On Again - Off Again SA

This is a discussion on On Again - Off Again SA within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; OK, I need some advice. I'm having a hard time getting my wife to realize that she isn't as safe as she was growing up ...

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Thread: On Again - Off Again SA

  1. #1
    Member Array wraymusicman's Avatar
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    On Again - Off Again SA

    OK, I need some advice.

    I'm having a hard time getting my wife to realize that she isn't as safe as she was growing up in rural WY where her family knew everyone for 100 miles.

    I didn't post this, but a month or so ago, we were in Denver for a date, and I stopped at a gas station to fill up before heading home. My wife ran in the store for an ice cream, and while she was in there a car pulled up, backed in to a space, and the driver left the car running while he ran inside. Condition ORANGE, I'm outside and she's inside, and fortunately notices what's going on right away. She stays at the back of the store, keeping shelving between her and the front counter, and eventually the guy buys a pack of cigs and leaves. Good on her, she did exactly what she could.

    Last night I get home from work after 10pm, and she starts telling me about a book salesman she talked to. More conversation, and she tells me that she invited him in - at 9pm! After I get the whole story, it turned out to be a 17-18yo kid on a summer job, and she ended up making him a sandwich and sending him on his way.

    I don't want to come to home to find a "book salesman" who has taken more than a sandwich, and tried to make this clear last night. She knows that I carry, knows that I will defend her, but somehow feels that that's enough. Like I said, on again - off again SA on her part, and I'm not sure how to get the point across. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
    What the **** - How did I end up on this soapbox again?!?!?

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  3. #2
    Ex Member Array Treo's Avatar
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    The only way to get constant SA is to be in a situation that requires it like a combat zone or South Chicago. Maybe ask your wife not to let strangers iin the house unless you're home?

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    Ex Member Array MadMac's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wraymusicman View Post
    Last night I get home from work after 10pm, and she starts telling me about a book salesman she talked to. More conversation, and she tells me that she invited him in - at 9pm! After I get the whole story, it turned out to be a 17-18yo kid on a summer job, and she ended up making him a sandwich and sending him on his way.

    I don't want to come to home to find a "book salesman" who has taken more than a sandwich, and tried to make this clear last night. She knows that I carry, knows that I will defend her, but somehow feels that that's enough.
    I'll beat an old, tired drum I use here far too frequently. My wife and I no longer answer the door for ANYONE except family, close friends/neighbors, or for someone with whom we have made an appointment such as a tradesman. There are NO exceptions.

    In a nearby neighborhood two years ago, a nice, retired couple opened their door to a bleeding young man (18-20 years old) who proceeded to beat the 62 year old homeowner nearly to death, then sexually assualted his wife after chasing her into the back yard.
    The horrified neighbors noticed and called 911 and waited, then waited some more. The assailant was gone before police could arrive. No one could do anything but give descriptions to the cops.

    The next week, my wife and I bought our first pistols, and signed up for our CHP class.

    There is absolutely NO VALUE WHATSOEVER in opening our door to an unannounced stranger. None. Period.

    They are only a salesperson of some sort, gypsies looking to rip you off for home "services", or census workers. There is no door-to-door guy who sells discounted Kimbers, so there is no need for me to open my door.

    If the Vienna Boys Choir and Mormon Tabernacle Choir all show up and need help with their tour bus, I'll call 911 from inside (with my sidearm at the ready), and let the LEOs help them.

    If Angelina Jolie is bruised and bleeding and pleads for me to open the door, I'll call 911 from inside (and armed) and let the paramedics deal with her.

    I know it goes against our Good Samaritan nature, but in this day and age, you have to be smart. Opening your door to strangers isn't smart. Ever.

  5. #4
    Distinguished Member Array bladenbullet's Avatar
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    i gotta draw the line at angelina jolie....i would not have a problem being beaten blody by her...

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    Senior Member Array DaRedneck's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bladenbullet View Post
    i gotta draw the line at angelina jolie....i would not have a problem being beaten blody by her...
    +1

    Whip me, beat me, make me write hot checks! LOL!

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    VIP Member Array oakchas's Avatar
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    +1 on the angelina comments... as long as she's alone...

    OTOH, I trust my wife's judgement... If she let them in, they're probably good guys. But there's that word... probably.

