Ramifications of what your companions say to the police?

[mfcmb]

I've read many discussions about what you, the citizen defender, should or shouldn't say to the police dispatcher on the phone, or the officers who arrive on the scene, after making defensive use of your firearm.

But I've never seen a discussion of the ramifications of what your companions (spouse, children, friends...) at the time of the event might say to these people.

In my case I have a wife and teenage kids. I can see them being traumatized by the event and saying quite a lot to any LEO who takes an interest. But it seems like quite a bit of what they might say could be problematic.

Wouldn't they be just as likely as I to not remember the incident accurately in the adrenaline-charged immediate aftermath? And wouldn't any statements they make be taken as eye-witness testimony, that would be difficult or impossible to correct later on in court? So shouldn't they, also, be parsimonious in what they say to LEOs? And what happens to me if they're not?

[DefensiveCarry.com]

[SIXTO]

Yes and no. Excited utterances are rarely useful in an investigation/prosecution. And, witness statements are used to back up physical evidence and witness statements are only good when the physical evidence corroborate.

Should one be cautious and lawyer up ASAP? Yeah, thats a good idea. Should one completely clam up and not cooperate? Thats never a good idea.

[ksholder]

My rule is that the wife and kids have no part in the conversation as they were not operating the vehicle. They are to sit still and be quiet unless the officer addresses them directly. I have not had an opportunity to test their compliance or the effectiveness of this strategy.

[Sticks]

IIRC Family members are not required to testify or give statements...their family. Friends however...'nother ball game.

Best to have this talk with the family about what to say and not say if something happens when they are around.

Maybe advise the friends that you spend the most time with on what to say - EXAMPLE - Only tell the police exactly what you saw and heard during the scant few seconds of the incident. Do not give observations of my demeanor or mood. Do not give past history of my reasons for carrying a gun or what I may or may not have said. For the gods sake, do not compare notes with others before the police arrive. Well meaning friends can hang you out to dry without even realizing it/meaning to.

[archer51]

Hopefully family and friends will stay out of it, unless specifically asked something. In reality you can not control what comes out of the mouth of others, only your own.

[Rotorblade]

My rule is that the wife and kids have no part in the conversation as they were not operating the vehicle. They are to sit still and be quiet unless the officer addresses them directly.

If I told my wife that they would need to roll another EMT for my carcass..........

[Sledzep01]

Yes and no. Excited utterances are rarely useful in an investigation/prosecution. And, witness statements are used to back up physical evidence and witness statements are only good when the physical evidence corroborate.

Should one be cautious and lawyer up ASAP? Yeah, thats a good idea. Should one completely clam up and not cooperate? Thats never a good idea.

I agree.
Plus we should be training our families on how they should respond.
Both my boys already understand that no matter who gives them a command or asks them a question if I am there you do what I say to do period. If I am not there they are to follow what I have told them to do.
BUT...
Training your wife is like training the cat. It only works if they agree to it. the kids are easy.

Sled

[Deerbnb]

[HTML][/HTML]

I agree.
Plus we should be training our families on how they should respond.
Both my boys already understand that no matter who gives them a command or asks them a question if I am there you do what I say to do period. If I am not there they are to follow what I have told them to do.
BUT...

Training your wife is like training the cat. It only works if they agree to it. the kids are easy.

Sled

AMEN

[archer51]

I agree.
Plus we should be training our families on how they should respond.
Both my boys already understand that no matter who gives them a command or asks them a question if I am there you do what I say to do period. If I am not there they are to follow what I have told them to do.
BUT...
Training your wife is like training the cat. It only works if they agree to it. the kids are easy.

Sled

My wife and my cats are well trained....they do exactly what they want to do!

[Sticks]

My wife and my cats are well trained....they do exactly what they want to do!

Isn't it "I do exactly what they want me to do?

[Eagleks]

You have to remember that officer's adrenaline is also up if they are going to a shots fired, or someone's been shot situation. They will not hear what you say, but what they think they heard you say. They may put meanings to your words, that weren't there and weren't intended. I've seen where they think they've heard things, that were never said.

If you say anything, factual, simple and minimal as possible.

The absolute MOST I'ld say is.... this person did x/y/z and I was in fear of my life, and had to defend myself. That's it.

[OldLincoln]

Yeah what passengers say can be a *****. Following is a report my friend told me about a traffic stop he had.

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says,' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir .'

The driver says, 'Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating . '

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly, dear -- you know that this car doesn't have cruise control. '

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls,
'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once!! ? '

The wife smiles demurely and says, 'Well dear you should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did or your speed would have been higher. '

As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth,
'Woman, can't you keep your mouth shut? '

The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir.
That's an automatic $75 fine. '

The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see, officer, I had it on, but I took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket. '

The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving. '

And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket , the driver turns to his wife and barks, ' W ILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?? '

The officer looks over at the woman and asks, 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am? '

'Only when he's been drinking.!! '

[mfcmb]

Thank you all for your comments.