This is a discussion on Concealed Carry on Dates? within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; i'll show you mine if you show me yours...
i'll show you mine if you show me yours
I belive in full disclosure before the date as I refuse to date anyone who denies me the right to defend myself. When I met my now wife she had a bunch of things going against her....
*Ivy League educated (Oxford)
And here I am a pickup truck driving, gun toting, Tennessee educated redneck.
Typically any of the above alone would mean anti gun but much to my surprise she understood the logic behind my ccw and said if it was legal she would accept it. Her other saving grace was her hot Scottish accent and the fact she looks great in a skirt. I told her early on that I refused to give this up for anyone. She did admit that she wasn't comfortable with the "bigger guns", carrying a spare mag, and a bug, etc but agreed to give it a chance. We were married after a year and she recently got her ccw. After a lot of reasoning and going shooting she now fully supports my rather large edc.
Being upfront worked for me. If ccw is important to you then you have to think long and hard if you are willing to comprimise for it.
In this day and age it would be irresponsible to go out without protection.
Only circumstance that comes to mind where I'd suggest against it is partaking in situations where alcohol (or laws surrounding alcohol) would make it unwise to do so.
My Girlfriend is so understanding that we went gun shopping, and to a movie for our Valentines Day date. But we've been dating for a while and my dispelling of myths, financial means, and moving to slightly more reasonable land of laws didn't line up until well after; she's been highly receptive (the first I even thought of making mention of it she already knew roughly what I was looking for), expect she refuses to touch a firearm because when she was ten her (much older) brothers thought it would funny to have her shoot the biggest shotgun her father had on the farm. But she saw the Pink 38 revolver that Charter Arms makes, and is having second thoughts, so maybe I can get her to come share some range time.
There's some good advice in the previously lined "when to broach the subject" thread. And just make sure your gun is bigger than hers
Funny, I was just thinking about this today. Newly divorced ... first 1st-date happening Tuesday ... and already decided I'll be carrying as usual. If it turns into a problem, oh well.
I love that quote I saw on the first page of this thread: "The reason I carry: When seconds count, a cop is only minutes away" :)
If carrying makes you comfortable, then carry. No need to tell her unless your situation makes concealment impossible...you know what I mean. Take the time to know her, and let her know you before you bring it up. Would ankle carry be OK for you? Remember the first date could be the last, and if she thinks you are a "gun nut" she is sure to spread the word.
I had a woman freak out last year. We'd been out several times and had returned to my place. She was sitting on my lap and asked, "What's that in your pocket?" I responded, "Oh, crap," got up and locked it away in my desk drawer. She was NOT happy; she was concerned that she could have been injured, even though it had been in a pocket holster.
I apologized profusely and that mostly calmed her anger.
I wouldn't write off any person that is anti-gun. They simply may need some positive education and an opportunity to meet a responsible gun owner. When I first met my wife in college, it was before I got my CCW. She was really against me getting a CCW and guns simply because she was afraid of guns. I told her my reasons for getting a CCW (target shooting, protection, etc.) and she understood, but was not happy.
When we seriously started dating, the conversation of children came up and I told her I really thought she should take a NRA safety course, to learn more about guns and safety in general. She started to understand that I took safety very seriously. Flash forward over a decade and two kids later and she has her CCW and is a great shot to boot. The last few date nights we've had have been to the range and to a nice dinner.
As for the original question, I would pocket carry just to avoid any awkward touches, hugs, etc. that may reveal a IWB/OWB rig. That being said, I'm the type that carries around my dress style, not the other way around.
Don't ask. Don't tell
If the time comes you'll be a hero when the mugger runs away.
"The natural progress of things is for liberty to yeild, and government to gain ground." - Thomas Jefferson
Well, my dating days are pretty much a thing of the past. I no longer miss it as I use to but if I were to date someone, I wouldn’t make any special concessions on carrying. In fact, as soon as the usual cat n’ mouse questions roll out: I would say that I like shooting and expound on the subject from there.
“Monsters are real and so are ghosts. They live inside of us, and sometimes they win.”
~ Stephen King
I dated a girl years ago who hated guns. She was a nurse. I think she lives in Canada now. I don't miss her. :-)
Sure, carry if that's what makes you most comfortable.
From the other related thread: If you enjoy shooting or hunting as a sport, I would discuss that as a normal part of getting-to-know-each-other conversation. That will give you some idea of where she stands.
Then just take it as it comes...if she hugs you and feels it....address any questions, if any. Again, you'll find out where she stands.
Fortune favors the bold.
Freedom doesn't mean safe, it means free.
The thing about "defense" is that it has practically nothing to do with guns. (As passed on by CCW9MM)
I am 21 as well, I carry whenever I can, whether those around me are comfortable with it or not. I think you should do the same.