    It is getting "worse" out there... Is it so bad that we can show no charity at our door? Some places, maybe not yet... but it's coming, even here, I fear.
    Rats!
    It could be worse!
    I suppose

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    Member Array Hubs's Avatar
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    A female alone at home at 9:00 pm letting in strangers in is a BIG NO-NO in my house! Not done!!!

    It is too risky. My wife will not not open the door unless it is someone she knows pretty well......
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    Ex Member Array MadMac's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by oakchas View Post
    OTOH, I trust my wife's judgement... If she let them in, they're probably good guys. But there's that word... probably.

    It is getting "worse" out there... Is it so bad that we can show no charity at our door? Some places, maybe not yet... but it's coming, even here, I fear.
    The woman who let the injured young man in her home ended up being sexually assaulted and her husband almost killed. She said he was injured and had asked for help. He seemed like a nice boy.

    Heck, even I don't trust my own judgment. I'll call 911 and watch you through the peephole until the cops/medics arrive.

    I no longer hand out charity from my front door. To anyone.

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    Member Array wraymusicman's Avatar
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    I agree with all the points made, but what I'm looking for is a good way to raise her level of SA without making her feel like she has to be paranoid.

    I did have a follow-up conversation on the phone with her this morning, and told her that it makes me nervous when she does stuff like that. She must have been thinking about it a little since our conversation last night, and apologized for letting him in the house. Maybe a move on the right direction? Time will tell .........
    What the **** - How did I end up on this soapbox again?!?!?

  11. #10
    Member Array Pyro07's Avatar
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    some of yall are paranoid especially with the convenience store thing i frequently pull in leave my truck runnin and run in and grab a soda or some cigs and some ppl prefer to back in SA is good but you dont need to be quite so paranoid

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    VIP Member Array ctsketch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pyro07 View Post
    some of yall are paranoid especially with the convenience store thing i frequently pull in leave my truck runnin and run in and grab a soda or some cigs and some ppl prefer to back in SA is good but you dont need to be quite so paranoid

    Umm there nothing paranoid about not leaving your vehicle running while you are in a shop... most crimes are crimes of opportunity, and vehicle theft is a very frequent one.
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    VIP Member Array oakchas's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MadMac View Post
    The woman who let the injured young man in her home ended up being sexually assaulted and her husband almost killed. She said he was injured and had asked for help. He seemed like a nice boy.

    Heck, even I don't trust my own judgment. I'll call 911 and watch you through the peephole until the cops/medics arrive.

    I no longer hand out charity from my front door. To anyone.
    Yes, I understand... and at 9 pm... as in the original post... I would no longer trust her judgement. But the OP called her, and expressed his concern for her safety, and she apologized for letting him in...

    By expressing his conceern for her, rather than berating her for her questioable action... wins her over, increases heer awareness... all in all, a win... this time...
    Rats!
    It could be worse!
    I suppose

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    Distinguished Member Array bladenbullet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pyro07 View Post
    some of yall are paranoid especially with the convenience store thing i frequently pull in leave my truck runnin and run in and grab a soda or some cigs and some ppl prefer to back in SA is good but you dont need to be quite so paranoid
    i felt the same way about it...

    Quote Originally Posted by ctsketch View Post
    Umm there nothing paranoid about not leaving your vehicle running while you are in a shop... most crimes are crimes of opportunity, and vehicle theft is a very frequent one.
    the paranoia was not the vehicle getting stolen...it was someone running into the store with the engine running...thought being they were there to rob the store...

  15. #14
    VIP Member Array ctsketch's Avatar
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    Oh I guess I misinterpreted it...yes I would not automatically assume the person doing that was trying to rob the place. just someone who left their car running for a convenience store stop..
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  16. #15
    Ex Member Array MadMac's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by oakchas View Post
    Yes, I understand... and at 9 pm... as in the original post... I would no longer trust her judgement. But the OP called her, and expressed his concern for her safety, and she apologized for letting him in...

    By expressing his conceern for her, rather than berating her for her questioable action... wins her over, increases heer awareness... all in all, a win... this time...
    I never suggested he berate her. In fact, I agree with the entirety of your post.

    However, I do not understand how a woman at home alone would feel it is of no concern to open the door to her home to a stranger in the late evening, and invite him inside. I related this story to my wife, and she was shocked someone would consider doing this.

    I suppose she'd also stop to offer a lift to this gentleman:


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