After how long do you tell someone?

This is a discussion on After how long do you tell someone? within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Originally Posted by SpringXDsub Hey all, I am a younger male and have been doing the "dating scene" a lot lately. So that has got ...

Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 31 to 45 of 55
Like Tree32Likes

Thread: After how long do you tell someone?

  1. #31
    VIP Member
    Array Mike1956's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Marion County, Ohio
    Posts
    9,060
    Quote Originally Posted by SpringXDsub View Post
    Hey all,
    I am a younger male and have been doing the "dating scene" a lot lately. So that has got me thinking a little bit. It may be a silly question, but I want to hear your opinions. At what point would you tell the person your dating you carry? I mean, obviously you don't introduce yourself and say "Hi, im ---, i carry". But on the other end if you wait for to long it could cause some issues too. So, this is more of a conversation question, but at what point do you/have you/would you tell your person your seeing you carry?

    Thanks!
    -Nick.
    Ah, an easy one. If I am not going to wake up looking at her, I have absolutely no reason to tell her I am carrying.

  2. Remove Ads

  3. #32
    Moderator
    Array gasmitty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Gilbert, AZ
    Posts
    9,500
    Quote Originally Posted by dukalmighty View Post
    You wanta try to be on the same page,when you bring up a topic about how you carry to be safe and start talking about different brands like Winchester,Federal,Hornady,Cor Bon etc and stopping power,and in some cases may not even need protection,she may think your talking about condoms
    That chat could become quite interesting if you carry a big-bore Trojan... (the STI, I mean)
    Smitty
    NRA Endowment Member

  4. #33
    Senior Member Array Chad Rogers's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Metro DC
    Posts
    958
    Quote Originally Posted by Mike1956 View Post
    Ah, an easy one. If I am not going to wake up looking at her, I have absolutely no reason to tell her I am carrying.
    Man I didn't even have to wake up with 90%...

  5. #34
    Member Array Lanner's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    263
    Quote Originally Posted by rgbiker View Post
    Start gradually with a few innocent questions:

    1). Is she a Democrat?
    2). Did she vote for Obama?
    3). Is she from California/New Jersey/New York/Maryland/Chicago?
    4). Has she ever heard of the NRA?
    5). Has she ever heard of the Brady Campaign Against Gun Violence?
    etc.....
    I just have to say something about this.
    I am a liberal, voted for Obama, am a member of the NRA,love guns, and dont believe in the Brady Bill and think CCW carriers should be allowed to carry everywhere because the bad guys sure do.
    I dont want to flame away however much this tempts me to, but I have dated wonderful women republicans, democrats, gun lovers, and gun haters. Just because someone has a differing opinion than you does not limit their value to a potential relationship.
    I am now lucky to be with a liberal, gun loving, beautiful veteran who has no problem with me carrying and although she doesnt all the time, she is working on it.
    So to address the original question, I would bring it up on the 3 or 4th date and it is a deal breaker only if she makes it a deal breaker. You carrying even if she disagrees doesnt necessarily mean it wont be a great relationship.

    Now if we are talking about just having "fun" with some girl you meet at a bar and not relationships, dont even bring it up.
    Concealed is concealed.

  6. #35
    Member Array Hoozyerdaddy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Kentucky
    Posts
    163
    I dated a lady for several months and only after that length of time I found she was extremely anti gun. When she "found" my EDC that I had on me every single time we dated she went into "mother-in-law" mode (you married guys know how that is right). Needless to say we stopped seeing each other shortly after that I never would give up my right to defend myself and my family for anybody. But I did start to care for this woman a bit by then. A few months ago I hear through the grapevine she was held up and hit a few times by a mugger even after he already had her purse. That kinda made my point to her even with me not being around at the time a gun is just a tool to me us a bit safer, it's up to each of us to do 99% of the work before a firearm ever comes into the picture.
    "Fear is nothing more than an emotional response to the perception of danger coupled with the belief that I can't handle it."
    "If you change that belief to 'I can handle it', you'll no longer experience FEAR. You'll simply see what you are facing is a challenge... an opportunity to test yourself.

  7. #36
    Moderator
    Array RETSUPT99's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Central Florida
    Posts
    43,790
    Quote Originally Posted by Gunner3126 View Post
    Maybe it will go like this......

    Watch the last part of the scene......

    Tackleberry/Kirland (Police Academy) - YouTube
    Made me laugh out loud...
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

    ***********************************
    Certified Glock Armorer
    NRA Life Member[/B]

  8. #37
    Member Array paching's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Location
    Kissimmee, Florida
    Posts
    407
    It depends on how much you like her.. you do and you tell her your on a special government assignment (wink, wink). You don't and you tell her you got a hit on your head.
    Why?? Because at the last second, the Police are minutes away.

