Per your recounting, I see it as a 'textbook' example. Sorta' the practice of 'first, do no harm', right? The self analysis, as to the feeling of 'coward' is understandable. That is emotion, which, your rational thought processes obviously contradict. Caveat: I am not a Psy/chiatrist-chologist. I only wrote what seems to me common sense. However, I may be as full of it as a six week old puppy!