Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves

This is a discussion on Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Originally Posted by dbglock We knew they were liberals and knew nothing good would come of them knowing. It's like telling conservative in-laws you support ...

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Thread: Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves

  1. #61
    VIP Member Array ccw9mm's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dbglock View Post
    We knew they were liberals and knew nothing good would come of them knowing. It's like telling conservative in-laws you support the right to abortion. Don't tell 'em squat if it's a hot-button topic.
    Agree. That's an important point. Preference to know, versus the need to know. It's the rare situation where someone truly needs to know such information like whether someone carries. IMO, it's like the location and even existence of a big safe inside the home, which is nobody's business for any reason, except those with legitimate need to know (ie, those needing actual access).
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
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  3. #62
    Senior Member Array The Old Anglo's Avatar
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    My Congratulations to you!!!. Keep going no matter what Anyone says,Nowhere is Safe anymore..Mayberry is Gone!. Always Carry,Never Tell. Stay Safe AND Armed!. Good Luck!.

  4. #63
    Member Array Gunsmoke16's Avatar
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    Congratulations on the carry class. I'm GLAD to see more wemen are getting out, educated and exercising the rights to protect themselves and loved ones (even the stubborn ones that won't believe until the wolf grabs them by the throat). Get the BF interested by taking him shooting and such. Once he's very enthusiastic about it ask him to invite mother-in-law to the range one day. Make sure to only use .22LR until she is comfortable and good ear muffs protection. Most that are against it, have never experienced it. You might also get some air-soft plastic pellet guns to PLAY with and give her one for a gift with a GENEROUS supply of ammo. Make sure to inspect your guns regularly for any signs of wear and keep them cleaned-not over-oiled as it can seep into a shell around the primer and cause it to not fire. Good places for supplies are cheaperthandirt.com, don hume leather goods, magills.com if you have a Glock, Ruger makes some good guns at reasonable prices and cabelas.com has tons of stuff for shooting/hunting/camping enthusiasts-just ask for a catalog. Good luck, burn some powder and keep smiling.

  5. #64
    Member Array LaraCroft10's Avatar
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    Update: I talked to the boyfriend about it. He told me he's intending to talk to his mom about the whole thing, because he was upset about how she came at me and doesn't appreciate her lecturing me like she did. He said he wants to explain to her why I feel the need to carry protection, how safe and responsible he's watched me be about it, and that he is supportive of my decision. I think she will be more receptive to him than to me. We also talked about carrying in his brother's house (the one with the baby), and he adamantly told me no, that his brother's wife would get REALLY upset and angry if she found out (and it's true...she would), which could happen accidentally if my shirt rode up or something. So I agreed to respect that. We also agreed that we're not going to tell anyone else about it. I guess we both just wrongfully assumed that I'm an adult, and he's my live-in partner, and if we're okay with it (and my own Democrat parents are), then everyone else will be. Lesson learned, indeed.

    I also want to reiterate that this is not a situation where I very clearly told him that I don't want anyone to know and he violated that. I never was very sold on keeping it a complete secret, myself. So when I told both my parents and several of my friends, he did, too. There are a couple of people I wish he hadn't told after the fact, and I told him so, and he apologized, but like I said, I never really set the boundary. We have done that, now.

    Also, he's not a mama's boy, definitely not. And like I said, we've already had the whole conversation about this MIL dynamic getting worse when we get married. We're both aware of it, and have talked about it.

    Thanks for the input, everyone.
    Bark'n, MrsHB, archer51 and 1 others like this.
    Proud owner of a Sig Sauer P238 SAS Explosive Space Modulator.

    "I played the powerless in too many dark scenes. And I was blessed with a birth and a death, and I guess I just want some say in between." - Ani DiFranco, "Talk to me Now."

  6. #65
    Member Array insman1132's Avatar
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    Unhappy

    Can a Grandpa add his two cents to your mother-in-law situation. If you plan on marrying this guy, you need to sit down and have a "come to Jesus" meeting with the mother-in-law as to when she can and when she cannot butt into your business. Your future husband needs to be there with you in full support of your position. Otherwise you are in for some real problems in your marriage. And if you future husband cannot stand up to his mother, you may want to re-think if he is really the right guy for you.

  7. #66
    Member Array LaraCroft10's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by insman1132 View Post
    Can a Grandpa add his two cents to your mother-in-law situation. If you plan on marrying this guy, you need to sit down and have a "come to Jesus" meeting with the mother-in-law as to when she can and when she cannot butt into your business. Your future husband needs to be there with you in full support of your position. Otherwise you are in for some real problems in your marriage. And if you future husband cannot stand up to his mother, you may want to re-think if he is really the right guy for you.
    Hey Insman, read my post right above yours - hopefully that will dispell any fear that he cannot stand up to his mom and that we are naive to the problems her strong personality might cause in the future. I completely agree with you!
    Proud owner of a Sig Sauer P238 SAS Explosive Space Modulator.

    "I played the powerless in too many dark scenes. And I was blessed with a birth and a death, and I guess I just want some say in between." - Ani DiFranco, "Talk to me Now."

