Disappointed by my brother, he appears to be an anti - Page 3

Disappointed by my brother, he appears to be an anti

This is a discussion on Disappointed by my brother, he appears to be an anti within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; I'm hanging in there. I don't see us spending much time at the brothers house. Nor them at ours since my wife and I tend ...

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  1. #31
    VIP Member Array TN_Mike's Avatar
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    I'm hanging in there. I don't see us spending much time at the brothers house. Nor them at ours since my wife and I tend to wear them very openly at home. But Mom and Dad are 100% col with it!
    ,=====o00o _
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  2. #32
    Member Array sentioch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TN_Mike View Post
    I then told him of my belief that any parent that won't arm themselves for the protection of their kids are unfit parents and don't deserve children. To which he smugly stated "well I don't even own a gun." I told him I knew that and to think about what I had just said. After several seconds of silence, he hung up on me. Oh well.

    One of the reasons I was looking forward to living up here was to get to know my brother again and now that I have, I am disappointed to find out he is not only and anti, but after talking to my Dad about the whole thing, he and his rather stuck up wife are big Liberals and Obama supporters. When I told all of this to my wife last night on the phone, she flatly stated that she doesn't want our children around them or their children. That shouldn't be a problems.
    Hey, I'm sorry to hear that your brother doesn't support you on this issue. However I think it is more sad that you would break the family bond over something like this.

    So he doesn't want to defend his family with a gun. So what? That doesn't mean he wouldn't throw down his life to protect his family from a dangerous threat. He just considers it a low-risk threat that's not worth bothering with. Do you have a bomb shelter in your back yard? If you don't have a bomb shelter, then you aren't protecting your family against the threat of a bombing, hurricane, etc. It's not that you don't care about your family, it's that you don't consider these to be high-risk threats. The only difference between you and your brother is your estimation of the probability of a BG attacking your family.

    You may argue that your brother's estimation of this probability is INACCURATE, but does that make him a terrible person unfit to have children? Should people be quizzed on the probabilities of being in car accidents, hurricanes, muggings, plane crashes...etc...and not allowed to have children if they disagree with the probabilities that you think? It's really quite ridiculous...

    I can understand your belief that the gun and you are a package deal, and I'm not suggesting that you break that rule. But you don't have to lose your brother over this. Maybe if you treat him with more respect and actually get him to understand how you feel, he will be more cooperative about allowing you to protect your family. When you insulted him as a father, and told him you didn't think he has the right to be a father, that is the deepest insult you can give a person...and coming from your brother, that's just wrong.

    Although you may not always be as close with your family as you are with your girlfriend, wife, and friends...all of those people you meet along the way in life might leave you at some point. Example, about half of all marriages in the US end in divorce. But family, they know you better than anyone else because you grew up with them, and that's a bond that can never be broken or replaced.
    "In a world of compromise, some don't." -HK

  3. #33
    Member Array DukeShooter's Avatar
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    In my experience most Anti-Gun folks just poke cotton in their ears and don't listen to you, so don't try. You can't fix stupid and as I have said I have learned to not even try, it's kind of like talking to a fence post.

    The Duke
    "It's time to nut up or shut up" - Woody Harrelson, "Tallahassee" in "Zombieland"

  4. #34
    VIP Member Array TN_Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sentioch View Post
    Hey, I'm sorry to hear that your brother doesn't support you on this issue. However I think it is more sad that you would break the family bond over something like this.

    So he doesn't want to defend his family with a gun. So what? That doesn't mean he wouldn't throw down his life to protect his family from a dangerous threat. He just considers it a low-risk threat that's not worth bothering with. Do you have a bomb shelter in your back yard? If you don't have a bomb shelter, then you aren't protecting your family against the threat of a bombing, hurricane, etc. It's not that you don't care about your family, it's that you don't consider these to be high-risk threats. The only difference between you and your brother is your estimation of the probability of a BG attacking your family.

    You may argue that your brother's estimation of this probability is INACCURATE, but does that make him a terrible person unfit to have children? Should people be quizzed on the probabilities of being in car accidents, hurricanes, muggings, plane crashes...etc...and not allowed to have children if they disagree with the probabilities that you think? It's really quite ridiculous...