  9. #38
    Senior Member
    Array marcclarke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Loveland, Colorado USA
    Posts
    727
    Quote Originally Posted by eb View Post
    My advice would be while talking about stuff you like to do, mention going to the gun range. If that produces an undesirable response, find a more reasonable woman.
    Exactly. Invite your date to go shooting with you; you furnish the guns and ammunition and pay the range fees. Unless, of course, she wants to bring her own gun, in which case you immediately start shopping for a large diamond.

  10. #39
    Senior Member Array JohnK87's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Hastings, MN
    Posts
    600
    Quote Originally Posted by limatunes View Post

    Poor JD... after he asked me out the first time I sat down with him and went over a literal list of qualities I needed in a man.
    That wouldn't be so bad-- getting a list from the father on the first date would be worse!

    I had a similar thing- early dates were to identify if the person had serious dating potential. Good to find out what someone is like, and know what the dealbreakers are.
    ‎An enemy of liberty is no friend of mine. I do not owe respect to anyone who would enslave me by government force, nor is it wise for such a person to expect it. -- Isaiah Amberay

  11. #40
    Member Array Greg Foster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Whidbey Island, WA
    Posts
    252
    I talked with my woman about why I wanted to get my CPL, and she was all for it. She wanted to be with me when I went to the Police Dept to do the paperwork and get finger printed. She didn't say it but I think she wanted to be there to see for herself that I had no criminal history and was a good guy.
    As soon as you feel your relationship with her is serious Bro, let her know. Then take her to the range

  12. #41
    Member Array AZDaven's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Phoenix, Arizona
    Posts
    79
    I agree, when she asks if you have protection, say yep! I just took it out today and it fired perfectly... it's an excellent shooter... Too abrupt? LOL

  13. #42
    Member Array nwbackpacker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Washington State
    Posts
    160
    Quote Originally Posted by rammerjammer View Post
    But the idea of taking her to a shooting range for a date is a great idea. If she totally freaks out or wont do it, its time to move on.
    Shooting ranges can be scary places for some people, purely just because of the noise. My local range can be quite loud and even though my wife doesn't have (much of) a problem with me having guns, she's still really didn't enjoy the range. She was nervous with all the BOOMING of weapons and people around her with guns.

    I would suggest bringing up the topic early on to make sure she's not massively anti-gun and totally freaks out, but leave the range to later once you've installed the ball and chain and she can't leave you (joke). It might not be an enjoyable date... When she suggests that you both go to see a chick flick, you can suggest the range. :)

  14. #43
    Senior Member Array Adkjoe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Northern Vermont
    Posts
    765
    I started seeing this woman recently, she's been to my house I've showed her most of my guns but she has never asked if I carry one and I've never told her I carried one. The other night we went out to dinner and when we got back to my house I took off my flannel I was wearing and she saw The .357 in my waistband. She said " You've had that on you the whole time we were out?" I said I've had that on me every time we've been out. She just looked at me and smiled and she hasn't said anything about it since, guess I got off lucky ? :)
    Vermont does not issue Permit/Licenses to Carry a Concealed firearm. Vermont allows anyone
    who can legally own a firearm to carry it concealed without a permit of any kind.

  15. #44
    Ex Member Array walleye's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    erie PA
    Posts
    677
    Quote Originally Posted by SpringXDsub View Post
    Hey all,
    I am a younger male and have been doing the "dating scene" a lot lately. So that has got me thinking a little bit. It may be a silly question, but I want to hear your opinions. At what point would you tell the person your dating you carry? I mean, obviously you don't introduce yourself and say "Hi, im ---, i carry". But on the other end if you wait for to long it could cause some issues too. So, this is more of a conversation question, but at what point do you/have you/would you tell your person your seeing you carry?

    Thanks!
    -Nick.
    It's not like you're confessing a past secret murder.

    Just talk about your life, which includes shooting. So, I'd mention I was "at the range the other night" etc. if talking about each other's week. Skip the CCW as some Huge Announcement. She might ask, people have asked me once they know I shoot at the range etc. Depending on who they are, I'll just say, "yeah, times I do. Pass the salt." Or when you feel like it's something that'd be usual to mention when you're talking about guns, go ahead and mention it.

    The more you make a "BIG ISSUE" out of it, the more she'll think of it as a "BIG ISSUE". Just be natural. If you don't feel like mentioning this on a first date - so don't.

    Whatever: "All you gotta do is - Act naturallleeeeeee")

  16. #45
    Ex Member Array MadMac's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    2,095
    If she hasn't discovered your sidearm herself by the third date, you're doing it wrong.

    I'm looking at you, SmartCarry owners.....

Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast

Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Search tags for this page

can you tell how long someone is

,

how do you tell a woman your dating you carry a gun

,

how long after concealed carry

,

how to tell someone after a first

,

hugging while carrying concealed

,

tell somebody by after are you

,

what to tell the person your dating

Click on a term to search for related topics.