How do you prevent this?

This is a discussion on How do you prevent this? within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Originally Posted by deadeye72 I normally don't park around other vehicles. We normally park out from the store. That's basically the only "correct" answer. Un-arse. ...

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Thread: How do you prevent this?

  1. #16
    VIP Member Array Rob72's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deadeye72 View Post
    I normally don't park around other vehicles. We normally park out from the store.
    That's basically the only "correct" answer. Un-arse. Walk. Proximity invites interaction. If you park two parking rows away from the rest of "the herd," and you see someone parked beside your car on exiting the business, you 1) have an alert, and 2) lots of time and distance to decide whether you want to ask for an escort, wait-n-see, or whathaveyou.

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  3. #17
    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Thank you all for your replies. I'm new enough at this that I don't know where to draw lines between watchfulness and paranoia.

    I'm going to start parking farther away in large lots -- when I can -- for all the good reasons listed here. Too bad it's 90+ degrees and 95% humidity for 6 months of the year down here.

    First do a threat assessment. These attacks can happen anywhere, but you are at an elevated risk in certain parts of town at certain places in town, at certain times of day.
    I think that's part of my problem. I live in a government-assisted apartment complex, and will for another year or two. (Long story.) I can certainly drive past our building and come around again. That's doable. But it's almost impossible not to part in the midst of other cars. I don't drive a truck or SUV, so I can't really see beyond any other cars. I grab my purse, keys, lunch stuff, mail, a book I read at lunch, plus 2 or 3 gallons of milk every other day, and lug it between 2 buildings up to my door. I can keep my head on a swivel, but if I had to draw, I would have to drop a bunch of stuff first. I'd lose.

    It is frustrating when I hear the men say "I always keep a hand free." It's a rare day when I have a hand free, and uncommon when I'm not loaded down with other stuff. [rant ended before it began.] And the times I actually have both hands free feel so weird that I almost feel undressed.

    ALWAYS park near a light after dark so you can see what's going on around you. Take your time about getting out. This will allow you to get all your "stuff" together. ALWAYS have your weapon handy, in your purse, holster, belt, whatever. Immediately survey your surroundings when you get out of the car. Nobody will surprise you, they may approach you but there will be time to react. Some advice that a lawman gave to me a long time ago. "Don't look like a victim and you probably won't be one!"
    There are little to no lights in our apartment parking lot, though I do try to park around lights when I'm elsewhere. But I've heard others say "DON'T take your time getting out. Get out of your car as quickly as you can; don't dawdle."

    I do look around when I get out. And I have my head on a swivel the whole way in between the buildings. It's that momentary time when you open the door and someone sticks a gun in your face that I fear.

    It's also frustrating when people say "have a way out when you're waiting in traffic." I drive a 4-lane (each) main street to work and back, 10 miles each. Unless you're at the front of the line, there IS NO way out if the SHTF. (sigh)

    I'm trying hard to be in condition yellow most of the time (though it's more difficult than I thought). So I don't think I look like a victim. But -- heh -- I was born a worrier, and I'll die a worrier.

    [Aside #1]
    A couple of weeks ago someone tried our doorknob at about 1:30 in the morning. Son and daughter were downstairs. Son grabbed his gun (which was a few feet away), but the dude walked off.

    Last night we lost power at about 10:15 p.m., and at 11:15 my 16-year-old daughter and I were walking out to my car with a laundry basket and small suitcase, to spend the muggy night at my ex-husband's house. (No jokes, please. My daughter let me sleep in her bed.) On the way out, one guy was loitering against a (his?) car trunk, watching us, and others were on their balcony, watching us. I felt like a spotlight was on us. I hated to leave the apt, figuring we'd get burgled while we were gone. (We didn't.)

    [Aside #2]
    This whole new mindset is hard to get used to. I wish I didn't have to. I wish my mother and sister wouldn't look at me and my sons as if we were weird, and tell us we don't have to have guns at *their* house, because they're not needed there. (Right!) I wish I didn't have to doubt and mistrust everyone I don't know, and some I do. It's not the way I've lived most of my life, and it makes me unhappy.

