What steps do you follow when harassed?

This is a discussion on What steps do you follow when harassed? within the Carry & Defensive Scenarios forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Hey all, fairly new here, but I've been reading through your great posts and trying to apply your thinking to some situations. So, I wanted ...

Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 60

Thread: What steps do you follow when harassed?

  1. #1
    Member Array Dieselnut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    120

    What steps do you follow when harassed?

    Hey all, fairly new here, but I've been reading through your great posts and trying to apply your thinking to some situations. So, I wanted to get your input on a situation that has happened to me in that past and I still think about.

    In the past, I've been harassed and "followed" by various up-to-no-good, gangster types. Keep in mind I try to avoid shady streets at all costs, but you never know where you may encounter these types. It starts with me walking by and them saying something to me, to get me to respond and/or confront them. I usually just keep walking and don't say anything. In the past I've been alone, but more recently I've been with my girlfriend.

    Usually it stops at a few shouts, but once two guys started following me, walking behind me, swearing at me and trying to start something. Since I was unarmed, I quickly made my way to a more populated area where they ceased to follow me. But, let's say I couldn't escape that quickly and I was alone, or worse, with my girl. How would you guys handle the situation?

    Obviously there are a LOT of factors here to consider. But at which point do you respond? At which point do you mention that you will call the cops? At which point do you actually call the cops? And lastly, at which point do you mention and prepare to draw your weapon? You may not know if they are armed at first, thanks to baggy jackets/pants, so that is obviously a big factor.

    I'm eager to hear your experienced opinions. Thanks!

  2. Remove Ads

  3. #2
    VIP Member Array farronwolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    4,767
    First avoid those areas at all cost if this is happening repeatedly.

    Second, don't interact with someone who is just out to jerk your chain.

    Third, you call the cops when you feel threatened, it is kinda hard to call them after you start to take a whooping. I don't mention that I am going to call the cops.

    Fourth, you don't mention that your going to draw your weapon. Either you draw it, or you don't, you don't need to talk about it. If you feel the need to draw your weapon you will know right then and there if they have a weapon. If they do you will see it, if they don't they will be holding their pants as high as they can while running away. Or at least you hope they will be running away.

    Every situation is different, there is only so much mental role play you can do. But most important, if your uncomfortable in situations like this, don't go where your going to get into them.
    Just remember that shot placement is much more important with what you carry than how big a bang you get with each trigger pull.
    www.ddchl.com
    Texas CHL Instructor
    Texas Hunter Education Instructor
    NRA Instructor

  4. #3
    Ex Member Array Mikey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    TX
    Posts
    309
    What I am about to say is what I would have done if I was a girl. If I was along I would confront the dude and pull out my gun and say something scary like : " another step forward and you will get a bullet in your head" and if the dude says something like" ooh I am not following you" you can say "well good, then you won't have a problem changing direction"

    If, there are many people around I wouldn't be too scared, maybe asked for help from others, perhaps I would call the cops.

    Another thing I want to add, being a girl, has it's perks you calling cops in front of everybody 'cause you felt threatened is no biggie, people will understand being a guy in this case is different.

  5. #4
    VIP Member Array JAT40's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    ma
    Posts
    2,366
    Do everything you can to avoid, only draw if you are in real fear for your life. If my weapon is drawn it will go bang.
    While people are saying "Peace and safety," destruction will come on them suddenly, ... and they will not escape. 1Th 5:3

  6. #5
    Member Array fatcat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    438
    This is one of the major questions when it comes to your CCW. When do you draw, and when do you walk away?

    Personally, I think each situation is going to be unique. So while you can have a handful of rules and ideas about what you want to do, I think all you can really do, is try your best.....

    My main plan, is to walk away. If they continue to follow, I would continue toward my destination, as long as that destination was not isolated. If they did continue to follow, beyond the scope of "harassment" and into "pursuit" I would probably pull out the cellphone and let them see I'm calling someone. If they still did not break off I would in fact call the police and tell them the situation if I could.......

    Now of course this is only one type of specific scenario. Chances are things might not happen like that. Perhaps they would pick up speed and try and close on me, at which time I would not run for my life, I would in turn probably draw and make it known that I was not screwing around.....

    I think all you can do is prepare for as many possible scenarios as possible, but still keep an open mind that you might have to adjust as needed.

  7. #6
    Member Array Dieselnut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    120
    I may have presented the scenario incorrectly, so let me clarify a few things. I avoid confrontation and avoid bad areas at all costs. However, certain parts of Seattle are pretty shady and can't always be avoided. I'm not a small guy, 6 foot and 210 lbs, but I'm pretty timid and do avoid confrontations whenever possible.

