Wife is against it - Page 4

Wife is against it

This is a discussion on Wife is against it within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Originally Posted by cammo girl ... Education will likely help. How could a reasonable person not come to the conclusion that carrying is the way ...

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Thread: Wife is against it

  1. #46
    VIP Member Array oakchas's Avatar
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    Jun 2009
    Quote Originally Posted by cammo girl View Post
    Education will likely help. How could a reasonable person not come to the conclusion that carrying is the way to go - for some - if not for themselves.
    I agree that there is a need to pick your battles... This is one I have chosen. I cannot truly win the battle with force, as I want the alliance of the "foe." A defeated, shamed, or coerced, enemy will never be a true ally.

    There are a whole bunch of folks out there that are reasonable. They have come to the reasonable conclusion that carrying is not for them, as there is no need. A great many of those insist that since there is no need for them to carry, we are wrong to do so. We have a bunch of labels for them, that I need not enumerate. But it is a simple fact that they are as bigoted as they claim us to be.
    It could be worse!
    I suppose

  2. #47
    VIP Member Array TN_Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mfcmb View Post
    There have been a lot of good replies from various perspectives so I won't repeat them. But here's something that hasn't been mentioned yet: It's not uncommon for someone to trust *you* but distrust a *gun* even if you're the one managing it. It's almost like the gun is a third person. This shows that he/she hasn't fully thought things through and come to an integrated understanding of the situation. There's no one way to rectify this, and several of the replies made so far suggest approaches that would work for various people. Hopefully you can figure out which approach will work with your wife.
    Very good response here. Many of the others are great as well.

    here is what I suggest, find a range that teaches a handgun familiarity course that she can take. She may not want to take it but you must convince her to do so. One approach may be that you want her to be able to defend the kid(s) when you are not there. I believe her basic problem is that she is afraid of guns. She needs to overcome this fear. A gun is an inanimate object. It is no more dangerous than a hammer or baseball bat. The person wielding the tool has the intent, not the tool itself.

    A good course that will teach her about handguns, one that especially is geared to women would be ideal. But from a standpoint of being a responsible father, I would urge you to help her overcome this irrational fear. I would hate myself for the rest of my life if I didn't carry because my wife had feelings such as these and then one of my children were kidnapped, raped or killed and I had no way to prevent it. I do not want you to go through something like that.

    Something else I might suggest is, have her read this forum. Lots of good info on here. Also, show her the cornered cat website. Cornered Cat this site is by a woman for women and is about carrying for defense of self and family. Get her to read the site.

    I would also suggest looking up LimaTunes on here. She has a blog about carrying from a woman's perspective and has a FaceBook page devoted to the same thing.
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  3. #48
    VIP Member Array oneshot's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Guantes View Post
    There are times when you (and family) are targeted that the only thing that will help reduce or prevent injuries to you and yours is the deployment of equal or superior force. In most cases, that force is a gun. If you knew ahead of time when you would be "cornered", her words, you could only carry those times, but unfortunately there is no way of knowing ahead of time. The answer, carry whenever possible.


    You tell her that YOUR crystal ball is in the shop, so therefore you cannot tell when you might need it.
    Ask her how HER crystal ball is working.
    Then when she says you don't need the firearm that day, you may leave it at home.
    Until she can say without question, when, how and who,,,, well then, theres her answer,


    to what TN_Mike said about cornered cat^^^^^^^^^

    And limatunes
    I would rather die with good men than hide with cowards
    If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans
    Don't ever think that the reason I'm peaceful is because I don't know how to be violent

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  5. #49
    Senior Member Array dairycreek's Avatar
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    Nov 2005
    North Plains, Oregon
    Been married 50 years and have carried concealed for most of that time. Wife has not liked it all that time. She was glad I had the gun the one time I really needed it - but she still does not like the fact that I carry. We agree to agree to disagree! As I said, been married 50 years. I think it will last - just do not have to agree on every little thing!
    De gustibus non est disputandem

  6. #50
    Member Array PatAz's Avatar
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    Apr 2010
    Oro Valley, Arizona
    Have her take the class with you, two are better than one.

  7. #51
    Distinguished Member Array XD 45's Avatar
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    Aug 2007
    Where ever the government says go
    Id carry but not let her see it out of sight out of mind
    Glock 23, Mossberg 590A, M&P 15 Rossi 641, RIA 1911,Sig 320(EDC)

    If You Want To Know The Mind Of A Man Listen To His Words

  8. #52
    Member Array JBinMont's Avatar
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    Mar 2011
    Kalispell, MT
    Many years ago, I had a girlfriend that made the statement, "When we get married, your getting rid of all that stuff and quiting your cop job" I told her good bye, with the added, "You can't save my life, they can". My wife and I have been married almost 30 yrs, and she is very 2A and pro carry.
    "Trouble Never Makes An Appointment"

  9. #53
    Member Array Backnblack's Avatar
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    Aug 2009
    Quote Originally Posted by buzzed View Post
    I have my CHL in Texas and am properly trained with a weapon, and the use of deadly force (Was in the Marines).

    Here is the issue, my wife trusts me with a weapon and knows that i am level headed and competent. She knows I don't have a hero or paranoid or tough guy mentality. But she still doesn't want me to carry.

    She says her main concern is in the event that i draw my weapon, I will make myself and my family a bigger target.

    She admits that if cornered she would prefer that i be armed but she still doesn't want me to carry with her and the kids.

    Mine was the same, I told her to deal with it...Now she has her CWP also...
    mr.stuart likes this.

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  10. #54
    Member Array Tigers's Avatar
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    Feb 2010
    South Carolina
    Not a debateable issue in my household. Make a stand
    mr.stuart likes this.

  11. #55
    VIP Member Array smolck's Avatar
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    Mar 2011
    Well I have been wearing my gun for about a week and my wife has yet to even notice. Gotta love the King Tuck! So now there is only one person who knows I carry, me.

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