    [Aside #3]
    I was in the grocery store last night behind a 20-something woman-of-color and her young son (age 4?). He kept yelling "pick me up! pick me up!" and bumping into her, hard. She completely ignored him at first, then smacked him when she got tired of him. Never addressed his wants -- rightful or not. Hardly looked at him or talked to him. Not that his bad behavior should have been coddled. But she didn't address he behavior, tell him to behave, tell him she loves him but didn't have time to play now, Nothing. She did nothing but Ignore then Swat. He "screamed" then grinned back at me afterwards.

    This, to me, is just a microcosm of the problems we have with many people. The only kind of attention they get is the bad kind, and all they know how to understand is the bad kind, and that's all they dish out for the rest of their lives. It's not limited to race. I've seen "white trash" do it too. It seems to be cultural, and definitely passed down through the generations.

    I think parenting skills ought to be taught in school, since they're certainly not being taught at home. It's the most important job there is, and too many people are effing it up -- BADLY.

    [off my soapbox now.]
    (sigh)
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

  4. #18
    Member Array gotammo's Avatar
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    I have no patients for finding a close spot I choose open parking areas where most spots are open.

  5. #19
    VIP Member Array Eagleks's Avatar
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    I'm always ready getting in or out of a car. However, I think getting out is a lower risk time. When you are going to the car is higher risk, because they've had time to assess you as a victim, pace you to pick their time and spot..... etc.

    Normally, a BG will 'pick' his victim, or potential victim ahead of time and look for opportunity. Getting into a car is a more vulnerable time.

    I have a habit of carrying my keys with them between each finger.... an old habit... if I'm surprised and I smack someone in the face or throat... it's going to do some real damage and hurt like hell.

    Have you seen the "cat" . It's for women and girls. Looks like a figure of a cat's head for a key chain. However, two fingers go into the eyes, the head in the hand, and the ears...... are deadly pointed weapons... and no one would suspect it at all. My daughter wanted one just because she thought it was a cool figure of a cat's head , then I showed her what it was for..... then she really wanted one.

  6. #20
    Member Array titleist's Avatar
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    The way I figure it, unless you are about to get murdered with a gun from 10 or more feet away with no provocation...
    1. Get your purse or whatever in hand before you leave the vehicle (still with doors locked),
    2. Check in the all around,
    3. Right after checking your 11-6 o'clock, turn your head left and look in your side view mirror and to your 10-11 o'clock simultaneously,
    4. If that area is clear, get out, you should be clear from immediate close-contact threats, and have a delay to turn around once you get out of your car to see anyone approaching from the other side. Good to go.

    In summary, clear everything except the driver side of the car, then clear the drivers side immediately before getting out, should give you a bit of a cushion.

  7. #21
    VIP Member Array goldshellback's Avatar
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    Instincs (spidy-sense) is a wonderful thing. If your in condition yellow and something dosn't 'feel' right, keep going to another spot/location.

    A dedicated, motivated BG in that setting is hard enough to see, but developing habits like scanning/looking while preparing to exit you car are invaluable.
    "Just getting a concealed carry permit means you haven't commited a crime yet. CCP holders commit crimes." Daniel Vice, senior attorney for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, quoted on Fox & Friends, 8 Jul, 2008

    (Sometimes) "a fight avioded is a fight won." ... claude clay

  8. #22
    Member Array kayakersteve's Avatar
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    There have been several great responses here. One additional thing I have noted being a CCW'r for 22 years now is that people new to CCW often place themselves in more risky conditions because they have a weapon. As one becomes more seasoned (Wisdom comes with age), people tend to realize that a lethal confrontation is to be avoided as much as possible and tend to start being smarter about place they go and situations they get themselves into.

    I am a strong believer of using one's sixth sense - If something doesn't feel right, get out of that situation ASAP. The CCW portion comes into play if that something follows you or wants to engage. Typically, if a bad guy knows you are aware of his presence, he will pick another victim as they like to use the element of surprise to stack the odds in their favor - So be smart at all times.

    Check out Coopers color codes - There is real merit in this information.
    States of Awareness, the Cooper Color Codes

    Hope it helps, SteveB

  9. #23
    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eagleks View Post
    I'm always ready getting in or out of a car. However, I think getting out is a lower risk time. When you are going to the car is higher risk, because they've had time to assess you as a victim, pace you to pick their time and spot..... etc.
    That makes sense, with the exception of someone following you home to rob you in your driveway. I'm learning to be watchful when I go towards my car. It's getting out that's still worrisome.