    I can understand your belief that the gun and you are a package deal, and I'm not suggesting that you break that rule. But you don't have to lose your brother over this. Maybe if you treat him with more respect and actually get him to understand how you feel, he will be more cooperative about allowing you to protect your family. When you insulted him as a father, and told him you didn't think he has the right to be a father, that is the deepest insult you can give a person...and coming from your brother, that's just wrong.

    Although you may not always be as close with your family as you are with your girlfriend, wife, and friends...all of those people you meet along the way in life might leave you at some point. Example, about half of all marriages in the US end in divorce. But family, they know you better than anyone else because you grew up with them, and that's a bond that can never be broken or replaced.
    Wow, way to fire one across my broadside.

    Let me retort. First off, I feel very strongly on this issue. Obviously more strongly than you.

    Secondly, he and his wife do not make their children (ages 3, 6) sit in child safety seats when they drive either. They have no fire extinguishers in their home. He routinely leaves his garage door open all night with the door into the kitchen unlocked just because he doesn't think about it. He is an idiot. His wife is an idiot.

    I don't really have a relationship with him. As I said, and you would know if you had read the entire thread before jumping in, I have seen him maybe 10 times since 1986. Spoken to him maybe 30 times since then, and that includes the 10 times we have seen each other.

    We are not close. Heck, we weren't ever close when we were growing up. So it really isn't a big deal.
    ,=====o00o _
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  5. #35
    VIP Member Array Guantes's Avatar
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    What you see here is opinions based on a few written paragraphs in the OP. Be honest with yourself, use your best judgement and do what you think is best for you and your immediate family.

  6. #36
    VIP Member Array TN_Mike's Avatar
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    That's what I'm doing. And in fact, is what I always do.
    ,=====o00o _
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  7. #37
    Member Array gruntingfrog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eagleks View Post
    If you were going to burlarize a house, steal something or rob someone ... would you do it in a poor crime ridden part of town, or the "good part of town". And he thinks BG's haven't figured that out long ago.
    I hate to be a stickler for details, but FBI statistics show that criminals do tend to burglarize poor crime-ridden parts of town (hence the term "crime-ridden"). In fact the majority of burglaries happen with one poor person robbing another poor person and not someone venturing into the good part of town to rob wealthier people. Apparently, they haven't "figured that out long ago."

    This is not saying that I think that there is no risk in "good neighborhoods" or that people shouldn't be prepared to defend themselves but the risk is a lot lower than you think. Depending on the neighborhood, his brother's kids are far more likely to drown in a pool or be hit by a car than be hurt by criminals.

    -- This message has been brought to you by someone who lives in the good part of town AND owns guns for self-defense.

  8. #38
    Member Array javabum's Avatar
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    Stick to your beliefs,And If a family member doesn't feel he has a need to protect his family the same way you do then its not your problem.

    Being a lib is a choice.So let him lay in the bed he made.And I'm sure
    Obama would come to his aid if needed.....
    I just think its a shame hes a
    Cluelessness: There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots

  9. #39
    Member Array violinjim's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DukeShooter View Post
    In my experience most Anti-Gun folks just poke cotton in their ears and don't listen to you, so don't try. You can't fix stupid and as I have said I have learned to not even try, it's kind of like talking to a fence post.

    The Duke
    yea, that! Stupid is as Stupid does. My brother will hopefully not experience this but if he does, so be it.

    JIm
    Rather be judged by 12 than carried by 6.

  10. #40
    Member Array billinmiss's Avatar
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    When I read a thread like this, I wonder if this is the right place for me to be. It sounds like there is a critical shortage of conviction here.

    I have often heard that something America needs so badly is men who are willing to stand up and be men. We don't need more pansies, gentlemen, we need men who are willing to stand up for what is right no matter the cost.

    Yes, I think family relationships are important, but that doesn't mean I am going to put up with a family philosopher whose wife carries his n*t* around in her purse indoctrinating my child with his liberal filth or polluting the air about him with some mess that seems to fit his model of what men should be; with the approval of his wife, of course.

    Yes, I have had to deal with this before and it is never pleasant, but there are things that have to be dealt with whether we like it or not; it's part of being a man.