    I'm not really asking about a play-by-play, just what you would do in that kind of situation. I think being approached, harassed and possibly followed by a BG can happen in many environments.

    I was asking more from a legal perspective, since assessing the threat of the situation and increasing the level of defense seems like a good thing to me (to present in court, for instance, if SHTF). I was curious about verbal warnings and physical actions that would have the least likelyhood of escalating the situation. Perhaps this isn't a question that can be answered, though

  8. #7
    Member Array Gadfly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Arizona
    Posts
    80
    I still carry the advice from my CCW instructor with me: even if it's a 100% righteous shooting, look to lose your CCW weapon, possibly do jail time and have to spend tens of thousands of dollars to stay a free man/woman. Your life will never be the same once you pull that trigger. And if things really play out badly, you may spend years--or even the rest of your life in prison--you may bankrupt your family and leave them without your presence for a long, long time.

    So, as Christy Brinkley says to Chevy Chase: "Well...are you gonna GO for it?"

    Well ARE you? Think about it. You might wanna take a deep breath, reassess, even {gulp} apologize/back down. That's the higher duty/responsiblity that comes with the CCW. It's not--as much we might secretly wish--a license to play Dirty Harry II when some creep kicks sand in our face.
    Don't forget to bow as the chariot passes.

  9. #8
    Ex Member Array Mikey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    TX
    Posts
    309
    Dieselnut, I am sorry dude, I though you were a girl. Being a guy, is different if all the BG does is swearing and following you and you like to avoid confrontation, then screw it let him. If he's trying to do more than just swearing and following you got a gun be ready to draw.

  10. #9
    Member Array Dieselnut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    120
    Quote Originally Posted by Mikey View Post
    Dieselnut, I am sorry dude, I though you were a girl. Being a guy, is different if all the BG does is swearing and following you and you like to avoid confrontation, then screw it let him. If he's trying to do more than just swearing and following you got a gun be ready to draw.
    Haha, story of my life

    No worries man, I figured you'd realize I don't have boobs eventually

    Quote Originally Posted by Gadfly View Post
    I still carry the advice from my CCW instructor with me: even if it's a 100% righteous shooting, look to lose your CCW weapon, possibly do jail time and have to spend tens of thousands of dollars to stay a free man/woman. Your life will never be the same once you pull that trigger. And if things really play out badly, you may spend years--or even the rest of your life in prison--you may bankrupt your family and leave them without your presence for a long, long time.

    So, as Christy Brinkley says to Chevy Chase: "Well...are you gonna GO for it?"

    Well ARE you? Think about it. You might wanna take a deep breath, reassess, even {gulp} apologize/back down. That's the higher duty/responsiblity that comes with the CCW. It's not--as much we might secretly wish--a license to play Dirty Harry II when some creep kicks sand in our face.
    That's precisely my point! You just stated what goes through my head in every scenario I read about or think about. I do not want to draw my weapon, and I definitely do not want to fire it. You've outlined the reasons in very good detail.

    That is why I'm trying to figure out the most law abiding, conflict deescalating, and safest to me and my family way of diffusing the situation. For instance, I worry that me pulling out my phone to call 911 is just going to piss someone off more, whereas me continuing to walk, despite him following me, would have eventually been ok.

    But I see now that every situation is different and this was probably a dumb question to ask. I hope I didn't come off as a Dirty Harry wannabe, I'm very much the opposite.

  11. #10
    VIP Member Array farronwolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    4,767
    Dieselnut,

    What are the laws of WA? If your looking for the legal aspects of it you first need to know what the laws of your state are. I can tell you that in Texas, and some other states we have much more latitude than many other states have. This is from both the legal aspect and the public aspect, ie those that will be looking at the case and on the jury if it makes it that far.

    If you are trying to calm the situation down if they actually catch up to you or put you in a possition where you can not ignore them, then your doing what is right. If your telling them that you don't want any trouble, and you need to get on with your business, that is good.

    However, when it gets to the point where that isn't working well then you have to make that descision.

    Gadfly, I am going to disagree with your post. Not that your instructor told you bad info, but I think the state, or community and the circumstances of the case may prove that kind of thinking wrong in many instances.
    Just remember that shot placement is much more important with what you carry than how big a bang you get with each trigger pull.
    www.ddchl.com
    Texas CHL Instructor
    Texas Hunter Education Instructor
    NRA Instructor

  12. #11
    Member Array Dieselnut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    120
    Quote Originally Posted by farronwolf View Post
    Dieselnut,

    What are the laws of WA? If your looking for the legal aspects of it you first need to know what the laws of your state are. I can tell you that in Texas, and some other states we have much more latitude than many other states have. This is from both the legal aspect and the public aspect, ie those that will be looking at the case and on the jury if it makes it that far.

