approached in the parking lot today...

[jahwarrior72]

...just an hour ago. i needed to buy a few things for my daughter's birthday party tomorrow afternoon: cake mix, napkins, and candy. i bought my stuff, and went out to my van. i got in my van, and started to look at my receipt. a guy i noticed earlier in the store saw me as i saw him; he changed direction and walked towards my van. i nodded to him, acknowledging that i'd seen him. he stopped about 20 feet from my van, and asked if i could spare a cigarette. i said no. he looked at me, then said "you ain't got a cigarette?" i repeated myself, then added that i quit last month.

he looked at me, then grinned. "c'mon, man. you ain't got a smoke?" he started walking towards me again, at which time i told him, pretty frenchly, to stop, and stay away from my van.

"or what?" he laughed, putting a hand in his pocket. i had drawn my gun from its holster when he asked the second question. now, i held it
against the steering wheel, where he could see it. i told him, in french, to get away from my van, and that i wasn't going to tell him again.

he took his hand from his pocket, holding a set of keys. "sorry, man, uhhh...sorry. i'm sorry.." he walked backwards for about 10 feet, then turned and took off. an elderly security guard (unarmed) for the store came over, and asked if i was okay. i said "sure," then left.

my stomach is still queasy. i know i made a few mistakes, like not starting the car as soon as i got in it. also, i think i should have had store security call the police, but i was tired, and just wanted to get home. good night, everyone.

[DefensiveCarry.com]

[Eagleks]

sorry... to me sounds like over-reaction, and unless you have a life threatening situation... the gun should never have come out. I'm afraid here, it could have ended you up in jail for brandishing a weapon.

[Ivan4x4]

as far as I can see, you did well, nobody got hurt and you keeped your cool,altho here in texas that is branising a weapon.





i

[ExactlyMyPoint]

I JUST listened to a podcast on parking lot safety. People just don't approach you like that without bad intentions. Me thinks he was trying to rob you. Should you have drawn your weapon? Hmmmm. Hard to say. HE put his hand in his pocket first. He probably had a weapon AND his car keys there. Did it work out for the best? I think so. You probably should have called the police. But you and he both went home and nobody was hurt. Calm down. Take a couple of deep breaths and be thankful that it worked out OK.

[Eagleks]

Are you JOKING...... you've never been approached by the homeless or others in the parking lots for a cigarette.. a light ... a couple of bucks ?? Happens all of the time.

[BikerRN]

Brush up on your verbal skills and confrontational avoidance tactics is my suggestion. What you typed is admisiion to Disorderly Conduct (misdemeanor), Brandishment of a Deadly Weapon (misdemeanor) and if he felt threatened, Aggravated Assault (felony) here.

The last one is a bit of a "stretch" but you would get charged with it to give the prosecutor some "bargaining power".

Biker

[sniper58]

Are you JOKING...... you've never been approached by the homeless or others in the parking lots for a cigarette.. a light ... a couple of bucks ?? Happens all of the time.

Most of us have. Complacency is what gets GG's killed. I don't think I would have shown my weapon. It would have been drawn and ready (with the engine running and the vehicle in gear) but I wasn't there. I know my awareness has been heighted since carrying and while I expect to be approached "by the homeless or others," it won't be a casual conversation.

[ccw9mm]

Are you JOKING...... you've never been approached by the homeless or others in the parking lots for a cigarette.. a light ... a couple of bucks ?? Happens all of the time.

And a couple of the times I've been approached, the instigators were absolutely BG's. In one case, I physically disallowed my beating. In the second case, I drew down on a two-on-one coordinated attack on me. Each started with the "bum a smoke?" line. Fortunately for me, in each case the moment it went sideways I was anticipating it due to all the little hairs standing up on my neck and arms. It couldn't have been anything else, in those two instances. It was night and day, as compared to garden-variety "bum a smoke?" situations.

Happens somewhat less frequently, but it happens. That's no joke.

Now, I wasn't there in this case. It's situation dependent. Depends on the body language, the eyes, whether those little hairs are telling you you've just heard the pin drop but aren't yet registering the threat. Depends on what's said, how it's said, how it's combined with the walk, how quickly that walk cuts the distance between you. Put all that together, and some situations are just screaming out as dangerous. I wasn't there.

