Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves - Page 3

Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves

This is a discussion on Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Congrats on your class. As to your MIL, that may be a much more difficult hill to climb. Not sure if it will help, but ...

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Thread: Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves

  1. #31
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    Congrats on your class. As to your MIL, that may be a much more difficult hill to climb. Not sure if it will help, but you might point out to her, that Chicago, which has some of the most stringent gun laws in the country, also has one of the highest murder rates. Also point out, that the police do a good job of investigating crime, but are very seldom in proximity to stop a crime.
    Freedom doesn't come free. It is bought and paid for by the lives and blood of our men and women in uniform.

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  2. #32
    Member Array LaraCroft10's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by varob View Post
    As for the b-friend, establish some ground rules with him. Let him know by blabbing to his family, after you asked him not to, violates your trust and puts you in an awkward position when you visit his family.
    He didn't violate my trust. I wasn't exactly stringent on it. At first I did say I wasn't going to tell anyone and didn't want him to, but then I told several people and kind of eased up on that, so I think he took the cue from me. He seemed pretty upset when he found out the things his mom said to me (the first time anyone has really showed opposition - and everyone else in his family is cool with it, some of them even want to go shooting with me), so I think from now on we're going to be more careful.

    Regarding taking her to the range....she could barely even be near me just thinking about me having a gun on me because she is scared of it, you really think the next step is taking her shooting? I don't think we're ready for that any time soon.
    Proud owner of a Sig Sauer P238 SAS Explosive Space Modulator.

    "I played the powerless in too many dark scenes. And I was blessed with a birth and a death, and I guess I just want some say in between." - Ani DiFranco, "Talk to me Now."

  3. #33
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    Those convinced against their will, are of the same opinion still.
    The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. ~Burke, Edmund

    Proud owner of a G35. And yes I carry it concealed.

  4. #34
    VIP Member Array multistage's Avatar
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    Don't fret over you mother in law. You won't change her mind, and she won't change yours.

    You're a big girl, all grown up. You don't need anybody's approval. Or unsolicited advice.

    SIG, huh? My favorite make.

  5. #35
    VIP Member Array varob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LaraCroft10 View Post
    He didn't violate my trust. I wasn't exactly stringent on it. At first I did say I wasn't going to tell anyone and didn't want him to, but then I told several people and kind of eased up on that, so I think he took the cue from me. He seemed pretty upset when he found out the things his mom said to me (the first time anyone has really showed opposition - and everyone else in his family is cool with it, some of them even want to go shooting with me), so I think from now on we're going to be more careful.

    Regarding taking her to the range....she could barely even be near me just thinking about me having a gun on me because she is scared of it, you really think the next step is taking her shooting? I don't think we're ready for that any time soon.
    LC, Sorry, after reading your OP I thought you specifically asked him to not say anything.
    Don't believe what you hear and only half of what you see!
    -Tony Soprano

  6. #36
    Senior Member Array RKflorida's Avatar
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    She sounds like a real dandy. We have a couple in my family and don't see them very much. My answer to her would have probably ended any chance of a relationship with her, your boyfriend, and that neighborhood. However, you might mention to her that you feel the need to carry because opinionated people ALWAYS become violent and you need a gun out of fear of them. Watch your boyfriend's face as you do this, it's like an IQ test.
    BTW, Did Devon stick up for you?

  7. #37
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    Lara, it sounds like we have some in-laws in common. It took me a few years to learn to ignore everything that comes out of my MIL's mouth. If you can't learn to do that, it will eat at you constantly.

    Glad you enjoyed the class. Be safe; be careful!
    Retired USAF E-8. Lighten up and enjoy life because:
    Paranoia strikes deep, into your heart it will creep. It starts when you're always afraid... "For What It's Worth" Buffalo Springfield

  8. #38
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    To put this simply, you're dating Devin, not his mother. What she thinks really doesn't matter in the end. This is your life to protect, and neither she, nor the police, nor anyone else may be there to do that for you if the time comes when in fact, you will need to do so. As James yeager is so fond of saying, "Your responsibility to be prepared for the fight never ends."

