How do you handle family and friends that don't like you carry? - Page 8

How do you handle family and friends that don't like you carry?

This is a discussion on How do you handle family and friends that don't like you carry? within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; My girl does not like guns and does not like the fact that I applied for my CHL. When she moved in with me a ...

Page 8 of 13 FirstFirst ... 456789101112 ... LastLast
Results 106 to 120 of 183

Thread: How do you handle family and friends that don't like you carry?

  1. #106
    Member Array tubular031's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    North Texas
    Posts
    25
    My girl does not like guns and does not like the fact that I applied for my CHL. When she moved in with me a few years ago she did not like that I have a gun under the bed. she is ok with that now. My mom just recently moved to the country and I take my gun with me when we go. She did not like it untill my mom told her that they saw some wild pigs and a few coyotes running around. I told her wouldnt you be happy when one of those animals comes after us and I pull out my xd and blast the thing? She said heck yea! I asked her how I would be able to defend us if my gun was at home 30 miles away? the light went off and now she is warming up to me carring all the time (well when my permit gets here). In texas we can carry in the car with out the permit and I usually do.

    So maybe the answer is to let them figure it out. It may take a bit for them to realize it but ask them, when the bad guy jumps us do you want me to let them beat/kill/rape you because I can not fight back?
    XD40sc & LCP


  2. #107
    New Member Array nhdude's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    NH
    Posts
    7
    To me concealed means out of sight and, for most people, out of mind as well. The only people who know I carry are my live-in girlfriend and one of my brothers who also carries. Other than that, it's really no one else's business. I carry wherever/whenever I can do so legally.

  3. #108
    Member Array boradriver's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    15
    ok people please try and understand this I didn't go around telling everyone I carry a gun. It was a buddy of mine that let it slip out to a cousin and it got back to my mother. So before that only my 2 buddies I go shooting with and one other close friend knew.
    My girlfriend figured it out when she found my permit in my pants pocket. She asked for a few dollars one morning I stayed over, to give to her son for lunch and the permit was in the same pocket as the cash(I don't carry a wallet).

    I had a long talk with my mother yesterday and she still doesn't like it but she understands its my choice and trusts my judgement. So the rest of the family can kiss my ass.

    Now it is still my choice not to carry in situations I don't feel comfortable and being in someone else's home that has small children makes me uncomfortable.

  4. #109
    Senior Member Array AlexHassin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    the North East
    Posts
    552
    First of if you want them to forget about the guns get a finance job in NYC. Then you are a Wall Street man and no one will care about the gun.
    Second why is everyone so opposed to keeping their firearm in their car when they are on someone else’s property that does not want fire arms on it? I think there are plenty of people that do not want certain things in their house and it is completely reasonable. I know plenty of families that are opposed to such things as alcohol, meat, shellfish, tobacco, even rap music in their house. Not to mention a ton of other things I have probably not run across yet. I imagine that plenty of people on this forum do not allow certain things or activities that are legal in there house.

  5. #110
    Member Array DukeShooter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Chattanooga, TN
    Posts
    224
    Thanks for your comments QuickSabre!

    Something else in my family's experience I forgot to mention which is relevant.

    My son is taking self-defense more seriously (at least martial arts for now).

    Reason for my Son's change of heart:

    While in San Antonio, TX visiting his Aunt, He got off the bus on his way to her house and accidentally went the opposite way from her house, realized his mistake, turned around and cut through one of those trash truck access alleys between two rows of houses (taking a short cut). Three BG's pulled up next to him in their car and demanded "his money" of which he had none.

    Start of the Pacifist non-violent approach:

    He said "I don't have any money" and one of the BG's jumped out of the car and wacked him in the face (right eye) with a BASEBALL BAT! They again demanded money from my bleeding and prostrate son, he said he had none and POW another line drive on his face! They then demanded and took his backpack and POW! a final line drive to him now with a bleeding face and nearly unconscious as a goodbye treat!

    He had 30+ sutures, eye and mouth, a broken "Orbit" (the bone around the eye) and a concussion. He nearly had to have surgery to protect his optic nerve (they would have put in a plate) and now has a big scar around the eye.

    Oh and he walked the final block to my sister's house, nobody heard or cared about the commotion and his condition, even the people on their front porches who watched him stagger past.

    My CCW instructor said an identical crime occurred here in town with the BG being charged with attempted murder and the victim loosing his eye!

    Needless to say I am working on persuading my Son to come to the range with me and learn to shoot + get a CCW. He now realizes that not providing for your own self-defense just makes you a victim.

    Hopefully if I was attacked like that I could have time to get my Glock 33 out and proceed neutralize the threat as I have been taught. Double tap center mass on the BG with the Bat first and his friends as needed. Follow-ups as needed to neutralize him and his partners.

    Just another sad tale of a terrible crime committed on an unarmed citizen that could have prevented if he was "carrying".