Apparently, the O.P. thought it looked, smelled and felt dangerous. The law allows that, if it's articulable and reasonable. Reason dictates that, since it does happen to blow sideways with fair frequency, that one's personal view of all the indicators can be reasonably interpreted in this way. The law supports that, assuming it's articulable. NOBODY is legally forced to withstand close-quarters, aggressive contact with someone after "No!" has been indicated and the "...or what?" threats combine with up-to-no-good body language and demeanor. Nobody.

Complacency is what gets GG's killed. I don't think I would have shown my weapon. It would have been drawn and ready ...

About what I would have done, as well. Unknown if the car was turned on or in gear. Unknown if it could have been quickly put into that condition, given the speed/aggressiveness with which the person was closing the distance. Better to be safe.

[dukalmighty]

All that guy has to do is call 911 and say you pointed a gun at him after he asked you for a cigarette and you are going to jail

[ccw9mm]

All that guy has to do is call 911 and say you pointed a gun at him after he asked you for a cigarette and you are going to jail

Only if the threat is not articulable and reasonable.

[BikerRN]

Only if the threat is not articulable and reasonable.

You can "articulate" all you want, but the OP would be doing it from a jail cell here, and this is a "gun friendly" location.

Sorry Virginia, but there is no Santa Claus. You cannot threaten somebody and then flee the scene without calling your local Constabulary and expect us to believe you were a victim. The first one to call it in is the victim, the other actor is the perpetrator of the crime.

Biker

[ccw9mm]

The first one to call it in is the victim, the other actor is the perpetrator of the crime.

Not so. Not hardly. You're telling me that if I call in 2 seconds later, I'm a perpetrator, merely because of timing? Malarky. If you can substantiate that opinion with a statute, then we'll have something to discuss. (I'm not speaking of probabilities of being hauled in to explain. I'm speaking of a statute that dictates that the second caller becomes a perp. Doesn't exist.)

I'll grant that the first one on base gets the first call, but it doesn't change the facts of the threat. It merely makes it harder to get a word in edgewise. Have been there, as second reporter. It ain't pretty. But it hardly makes one guilty of a crime for stopping the crime of the real perp.

[Skygod]

Are you JOKING...... you've never been approached by the homeless or others in the parking lots for a cigarette.. a light ... a couple of bucks ?? Happens all of the time.

Several years ago some of the guys and myself where on the strip club hunt one evening. We finally decided on a rather seedy club and I found a parking space right off tothe right hand side of the entrance. As I pulled into the space we saw a homeless looking dude sitting there in front of storefront with a bag looking really destitute.

As I got out of the truck he asked "He man gotta smoke" to which I supplied him with a smoke and a light. Alls good, me and boy's go into the strip club and have one drink then decide it's too damn poor of strip club to spend any money. So we left.

Upon approaching my truck I noticed the butt of that cigarette on the hood of my truck and it wasn't just thrown it was ground out on my hood. WTH ? I give him a smoke, and a light and he's got the balls or the psychopathology to decide my truck deserved it or I deserved it. No one had left the strip club before and here this dude is sitting there with his bag.

It get's better. I dismiss the cigarette butt on my hood with some finger pointing and a few curse words towards him. Upon starting the truck and starting to back out of the space it's apparent that all my tires are now FLAT !!!!

In his drunken state and or psycopathology he cut all four valve stems of my tires.

He just sat there and lauphed. Funny enough he was sitting right in the place that we left him.

We got a police that was driving by, but no joy because none of us actually saw him cut the valve stems. He did get arrested for having chipped away at the lock in the door of the lawyers office he was sitting in front off though.

I'm done giving out cigs to strangers in parking lots.

[jdsumner]

"i got (in my van), and started to look at my receipt. a guy i noticed earlier in the store saw me as i saw him; he changed direction and walked towards my van."-jahwarrior72

Again, I'm not there, so no judgement made on my part. But, IF you began to feel 'iffy', why not start the van and drive off?

Dan

[bandit383]

I too think she could be arrested for brandishing but glad it turned out in her favor. But it is an intersting point though...what to do if you were not in the van/car and a homeless person looking for a handout comes walking towards you and when you warn them, they just laugh and keep coming.

Rick