    Have you seen the "cat" .
    No I haven't, but I'll keep an eye out for one. Is there a website for them?
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

  10. #24
    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by titleist View Post
    1. Get your purse or whatever in hand before you leave the vehicle (still with doors locked),
    Ah, but that's the hard part. Someone here suggested I get a backpack and put everything in it before I get home. I may have to do just that. I'm still going to be lugging a bunch of stuff, though, with a heavy purse, a heavy backpack, and a couple of gallons of milk or more. There's just no easy exit from my car when I'm getting home from work. Even the parking spaces are small, and I drive a Taurus.

    2. Check in the all around,
    3. Right after checking your 11-6 o'clock, turn your head left and look in your side view mirror and to your 10-11 o'clock simultaneously,
    4. If that area is clear, get out, you should be clear from immediate close-contact threats, and have a delay to turn around once you get out of your car to see anyone approaching from the other side. Good to go.
    I do try to do this. Guess it comes down to paranoia if I still worry about it....
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

  11. #25
    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Fortunately, at 53, I'm plenty old enough to stay out of troublesome areas, bars, and night clubs.

    My intuition of danger doesn't jangle very often, but I've learned to listen to it. I know (through that intuition) that one time I saved myself and my kids from a bad confrontation by bugging out when the hairs raised on my neck, instead of saying "No, it's really okay, you're being silly". That was several years ago.

    I think I realized a couple of days ago what some of you guys were trying to tell me. I was getting gas on the way to work, and keeping an eye out all around me while pumping the gas. I couldn't see behind the pump, of course, but I realized that THAT wasn't the point.

    The point was that just the fact that I was aware, and looking, and in condition yellow, any BG that was watching, and judging me as possible prey, would have seen that.

    It's not just what I do (be alert), but what I don't do (not be condn white). It's not just me who is affected by my alertness, it's the BG, too. It's a two-way-street kind of thing, like a wolf and prey non-verbal communication. Something in the deer's stance or eye or something, that says "I'm not the one you'll go after today."

    I don't have to be 100% safe when I'm out in the open, because the 75% that I can manage is (usually) enough to send the BG elsewhere.

    Hope I'm making sense.
    Do I have this part right?
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

  12. #26
    Senior Member Array MilitaryPower's Avatar
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    I always try and have the spot next my side of the car empty for one. I always look around before I pull in, looking for heads in the nearest cars and when I pull in and stop, I get out as fast as I can without looking like a madman, that way I can keep aware. And when I walk through the parking lot, I keep one hand in my pocket holding onto my little friend, the PPS (have to be careful how I write this next time, LOL). To get back into my car, I do the same, but opposite.
    Gun control can be blamed in part for allowing 9/11 to happen.
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  13. #27
    Senior Member Array dnowell's Avatar
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    One test of sorts that I do for myself is whether I notice people sitting in parked cars. When you park in a decent-size parking lot, you'll usually walk past somebody sitting in their parked car. If you're attentive, you'll notice it.

    When I stop noticing it, that cues me in that my situational awareness is too low. I'm not sure if others are similar, but "games" like this are key (to me) for keeping situationally aware even in places that feel and look safe.

  14. #28
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    I try to avoid lots at night. I always cruise any lot before selecting a spot. My head is on a swivel when exiting or entering my car. My door are locked before I even shut them. I look for movement in every direction. If possible I alway try to pull thru the spots so my front end is facing out...no backing out.

    Stay armed...be alert...stay safe!
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  15. #29
    Member Array 1911packer's Avatar
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    I try to park as close to the business entrance as possible. The number of witnesses thin out the greater the distance from the business, giving the BG a better opportunity to do his dirty deed unnoticed. The greater the distance to walk, the more time there is between the relative safety of the business and the car.

  16. #30
    Member Array LabTech's Avatar
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    i guess im the odd one.

    i like parking next to other cars.

    the close cars act as a funnel into a kill zone for turds.

    plus its a lot harder for someone who isnt involved to see me with a big glock in hand & if i ever have to shoot the cars wont leave anyplace for the bad guy to run.

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