  8. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by LaraCroft10 View Post
    As a side note: while I was gone all day doing this, boyfriend was doing family stuff, and told his family where I was.
    My first reaction: Why did he feel it was necessary to tell his family where you were? This is something that is your and his business and no one else's.

    Quote Originally Posted by LaraCroft10 View Post
    I also want to reiterate that this is not a situation where I very clearly told him that I don't want anyone to know and he violated that. I never was very sold on keeping it a complete secret, myself.
    Upon further reading: Ok, I read your last post and that explains a lot.
    Ben

    Cogito, ergo armatum sum. I think, therefore I am armed. (Don Mann, The Modern Day Gunslinger; the ultimate handgun training manual)


  9. #68
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    I would say to not bring it up, tell your MR. to do the same, and carry on. It isn't her business and if (heaven forbid) you ever have to save her bacon with you you can then pull the "told you so" card. Otherwise, I would drop it and attempt not to discuss it with her.
    BigJon


    "Better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt" ~ Mark Twain

  10. #69
    Member Array Shiphted's Avatar
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    Took my carry class yesterday + mother-in-law disapproves

    Hate to say it but antis will only be on your side when your saving there life or a close loved one. I've been in this position with my FIL an now he appreciates that I carry.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  11. #70
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    I didn't read all of the responses but as the old saying goes, "you can lead a horse to water..."

    l honestly believe that positive exposure is the best kind of thing for people like this. They are so used to all of the negative press that when they meet someone who actually knows what they are doing and are a-good example of gun ownership they don't know what to do about it. It's just too "OUT THERE!"... IMPOSSIBLE, REALLY!!

    I can understand how bad it feels to have someone you love treat you like you have the plague though. Both my aunt and my grandmother are all weirded out that I carry. I'm still waiting for the day when they will get over it. At least they've mostly stopped talking about it at EVERY. SINGLE. Family gathering. I'm still the black sheep but I can live with that. I just keep telling myself that they will at least start to see carriers in a more positive light because of my example. At least I hope so.

  12. #71
    Ex Member Array Piratesailor's Avatar
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    Boy Lara, you did generate a bunch of conversation. Good to hear you have a handle on it. As they say in OZ.. Good on ya.

  13. #72
    Member Array woodstock's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JonOxds View Post
    Congrats! I took the class from Greg also, and thought he did a great job. I live in the city & my permit took 19 days to process. There's a box on the form you'll fill out that asks what states you've lived in. From what I've heard, the more states the longer it takes to process your application. Mine had 5.
    Every state I'd lived in would take them forever!! When I was 19 and enlisting in the Air Force I had to list every address and every school. Back then there were 41 addresses and 18 schools! No, my family wasn't military. Since then I've added a few more during an Air Force career, not to mention a few countries.

    Is there a time limit at which they're required to issue at least a temp permit? In Virginia they only have 45 days.
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  14. #73
    Member Array BadHabit's Avatar
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    Glad you got your class done.

    As far as carrying- it is a need to know basis. I have seen it where with someone who bragged about carrying firearms concealed (Army LTC), thru total distortion of the truth, became branded as "gunslinger" and on occasion be the victim of unnecessary scrutiny. Luckily your possible future MIL is in another state and over time, hopefully she will stop her verbal diarrhea about you carrying.

    I distinctly remember one time my step-father stated he never saw me carrying. To which I replied "exactly". Operate in stealth mode, so to speak. A lot of people out there may like firearms but have a problem with someone carrying around them.

    I must ask- why doesn't your boyfriend concealed carry?

  15. #74
    VIP Member Array smolck's Avatar
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    Top Ten Things I Hear My Mother-In-Law Say To Me:

    10. "I wish my daughter would marry someone else"
    9. "I think you should try drinking and driving"
    8. "Hey fatso, maybe you should stop eating for a month"
    7. "Do the world a favor and die"
    6. "I hope I outlive you"
    5. "Not many men can look good with a bald spot, you ain't one of em"
    4. "It's a shame you had to be born
    3. "How drunk did you get my daughter in order to say yes to marrying you?"
    2. "When you start talking, I want to take this pencil, stick it into my own eye, swirl it around real good, and then die a million times"
    1. "Aside from my grandkids, everything you have ever done is bad"
    As Benjamin Franklin left the hall in Philadelphia, he was asked, “What kind of government have you given us, Dr. Franklin?” He replied: “A republic, if you can keep it.”

  16. #75
    Member Array LaraCroft10's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BadHabit View Post
    I must ask- why doesn't your boyfriend concealed carry?
    I guess he just doesn't feel he needs to. It's never really crossed his mind. I only decided I want to do this just over a month ago (geez, has it only been a month??), so maybe with time he'll decide he wants to, too, but I have a feeling it would take getting into a scary situation to make him realize it would be useful.

    @smolck: I'll take the gun-lecturing. She sounds like a real peach!
    Proud owner of a Sig Sauer P238 SAS Explosive Space Modulator.

    "I played the powerless in too many dark scenes. And I was blessed with a birth and a death, and I guess I just want some say in between." - Ani DiFranco, "Talk to me Now."

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