    Mike
    NRA Member, Armed Citizen and NOT a "victim of violent crime", God and Glock willing.

  6. #111
    awb
    awb is offline
    Member Array awb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    michigan
    Posts
    22
    I normally dont tell anyone .. concealed means concealed and that is the way it stays... the work I do , has me up and down ,under vehicles and bending over and what not so if someone figures it out so be it , but to date no one has .. I carry a star 9mm bkm 3:30 or so with a shielded holster IWB , normally a dress shirt (church) or work shirt /sweat shirt at work ......
    Poverbs 1:33
    whoso harkens unto me shall dwell safely and shall be quiet from fear of evil ..

    Laws that forbid the carrying of arms...disarm only those who are neither inclined or determined to commit crimes...
    --Thomas Jefferson

  7. #112
    Member
    Array Quicksabre's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Detroit, MI USA
    Posts
    446
    Quote Originally Posted by tubular031 View Post
    My girl does not like guns and does not like the fact that I applied for my CHL. When she moved in with me a few years ago she did not like that I have a gun under the bed. she is ok with that now. My mom just recently moved to the country and I take my gun with me when we go. She did not like it untill my mom told her that they saw some wild pigs and a few coyotes running around. I told her wouldnt you be happy when one of those animals comes after us and I pull out my xd and blast the thing? She said heck yea! I asked her how I would be able to defend us if my gun was at home 30 miles away? the light went off and now she is warming up to me carring all the time (well when my permit gets here). In texas we can carry in the car with out the permit and I usually do.

    So maybe the answer is to let them figure it out. It may take a bit for them to realize it but ask them, when the bad guy jumps us do you want me to let them beat/kill/rape you because I can not fight back?
    That's good technique, take it in small steps, let them figure it out. Makes sense to me. On another note, I want to move to Texas.
    "Be justified. Blood may be easily wiped from the sword.
    It cannot, however, be put back from where it came." --Quicksabre

  8. #113
    Senior Member Array JohnLeVick's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Texas High Plains
    Posts
    568
    I tell my CHL students not to inform anyone who does not need to know. Since I've been an instructor for so many years, I live in a glass house. Everyone who knows me, knows I carry. If anyone doesn't like it, I don't care. They won't do to ride the river with, anyway. The few friends I have who don't carry seem to be happy that I do, and some have told me so. If any of my family disapprove, it would only be those branches of the family with whom I don't associate, anyway. Yes, I'm a cranky old curmudgeon. They can deal with it in their own special way.

    However, I am always happy to educate the educable. Some folks just aren't, and I'm not willing to waste any energy trying. You can't fix stupid.

  9. #114
    Member
    Array Quicksabre's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Detroit, MI USA
    Posts
    446
    Quote Originally Posted by mikeroesch View Post
    While in San Antonio, TX visiting his Aunt, He got off the bus on his way to her house and accidentally went the opposite way from her house, realized his mistake, turned around and cut through one of those trash truck access alleys between two rows of houses (taking a short cut). Three BG's pulled up next to him in their car and demanded "his money" of which he had none.

    Start of the Pacifist non-violent approach:

    He said "I don't have any money" and one of the BG's jumped out of the car and wacked him in the face (right eye) with a BASEBALL BAT! They again demanded money from my bleeding and prostrate son, he said he had none and POW another line drive on his face! They then demanded and took his backpack and POW! a final line drive to him now with a bleeding face and nearly unconscious as a goodbye treat!

    He had 30+ sutures, eye and mouth, a broken "Orbit" (the bone around the eye) and a concussion. He nearly had to have surgery to protect his optic nerve (they would have put in a plate) and now has a big scar around the eye.
    Yikes. Tell him the scar makes him look tough. He is tough, to have lived through that. Lucky, too. Another valuable lesson here is that people are often apathetic/afraid to get involved in helping crime victims. Hopefully he'll remember what that felt like (being hurt and no one offering to help) and never be apathetic himself in helping others.

    Oh and he walked the final block to my sister's house, nobody heard or cared about the commotion and his condition, even the people on their front porches who watched him stagger past.
    See? That kid is tough. Most people would have laid there in the fetal position, sobbing, until help (or another mugger) arrived.

    Of course hindsight is 20/20; aside from not being in the alley in the first place, he should have dropped the backpack and ran like the wind as soon as he heard the "give me your money" line. Engaging them in conversation, even (or especially) to explain that he didn't have money, was dangerous and risky. Theoretically you can't outrun a car, and it'd be tough to hop fences in a strange neighborhood (Pit bulls? Rottweilers, who knows?) but getting out of that alley should have been top priority. You could run in a direction that would force the car to follow in reverse, but like I said, this is armchair quarterbacking at best. I'm sure he and you have replayed the incident a thousand times and come up with all kinds of things you'd like to re-do. He lived, he learned, and won't make the same mistake again, that's the main thing.