    If you are trying to calm the situation down if they actually catch up to you or put you in a possition where you can not ignore them, then your doing what is right. If your telling them that you don't want any trouble, and you need to get on with your business, that is good.

    However, when it gets to the point where that isn't working well then you have to make that descision.

    Gadfly, I am going to disagree with your post. Not that your instructor told you bad info, but I think the state, or community and the circumstances of the case may prove that kind of thinking wrong in many instances.
    I've read and mostly digested the laws of WA, but I'm in the process of getting the "official" local book on the subject. In any case, from my current understanding, WA laws actually in favor of self defense: RCW 9A.16.110: Defending against violent crime - Reimbursement. The general section is here: Chapter 9A.16 RCW Defenses

    Once again, I hope that it never goes so far. Perhaps if I turn around and smile at the BG, or maybe give him a piece of my Kit Kat bar, we could be friends?

  13. #12
    Ex Member Array Mikey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    TX
    Posts
    309
    The only time that I have seen a dude following another dude and swearing at him is at the bars , actually outside the bars and outside the clubs. And all of them wanted to fight not to rob.

    Shooting someone because he is just following you and swearing at you is not justified in my mind.

  14. #13
    Member Array Dieselnut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    120
    Quote Originally Posted by Mikey View Post
    The only time that I have seen a dude following another dude and swearing at him is at the bars , actually outside the bars and outside the clubs. And all of them wanted to fight not to rob.

    Shooting someone because he is just following you and swearing at you is not justified in my mind.
    You haven't been to Seattle, I see ;)

    Once again, I did not make my original post to ask when it's ok to shoot the guy. I made it to ask about people's opinions on the path they would take to keep themselves and their family safe, but also not unnecessarily escalate the situation by becoming overly defensive.

    I think I withdraw my question. You can consider the thread closed.

  15. #14
    Ex Member Array Mikey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    TX
    Posts
    309
    I am sorry, for misunderstanding. Keep the thread open please, I would like to hear what others have to say too. I recently had a similar post about 3 guys un- armed trying to rob you. I got some very interesting posts.

  16. #15
    VIP Member Array goldshellback's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    OKC; by way of St. Mayberry, GA
    Posts
    4,750
    Quote Originally Posted by Dieselnut View Post
    That is why I'm trying to figure out the most law abiding, conflict deescalating, and safest to me and my family way of diffusing the situation. For instance, I worry that me pulling out my phone to call 911 is just going to piss someone off more, whereas me continuing to walk, despite him following me, would have eventually been ok.

    But I see now that every situation is different and this was probably a dumb question to ask.
    There's the biggie, if you will.........do nothing to escalate a confrontation.
    If pulling your cellphone encites an agressive response, apply what you need to get out of there and nothing more.
    Some stupid wing-nut looking for trouble can just keep looking. Ifthe wing-nut just keeps it up and you feel threatened, dial 911 and let the cards fall where they may.

    I lived in Bremerton for four years and spent plenty of time in Seattle so I've got some background of your area(only a clue, nothing more).

    Situational awareness and a calm, cool head will do more for you and yours than anything else.

    Stay warm, dry,and safe.


    ....and no, it wasn't a dumb question at all.
    "Just getting a concealed carry permit means you haven't commited a crime yet. CCP holders commit crimes." Daniel Vice, senior attorney for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, quoted on Fox & Friends, 8 Jul, 2008

    (Sometimes) "a fight avioded is a fight won." ... claude clay

Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast

Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. Man Open Carries Rifle At Mall And Is Harassed...
    By Toorop in forum Open Carry Issues & Discussions
    Replies: 101
    Last Post: January 30th, 2011, 12:53 PM
  2. No longer being harassed by police for OCing; could it be true?
    By doobie in forum Open Carry Issues & Discussions
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: May 27th, 2009, 10:48 PM
  3. I was told that the wife of a deployed NCO is being harassed and stalked
    By threefeathers in forum Carry & Defensive Scenarios
    Replies: 31
    Last Post: January 20th, 2009, 01:27 AM
  4. A Rude Pro 2nd Amendment Supporter Harassed My Daughter
    By waynesan in forum Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions
    Replies: 143
    Last Post: September 10th, 2008, 10:44 PM
  5. Harassed again
    By jhh3rd in forum Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions
    Replies: 44
    Last Post: July 24th, 2008, 08:33 AM

Search tags for this page

too old to be harassed

,

what do i do if gangsters are harassing me

Click on a term to search for related topics.