July 7th, 2008 12:25 AM
I just finished a long drive today and witnessed a couple pulled-over and it looked like they were arguing. Obviously, there is no good reason to get involved in a situation like this so I motored by happily. But it got me thinking about a scenario..
Suppose you are on an isolated stretch of road (farmland, desert, woods, whatever) and up ahead you see a man and a woman arguing on the side of the road. He is a good deal larger than the woman. As you approach, the man slugs the woman hard and she goes down. Its obvious she's hurt and he's making moves like he is going to keep going on hitting her.
Almost every one of us will agree that getting involved in outside disputes is never a good idea because we can never be sure of what is going on. But at what point do you get involved in a situation like this? Or do you even consider it? Or are there just too many variables?
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July 7th, 2008 12:37 AM
There are alot of variables.
All I can say is that I will do what feels "right" at the time.
Having experience in domestic disputes and seeing the damage both physically and mentally that takes place, I know that not intervening can be deadly.
I have also marveled at the fact that people refused to get involved when someone was getting pounded into the dirt and it was obviously one sided and even written about it on this forum.
A heated verbal argument is one thing. The use of physical force is another.
No matter, intervening is about as dangerous a situation that one can get in...even for uniformed cops. If one does intervene, they must tread very softly and be very, very aware.
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July 7th, 2008 12:41 AM
After I dial 911 and explain the situation, I'll decide on further action--more than likely -intervention. I wouldn't be able to sleep at night if I don't intervene in this situation. I'll try to be as tactful as I can be. All the while in the back of my mind-knowing that women seldom follow through with pressing charges against their male batterer and may take offense on the interruption of their pummeling. Matter of fact-they may become the aggressor to you.
July 7th, 2008 12:41 AM
A domestic dispute is one of those things that I try to avoid getting in the middle of.
A call to 911 one would definately be warranted, beyond that, I'd have to go with what my gut told me to do.
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July 7th, 2008 01:59 AM
I will call 911 and stop,I am not driving by while some guy is attacking a woman It might be a domestic It might be your sister or mom out for a walk and some guy sees an easy prey to rob or rape,If he approaches my car I will verbally tell him to stay where he is that police have been called,If he keeps coming then he meets Rocky my 1911,same goes for woman I don't know the situation so all I'm doing is seperating them stopping the attack and waiting for LEO if they both get in car and leave I will be pretty sure It's a domestic but I will call 911 and give them direction of travel with tag number which I will already have given and possibly follow until stopped by police
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July 7th, 2008 03:26 AM
Depends on your level of willing to get involved.
Take note of the location/time and call 911.
Continue on or stop and be a good witness.
I would not get involved other than verbally telling them that the police had been called.
If the physical abuse became extremely violent and/or involved another item other than fists, it may become necessary to become involved. Your actions at that point may be in defense of a life.
For instance, a bat, that can be a deadly weapon. It may be cold to say that I would actually wait for the other person to be hit with it. But that establishes intent. I don't know these people, what's common for them is beyond me. Just my opinion.
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July 7th, 2008 04:43 AM
I'm calling 911, beyond that is very touchy.
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July 7th, 2008 04:55 AM
Circumstantial... but if it's pretty clear that this woman is taking a serious beating, I don't know if I could stomach myself for driving on. Certainly 911 is first, almost certainly (I can see imminent death interrupting, like he's grabbing a machete out of his car or some such far-fetched scenario). If I were to intervene, it would at least start from afar (40 feet?) with a verbal warning, "The police are on their way. You'd be wise to leave her as is." Hand on pistol, but not obtrusively so.
If he keeps going, it becomes even more situational. Is he slapping her around or giving her brain damage? Is this a "I'm a man" &)*(@#$, or is he seriously unbalanced or homicidal? If it's a slap-around thing, I think I'd leave it at verbal and wait for the police. That suggests domestic problem and, as has been mentioned, a good chance of the woman leaving you out to dry.
If it seems more obviously threatening to her life or health, I am giving a stronger verbal command, keeping my distance. If I get the impression that she is in serious danger of real injury or death and it's clear that I am protecting the life and livelihood of the woman, I would probably draw and start moving closer (again, situational) -- if I have to shoot, I'd rather not do it from 40 feet. And if, after multiple commands, he's ignoring and looking to kill the woman (something like the horrible baby-pounding story where BG is intently focused on destroying a human life), I'm gonna stop the threat.
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July 7th, 2008 06:13 AM
July 7th, 2008 06:16 AM
I would call 911, then stop the car a discrete distance in front with my blinkers flashing. This way, they would see me and be alterted, but I would have time to depart if the situation warranted.
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-- Benjamin Franklin
July 7th, 2008 08:18 AM
I recognize the danger of domestic situations, and how victims sometimes turn on anyone who intervenes. I recognize how agitated the aggressor likely is, and how he would feel toward any intrusion. He would probably be ready to attack any intruder immediately.
"An isolated stretch of road" in the outlying counties around here could mean a 1-hour response time by the sheriff, even in an emergency. "An isolated stretch of road" in some parts of the city here has death written all over it.
If it's in the country, I don't think I'll be driving on by. If he's on top of her pounding her, my first thought will be to mace him in the face. If he's not on top of her yet, but standing and highly agitated, it's probably going to go downhill pretty quick. If the guy is also armed, I might be faced with a split-second choice of needing to shoot. Once I exit the vehicle, my life is on the line. But no, I don't think I'll be driving on by.
If it's in a bad part of the city, what am I doing there in the first place? Nothing good can happen in some parts of the city. If one stops, unseen gremlins sometimes filter out of blacked-out buildings. You could find yourself outnumbered 10 to 1 in about 5 seconds, and they wouldn't be asking you over for tea. Stopping in such an area may fill in your death certificate. Sounds cold, but I doubt I'll be stopping if I'm in East St. Louis, or other similar areas in St. Louis.
Very dangerous situations. If I did stop, I possibly just entered a life-and-death situation.
Dang it, SixBravo, why are you making me think this hard in the morning before my coffee?
July 7th, 2008 08:26 AM
Call 911, Leave line open on speaker phone if necessary. Make a u-turn and pull up aways behind with high beams on. This should get the guys attention that someone else is paying attention. If the beating continues then verbal warnings and mace.
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July 7th, 2008 10:10 AM
Perhaps you are witnessing an undercover cop arresting a Bonnie wanna' be (of Bonnie and Clyde).
I would stop a 'distance' away and call 911. I would yell, from a distance that the cops are on the way, and if one is a cop, they would hopefully identify that fact.
How many time has someone attempted to intervene and ended up with both the perp and vic attacking the Good Samaritan?
This is a very touchy situation, and without more facts it is very difficult to determine the exact approach...one would really have to be there.
Stay armed...dial 911 w/info...stay safe!
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July 7th, 2008 10:25 AM
definite call to 911....then be a witness.
How about this...
What if a weapon is produced....
...or gun (BTW...how do you know it isn't a UC LEO?)
- know the difference
is a fancy name for crappy fighter
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July 7th, 2008 12:52 PM
Like everyone else has said, call 911.
As for getting involved... what I recommend and what I am personally willing to do and why are two different things.
I know myself well enough to know that I could not stand by and watch this thing unfold and yes, I would get involved.
Yeah yeah, I know, (insert objections here) but I personally don't give a rodent's sphincter, I am NOT going to stand by and watch! That's just me.
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