Friends do not understand my CCing.
This is a discussion on Friends do not understand my CCing. within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; I think I would tell them something like this:
"I'm really sorry that this upsets you both, you know I love hanging out with you. ...
March 15th, 2010 10:27 AM
I think I would tell them something like this:
"I'm really sorry that this upsets you both, you know I love hanging out with you. But millions of people carry concealed legally every day without incident. I'm trained, I know how to be safe -- my gun is not going to be accidentally fired and I'm not interested in getting into fire fights. I do this because I value my life and because it is harmless to do so if I am not in danger. If you would like to know the facts about concealed carry, I'd love to share them with you, but I can't let your ignorance override my safety."
I wouldn't say it in a challenging or angry manner. If anything, you should have a sad tone; make sure they understand that you value their friendship, but you value your life more.
March 15th, 2010 10:35 AM
One trick for always being able to do what you want, always bring your own car. Separate. That night you could have just said "no thanks" to the club or locked your gun in the lock box of your car. Doesn't help you now, but could help in the future.
March 15th, 2010 10:45 AM
Your gun can be a much better "friend" than those two. Keep the gun and ditch the others.
March 15th, 2010 11:11 AM
I haven't read all of the replies, but I don't need my friends approval for my actions. I didn't ask my friends permission to get my chl or to carry my weapon. Your friends don't like you carrying, to dang bad.
Blessed be the Lord my rock who trains my hands for war and my fingers for battle. Psalm 144:1
March 15th, 2010 11:36 AM
Your decision to CC is a personal one, every bit a personal as your religious choice or who you vote for. You only need to justify it to yourself and prepare to deal with the consequences. Life is all about change and ones ability to adapt. If your friends don't respect this, find ones that do.
March 15th, 2010 12:09 PM
March 15th, 2010 12:10 PM
I am glad you do, because then you surely understand how it feels to lose good friends.
Originally Posted by Bark'n
"The Second Amendment: America's Original Homeland Security"
March 15th, 2010 12:18 PM
^^^^Just about the perfect response. Don't tell. Ever. None of their buisness.
Originally Posted by wildcatCWP
March 15th, 2010 12:35 PM
It sounds like you have at least started to get them thinking about why you carry a gun.
Here is my suggestion, assuming you really want to keep them as friends make a deal with them.
Tell them you will not carry while you are with them because it makes them uncomfortable. Explain however that they in turn need to realize that not carrying makes you uncomfortable, so you will have the option of deciding where you consider it safe to go when you are not carrying. They cannot complain about your decisions regarding this. In addition, they have to also agree to let you explain how guns really operate, how you can safely carry, why you carrying makes you less likely to get into an altercation, and how having higher SA makes all of you less likely to be involved in a dangerous situation. You will also be showing them situations found in the local and national news pointing out the criminals do not play fair, and can strike at any time, in any place.
Hopefully it will not take to long to convince them that you and your gun are nothing to be feared, and that they actually should appreciate your ability to defend yourself or them should the worse happen. Perhaps they will eventually even be willing to learn a little more about ways to protect themselves.
March 15th, 2010 01:04 PM
Give them some time to think about it. They may change their mind.
And if not...they probably weren't ment to be your friends. It's sad but that's life.
Benjamin Franklin: "They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security."
March 15th, 2010 01:33 PM
I dunno. I think there's a 3rd group in there and they have absolutely no hope.
Originally Posted by MinistrMalic
Sure you can take some anti-gun folks and if you can get them comfortable enough to take some basic firearm familiarization and instruction they may come around as their anti-stance was based on an irrational fear due to mainly ignorance.
Then there's the other type, that aren't necessarily just anti-gun. They are anti-self defense period. Their stance isn't based on ignorance of the firearm and you can familiarize them and instruct them until they can do a detail strip and rebuild of every firearm in your safe and it won't make a difference. I've run into a number of folks, men and women alike that would not just not carry a firearm or allow anyone else near them to, but they wouldn't even carry pepper spray. Their theory is that any response by them would trigger a worse response from their attackers. This is a core philosophical issue that needs to be addressed and instruction or range time won't fix that.
My advice(for the measly half-cent it's worth) to the OP would be to carefully gauge the issue with the friends. If it appears that the issue is just due to fear based on ignorance of the tool, then there is hope. See if you can work something out with familiarization and instruction.
If they're in the 3rd group, they have some seriously flawed BASE philosophical issues, that quite frankly aren't worth wasting your time on working out and would take a lot more time and effort than just some instruction or range time.
So it really boils down to:
- Which group are they in(2nd from the above poster or my 3rd)?
- How good of friends do you consider them? In other words, are they worth the extra effort to you...
If you can answer both of those questions, you should be able to figure out you need to do.
"My God David, We're a Civilized society."
"Sure, As long as the machines are workin' and you can call 911. But you take those things away, you throw people in the dark, and you scare the crap out of them; no more rules...You'll see how primitive they can get."
-The Mist (2007)
March 15th, 2010 02:28 PM
I haven't read all the responses here GM, but keep in mind that the average Joe or Josephine feels that guns are the most deadly weapons on this planet, and they may fear them as we would fear shooting an overloaded 300 year old blunderbuss with no eye protection!
So, you may want to explain to your friends that a kitchen knife, a nail hammer, or a motor vehicle are all equally dangerous in the wrong hands, and then perhaps they may realize that your pistol is but an inanimate object, and it will not jump out and magically hurt them; even if you stood right next to them for the next 1000 years.
It's a just a hunk of metal, sitting there safe and sound in its own little bed (your holster), sleeping away until needed by a human (you) to make it safely operate. Since you are that human, they may (unconsciously) not trust you -- or anyone -- with such dangerous objects. If so, ask them if they trust you to drive a two ton car down the road with them as passengers; which is a far more dangerous/deadly object than any handgun could ever hope to be. Or ask them if they would feel comfortable with a trained and armed police officer in the very same room with them. If they would feel OK with a LEO, you may want to point out to your friends that you are highly trained as well, especially in firearm safety, so why would they trust a stranger, the LEO, and not you with a handgun?
March 15th, 2010 02:48 PM
Origin of phrase?
[QUOTE=BugDude;1539106]+1. Great post!! I'm going to have to use that "screwed the pooch" line, if you don't mind...classic.
Does anyne know he origin of the phrase, "screwed the Pooch"?
March 15th, 2010 02:50 PM
I think I know why as well
Originally Posted by Bark'n
If we're wrong, tell them you'll go gun-less if they go topless!
Or maybe they just prefer the "gentle"man.
I would tell them you won't carry again, then carry anyway. This time keep it concealed.
March 15th, 2010 02:56 PM
There are "true friends" and there are "close acquaintances".
I have had hundreds of close acquaintances in my life (71 years), but very few (could count them on one hand) true friends.
Those girls you said were friends were not true friends at all. A true friend will stick by you, thick or thin, and a little thing like your CC experience would not affect a true friendship.
Friends are well worth spending the time and effort to keep, acquaintances come and go - those two 'up and went'!
Build up some true friendships. It takes time, effort, and sacrifice on both sides, that's why they are so rare, but they are also valuable and lasting!
Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other"
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