    YMMV, of course,

    Bill

    Good luck Mike.

  11. #41
    Member Array Griffworks's Avatar
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    I'm sorry this has happened to you. I've been fortunate thus far that it's not been an issue for me, either with family or friends (knock on wood!).

    Quote Originally Posted by ncsteveh View Post
    And there lies the problem, It's not him is her, she wears the pants in that house and he is afraid to stand up to her, he might not show it but he may be. I'll bet a dollar to a doorknob that she has a Ivy league education or is a teacher.
    My wife is a teacher and we have several friends who are teachers - but all of whom own firearms and/or carry. Blanket statements like this are inflammatory and are what start a lot of arguments.......
    Arkansas Concealed Carry Instructor #12-751

    If guns kill people, then:
    Pincels miss spel werds;
    Cars make people drive drunk;
    And spoons made Rosie O'Donnel fat.

  12. #42
    Member Array sentioch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TN_Mike View Post
    Wow, way to fire one across my broadside.

    Let me retort. First off, I feel very strongly on this issue. Obviously more strongly than you.
    I don't mean to be attacking you by any means. I was/am just hoping the best for you and your relationship with your brother.

    Basically, my point is that two people with the exact same priorities -- and who therefore should be able to agree and get along -- can behave differently (ie, always carry a gun or never carry a gun) depending purely on their estimation of the probability of certain events occurring (like being mugged or attacked by a dog).

    Secondly, he and his wife do not make their children (ages 3, 6) sit in child safety seats when they drive either. They have no fire extinguishers in their home. He routinely leaves his garage door open all night with the door into the kitchen unlocked just because he doesn't think about it. He is an idiot. His wife is an idiot.
    I would agree that this is not very responsible parenting....and I wouldn't want to leave my kids under his protection. But I don't understand why you can't look past his responsibilities and enjoy his company around the BBQ pit!

    I don't really have a relationship with him. As I said, and you would know if you had read the entire thread before jumping in, I have seen him maybe 10 times since 1986. Spoken to him maybe 30 times since then, and that includes the 10 times we have seen each other. We are not close. Heck, we weren't ever close when we were growing up. So it really isn't a big deal.
    The closest comparison I have is to my dad. My parents are divorced and I rarely saw him, we weren't very close, I didn't respect his decisions and had very different opinions. But as I got older we've both tried to repair that relationship and I'm glad.

    You said in the original post that you were interested in trying to reconnect with your brother. Nobody really agrees on what is the best way to be a parent. Even husband and wife will come to disagreements...but luckily they aren't your kids! I just don't see why his bad parenting skills should get in the way of your friendship.
    "In a world of compromise, some don't." -HK

  13. #43
    Senior Member Array 1911PKR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gruntingfrog View Post
    I hate to be a stickler for details, but FBI statistics show that criminals do tend to burglarize poor crime-ridden parts of town (hence the term "crime-ridden"). In fact the majority of burglaries happen with one poor person robbing another poor person and not someone venturing into the good part of town to rob wealthier people. Apparently, they haven't "figured that out long ago."

    This is not saying that I think that there is no risk in "good neighborhoods" or that people shouldn't be prepared to defend themselves but the risk is a lot lower than you think. Depending on the neighborhood, his brother's kids are far more likely to drown in a pool or be hit by a car than be hurt by criminals.

    -- This message has been brought to you by someone who lives in the good part of town AND owns guns for self-defense.
    All true AND.... that sense of security is what makes them !

  14. #44
    Senior Member Array rmodel65's Avatar
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    ive got some family that is anti carry....they live near metro atlanta i just carry my keltec pf9 in my pocket or right about my wallet on my hip

    if they ask if i brought my gun which has been the last 3-4 times this year i just pat my waist or lift my shirt keeps them content

    YMMV
    S&W M&P40/M&P9c OC rigs
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  15. #45
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    Mike this just doesn't sound right to me. I know you must be having a rough time of it lately because you don't sound like the happy go lucky TN Mike that we all know. Shake it off brother , the worm will turn for ya. : )
    It is surely true that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. Nor can you make them grateful for your efforts.

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