and nag him to even get him to do anything. Hopefully, this won't be an issue for you, but don't assume. Good luck.

  6. #50
    Senior Member Array DrLewall's Avatar
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    Call 911 and at least report the intrusion..then if you have to shoot the guy, call them back and tell them so and see how fast they will get there!

  7. #51
    Member Array Dan M.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by broknindarkagain View Post
    I completelky understand what you're saying and its not harsh at all. Its the truth. I have learned a lot over the years and I am working on cleaning up my past mistakes.

    Unfortunately due to my mistakes in the past, I'm stuck in terrible neighborhoods. Owning a firearm is not a responsibility that I don't think I can handle. If stuff hits the fan, I want to be able to defend myself, my finance, and my child.
    This is a mature response. I have good hope for you, broknin. Best wishes and please continue with updates.

  8. #52
    VIP Member Array Rob99VMI04's Avatar
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    I actually had this situation well closes.

    My fiance's old roomate (who owned the apartment) through parties everynight.

    People were constantly there sleeping on the floor and the foton. Well one night I get a call at 2:3) saying one of the drunk guys was breaking into her room. Apparently, he knocked on her door wanting to ask her a question.

    As soon as she opened he came barging in. She actually pulled a broom on him.

    Apparently he was trying to make out with her. She called me histerical.

    I went over there only upon getting to the apartment I found that there where abour 4 cop cars trying to locate her appartment. Appartently, the police had been called to a bunch of underage drinkers(the roomates sister goes to JMU). I called my fiance and said put the owner on, and told her about what was outside. Told her about the cops. I gave the guy the benefit cause he was smashed but if he would have tried it with me he would have been hurting.
    “Are you a thermometer or a thermostat, do you reflect or become what is happening in the room or do you change the atmosphere, reset the temperature when you come into the room”?--Chuck Swindoll

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  9. #53
    Member Array Troy Price's Avatar
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    When a group of people, who have threated you with bodily harm, have the opportunity, ability, and intent (expressed in threats in this case) to do you serious bodily harm, even though they are unarmed you have the right to use deadly force (check your local laws). Especially after "letting themselves in" in the middle of the night.

    If they do not reside there, they do not have the right to be there without permission.

    Bang.
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  10. #54
    Distinguished Member Array P7fanatic's Avatar
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    Cool

    Quote Originally Posted by broknindarkagain View Post

    Here in Austin,
    Oh my. Make sure you cross your t's and dot your i's. Your DA is a liberal Ronnie Earle and I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him.
    I'm from Austin and I know he's quite a defender of illegal aliens. Not sure of his opinions on 2nd Amendment.
    I'd think about taking over the lease but try and line up a co-signer just in case.
    Good luck.


    "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance." -Thomas Jefferson

    "Liberalism is a Mental Disorder." -Michael Savage

    GOOD Gun Control is being able to hit your target! -Myself

  11. #55
    Member Array broknindarkagain's Avatar
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    I've heard some bad things about the DA here... Hopefully I'll never have to deal with that.

    This dude continues to call my house. Saying that he will come and things like that. I'm saving all the voice mails. He hasn't shown up yet. He isn't too happy about me calling the police yesterday. He is the type of person that will say "be a man and fight, don't be a *****". Little does he know, getting the police involved may have saved his life. I'm hoping these messages that he has left on my phone and the threats help with a restraining order.

    I was going to get a protection order today, but I wasn't able to make it up to the court.
    "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

    Smith & Wesson M&P9c

  12. #56
    VIP Member Array peacefuljeffrey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SIGguy229 View Post
    "Get out"

    events unfold

    Call 911: "Send police and an ambulance...four men have been shot...the address is....."

    Call atty
    The way Massad Ayoob runs through it in drills on Personal Defense TV, he pretty much shouts out the address as the first thing he says. The 911 dispatcher pretty much knows that no matter what the reason, he's got to be sending police to a location. The sooner he gets that information--particularly without having to ask for it--the sooner they can be sent on the way.

    Once you've said where the police have to go, you get to saying what happened, who and how many are involved, whether they are still there, who you are, what they/you look like, etc.

    And yeah, I've called 911 on minimal stuff before, and even when it's not life-or-death, it can get kinda hard to organize your thoughts, speak clearly, remember details...

  13. #57
    VIP Member Array Redneck Repairs's Avatar
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    Its not a fun place to be , and from the sounds of things moving may not be a " voluntary "choice tho eviction has started so it may be involuntary . None the less i urge the original poster to change his circumstances . Talk to the Landlord and see if possibly you can trade some work for the deposits ect.. to get the lease in your name . DO change locks where no one but you , and if required ( likely to be ) the landlord has a key . Restraining orders are fine documents issued by courts with the best intentions , however even otherwise law abiding rednecks will ignore them as a matter of course ( think of them as school zones and other places where by only the most law abiding among us are at a disadvantage ) . IMHO this situation has deteriorated to the point that you are faced with two choices .. 1. leave , just get gone to another home by whatever means . or 2. have a concise conversation with all involved about how the apt is now your home ( understand this may well involve violence and making bond on your part ) . Your restraining order is a great document that will work if it is allowed to , i dont expect that , in fact i expect it to enable his stupid thinking and have another visit . It is handy in that if he respects law he will obey it , and that if he doesn't then you have a record of fear of him as to motive shooting him to defend yourself/family . ( mods i know that statement is close to the line but it is factual as far as that counts ) . For whatever reason you have now run up against an animal who respects little but his own pain/welfare and you must deal with that .. see suggestion 1 above bud its cheaper .
    Make sure you get full value out of today , Do something worthwhile, because what you do today will cost you one day off the rest of your life .
    We only begin to understand folks after we stop and think .

    Criminals are looking for victims, not opponents.

  14. #58
    Distinguished Member Array BIG E's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by QKShooter View Post
    I totally agree with ExSoldier.
    If you are renting then that is your home.
    Nobody should be able to gain entry into your home without your consent and permission. Have your locks rekeyed...do something pro-active right now.
    Absolutely...you should be adding a dead-bolt to the door or you should physically bar your doors so that no unauthorized person/persons can enter your living quarters uninvited.
    For all you know 6 previous tenants could also have your apartment door key.
    An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of Lead.
    While it likely that it would be a good shoot if strangers entered your domicile at night and threatened you...why would you let the situation get to that point? You can easily rectify things right now so that you'll not need to face that future scenario.
    +1 Well said.

    Rekey and get on the defensive.

    If it happens again well.....
    Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft!

    -- Theodore Roosevelt --

  15. #59
    Senior Member Array SilenceDoGood's Avatar
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    I was at my old appartment complex visiting a friend, and she said "I still have your old appt key". I said, "huh, wonder if it still works" so we went and knocked on the door and the new tennenates answered. We explained to them that we used to live there and we had a key, and we were curious if it still worked... needless to say they were curious as well. It worked (duh) so we surrendered the key to the new owners and advised them to change the locks ASAP.
    "A government is like fire, a handy servant, but a dangerous master." -- George Washington

  16. #60
    Member Array broknindarkagain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SilenceDoGood View Post
    I was at my old appartment complex visiting a friend, and she said "I still have your old appt key". I said, "huh, wonder if it still works" so we went and knocked on the door and the new tennenates answered. We explained to them that we used to live there and we had a key, and we were curious if it still worked... needless to say they were curious as well. It worked (duh) so we surrendered the key to the new owners and advised them to change the locks ASAP.
    I've done the same thing in the past. Apartments claim that they change the keys, but they never do
    "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

    Smith & Wesson M&P9c

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