    Just another sad tale of a terrible crime committed on an unarmed citizen that could have prevented if he was "carrying".
    Maybe, probably, you just don't know. His "odds" would have been better, but even with a firearm the best course would have been to run like heck. It sounds like he's an adult, but help him stay interested in karate if at all possible, and keep working on him to get that CCW. Make sure he trains at the firearms just as hard as he trains at karate.

    Lead by example...
    "Be justified. Blood may be easily wiped from the sword.
    It cannot, however, be put back from where it came." --Quicksabre

  10. #115
    VIP Member Array Tom G's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Central Florida
    Posts
    2,375
    Keep it concealed and don't be a show off. I hope your girl friend was ok with finding the permit in your pocket. sooner or later the rest of the sheep will forget all about the carry permit. I'm lucky 99 percent of my family and friends are pro gun. the other one percent will just have to adapt to it.

  11. #116
    Member
    Array Quicksabre's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Detroit, MI USA
    Posts
    446
    Quote Originally Posted by awb View Post
    I carry a star 9mm bkm 3:30 or so with a shielded holster IWB , normally a dress shirt (church) or work shirt /sweat shirt at work ......
    Not to derail the thread, but I've heard good things about the Star; one of my karate friends has some sort of Star but I've never fired one. What's a shielded holster? I need a new holster bad and am currently fully engaged in halfheartedly shopping for one...(i.e., I need one but I am broke!)

    So I guess the bottom line for most folks about cc is, "Don't ask/Don't tell!"
    "Be justified. Blood may be easily wiped from the sword.
    It cannot, however, be put back from where it came." --Quicksabre

  12. #117
    Member Array enk5's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Akron, Ohio
    Posts
    200
    I feel extremely blessed to be surrounded by the people that are in my life (family, friends, and coworkers). My family members are all interested in guns and hunting and carrying. I cannot think of one who does not believe in taking responsibility for their own safety.

    Being a 21 year old psychology major, I am surrounded by way too many liberals. But, the ones that I am close with know that I carry and share my ideas on personal safety. I'm even in the process of talking a couple into obtaining their concealed carry license. I've found that going out to the range is an extremely effective way to turn people on to the idea of carrying.

    I understand though, after reading everyone's posts, that I am in a unique situation of never having to hide the fact that I carry. But I also know that this will most likely change in the future.

    I hope things turn out well with you and your family/friends.

  13. #118
    Member Array rcain007's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Humble, TX
    Posts
    192
    My wife has a CHL and carries daily. I took my class with about 10 of my closest friends. I shoot regularly with my neighbors. I just sold my boss an old gun I had. My sisters call me all the time and ask when I will take them to the range. My parent's don't carry, but do own firearms for home defense. I live in Texas, a state where it is legal to carry to and from and in your vehicle without any type of license whatsoever. Not much of an issue for me!
    I would stick with the old addage, "Don't ask, don't tell" and keep it to yourself.

  14. #119
    New Member Array Glock626's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    MN
    Posts
    3
    Show your mom this: YouTube - Why I CARRY a GUN

    I thought this was filled with great reasons and help others realize why people choose to carry.

  15. #120
    VIP Member Array TN_Mike's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Shelby County TN
    Posts
    11,134
    To the OP:

    It's your life. Live it and protect it as you see fit. Tell them that is what you will do. Also, explain to them that just as you do not freak out over the fact that they are anti gun, you expect the same courtesy in return about your life choices.

    Be prepared to keep taking crap about it and be prepared to sever all ties to them if it comes to that. I have done that with 2 members of my family. I was sad to have to do it, but I will not be told how to live my life or protect my family by a sheep who is too cowardly to even use a tool to protect themselves. And, I am better off with them out of my life.
    ,=====o00o _
    //___l__,\____\,__
    l_--- \___l---[]lllllll[]
    (o)_)-o- (o)_)--o-)_)

Page 8 of 13 FirstFirst ... 456789101112 ... LastLast

Sponsored Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 29
    Last Post: December 26th, 2010, 07:14 PM
  2. prayers for Carl Chandler's family and friends
    By 64zebra in forum Bob & Terry's Place
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: June 23rd, 2007, 07:09 PM

Search tags for this page

can you bring a gun to a friends house
,
family thinks i am paranoid home invasion
,
friends don't like that i carry
,
get a finance job in nyc
,
how do you handle friends of friends you dont like
,
how to handle family who dont like you
,
how to handle his friends and family that dont like you
,

how would you handle a friend like that

,
my girlfriend and her family dont like that i conceal carry
,
stories on howyourconcealed carrykept you oryourfamilyfrom getting mugged
,
trying to change my life friends and family don t like it
,
when family and friends dont like you
Click on a term to search for related topics.