    Let the sheep be sheep. Peoples' ego is what typically stands in the way between where they are, and where they really could be. She probably thinks you're just a confused kid, and you'll "grow out of it." What you'd have a much harder time growing out of is being home-invaded, raped, beaten, or killed by an aggressor, or aggressors. It happens. It happens EVERYWHERE. I live in a really, really nice, upper middle class neighborhood. We had a string of car break-ins recently, then my neighbor acros the street had his house broken into while he was at a college football game with his wife (elderly couple) and the thieves stole his rifles, which he had secured in a safe in a closet, with the keys hidden at the opposite end of the house in another closet. (makes me think someone knew right where to look) after they got into his house by removing an AC window unit and going through that window.
    Now they hve a home alarm system (after the fact.)

  9. #39
    Member Array LaraCroft10's Avatar
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    Devin didn't know about our exchange until after we had left his brother's house (he was outside doing landscaping). I'm confident that if he was there, he would have vehemently stuck up for me. I'm going to talk to him about what he would say if she brought it back up with him. I know he's on my side. And I know he would stand up for me if necessary. He's admitted that guns aren't "his thing", but he's supportive in anything I do. We both know MIL can be a little overbearing, and he's got a good balance of indulging her to a degree, but he's not a pushover (thank GOD). We've actually talked a little bit this dynamic it in regards to if we get married and how this relationship would go. I know if his mother expressed to him how unhappy she was about me carrying, he would defend me. We do need to have the talk, though.

    I think I'm just going to feel this one out as I go. I got the feeling from the end of our conversation that she didn't even want to talk about it anymore, so maybe she'll just leave it alone. We'll see. Thanks for all your responses.
    Proud owner of a Sig Sauer P238 SAS Explosive Space Modulator.

    "I played the powerless in too many dark scenes. And I was blessed with a birth and a death, and I guess I just want some say in between." - Ani DiFranco, "Talk to me Now."

  10. #40
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    It's a bummer that she feels the way she does, but don't let it get to you. You have to do what you have to do. Since you can't carry where she lives anyway, it's really not an issue. I know it bothers you, and it hurt that she reacted the way she did, but you have to try to not let it bother you. I have no doubt that you can be more reasonable than she is being.

  11. #41
    Member Array LaraCroft10's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SmokinFool View Post
    It's a bummer that she feels the way she does, but don't let it get to you. You have to do what you have to do. Since you can't carry where she lives anyway, it's really not an issue. I know it bothers you, and it hurt that she reacted the way she did, but you have to try to not let it bother you. I have no doubt that you can be more reasonable than she is being.
    What I'm most afraid of is that I see her a lot at Devin's brother's house because they just had a baby. I can see her making a HUGE fuss about me carrying over there with a baby in the house (irrational, I know). I know I'm getting ahead of myself, and I know it will come down to how Devin's brother and his wife feel about it, but I can just see this getting really dramatic. Gah, I shouldn't think about that just yet. I wish she didn't know. :( It is what it is. Maybe if Devin and his family stop talking about it, she'll forget about it anyway...
    Proud owner of a Sig Sauer P238 SAS Explosive Space Modulator.

    "I played the powerless in too many dark scenes. And I was blessed with a birth and a death, and I guess I just want some say in between." - Ani DiFranco, "Talk to me Now."

  12. #42
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    You are doing this for the protection of you and your family. Your boyfriends mother just needs to suck it up and deal with it. Since you aren't married, she really has no say in the matter. When I got mine, if my inlaws had said anything negative I would have bluntly let them know that their daughter, my wife, fullly supported my decision.

  13. #43
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    My in-laws are rabid, anti-gun fanatics who will never acknowledge the right to keep and bear arms. Given that, it is a discussion we will never have.
    "If I had my choice I would kill every reporter in the world, but I am sure we would be getting reports from Hell before breakfast."
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  14. #44
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    Lara ([OP]), congratulations on taking and completing your CCW course. (Lest that accomplishment be lost in the din of the rest of this thread.)

  15. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by marcclarke View Post
    Lara ([OP]), congratulations on taking and completing your CCW course. (Lest that accomplishment be lost in the din of the rest of this thread.)
    Oh, that's right! That was the other half of the OP rationale. We were all so busy hammering on mom's reticence.

    Yes ... congrats.
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
    Explain: How does disarming victims reduce the number of victims?
    Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos).
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