Should we care how we look?

This is a discussion on Should we care how we look? within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; I was grocery shopping with my wife and daughter. I witnessed a man open carrying. I have nothing against open carry or the people who ...

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Thread: Should we care how we look?

  1. #1
    Member Array CCinaG26's Avatar
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    Should we care how we look?

    I was grocery shopping with my wife and daughter. I witnessed a man open carrying. I have nothing against open carry or the people who do it, but it's just not for me. Obviously I was CCin at the time. Another women witnessed him doing so and confronted the man. (I do not know either of these people) The women out right asked him why the %$#@ he had a gun around all these people while shopping. She then went and got a manager and told the manager that the man with the gun should be removed. The manager told the women the man was not breaking any laws and if she felt uncomfortable, she should leave. She left. Think about this situation and answer my question honestly. NOTE: I am not judging the man who was open carrying and I did not involve myself in this situation and I have no reason to think the man was illegally in possession of his firearm and open carry is ok where this took place.

    The women overreacted, plain and simple, but I gave this situation a lot of thought. I honestly think if the same women had seen me open carrying, she would not have cared. I keep my hair short and shave every few days. I wear plain clothing with no logos. I still dress casual, but you could say I would be ready for an entry level job interview at any time. Cheap polo cheap button up shirts. I look, dress, and act very average and try never to draw attention to myself. The man who was OCing would fit into many stereotypes. I am not saying this is right or the man did anything wrong, but if this man walked up behind me in the street late at night, my hand would approach my glock. Again, what the women did was wrong and irrational, but I try and look at things from all points of view. In MY OPINION, the man looked like a thug.

    When we carry, we can agree, it changes our attitude and our mind set, but should it also change how we dress? I think so. What do you think?

    it would be unwise to think sheeple don't judge others by their appearance.

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  3. #2
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    It's possible that the woman would have complained if she saw you open carrying, even though you were dressed "nicely". Some people will complain no matter what the situation is and some people will complain whenever they see a gun. The manager acted correctly and it was up to the woman to decide whether she wanted to stay in the store or not.

    Since open carry is legal where he was carrying, how he was dressed is totally irrelevant. The law was written to allow open carry; not to judge how people dress. I'm sure someone will find something wrong with the way anyone else dresses.
    Ben

    Cogito, ergo armatum sum. I think, therefore I am armed. (Don Mann, The Modern Day Gunslinger; the ultimate handgun training manual)


  4. #3
    Member Array CCinaG26's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BenGoodLuck View Post
    It's possible that the woman would have complained if she saw you open carrying, even though you were dressed "nicely". Some people will complain no matter what the situation is and some people will complain whenever they see a gun. The manager acted correctly and it was up to the woman to decide whether she wanted to stay in the store or not.

    Since open carry is legal where he was carrying, how he was dressed is totally irrelevant. The law was written to allow open carry; not to judge how people dress. I'm sure someone will find something wrong with the way anyone else dresses.
    Just asking if we should take into account how we dress when we carry and I don't mean for comfort. I agree with everything you said about the law though.

  5. #4
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    If the woman believed the man was an unsavory sort based on his looks/attire and had the juice to just walk right up and confront him, she's not firing on all cylinders, and so I don't think that a nicely dressed and preened man would have made her feel any different. She liable to march right up to a gang full of thugs and order them to crank their music down, and then wonder why she's on the pavement getting her teeth knocked out.

    Kudos to the store manager.
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa

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    Member Array Naufragia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Betty View Post
    If the woman believed the man was an unsavory sort based on his looks/attire and had the juice to just walk right up and confront him, she's not firing on all cylinders, and so I don't think that a nicely dressed and preened man would have made her feel any different. She liable to march right up to a gang full of thugs and order them to crank their music down, and then wonder why she's on the pavement getting her teeth knocked out.

    Kudos to the store manager.
    My thoughts exactly. Well said.
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    VIP Member Array suntzu's Avatar
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    OP: Basically what you are saying is that folks should look like you , change their appearance to appease folks, and basically just not be themselves....in a polite way. I don't give a hoot how someone looks. I don't go for my gun every time someone is walking behind me that looks like a "thug". Maybe I have a tad more confidence in my ability. You know the problem with this country? Folks just don't know how to MYOB. The lady at the store did not, and quite honestly you are not. In fact, in this whole story the only person that has their head screwed on right (no offense, just a term) is the manager.

    Personally, you dress the way you want, and let others folks be. You already would most likely disapprove of what I look like when I was in NH OC'ing. Or maybe we should all dress and look lke Jeffrey Dahlmer...he did look like the boy next door.

    The point is folks should just get used to the fact that guns are OK.
    Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”
    And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

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  8. #7
    Member Array CCinaG26's Avatar
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    Maybe I should have said everything a little different. Do you guys and gals attempt to dress as plain as possible when Carrying in order to avoid attention?

  9. #8
    Member Array CCinaG26's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by suntzu View Post
    OP: Basically what you are saying is that folks should look like you , change their appearance to appease folks, and basically just not be themselves....in a polite way. I don't give a hoot how someone looks. I don't go for my gun every time someone is walking behind me that looks like a "thug". Maybe I have a tad more confidence in my ability. You know the problem with this country? Folks just don't know how to MYOB. The lady at the store did not, and quite honestly you are not. In fact, in this whole story the only person that has their head screwed on right (no offense, just a term) is the manager.

    Personally, you dress the way you want, and let others folks be. You already would most likely disapprove of what I look like when I was in NH OC'ing. Or maybe we should all dress and look lke Jeffrey Dahlmer...he did look like the boy next door.

    The point is folks should just get used to the fact that guns are OK.
    Not what I meant, Sorry if any of you think I care how you look. Is there a class I can take about how to ask questions in a way that won't offend anyone or make them think less of me, lol. I didn't say anything about going for my gun. I think I"ll go back to reading instead of posting.

  10. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by CCinaG26 View Post
    Maybe I should have said everything a little different. Do you guys and gals attempt to dress as plain as possible when Carrying in order to avoid attention?
    The common term for this is "grey man". I happen to be "grey" just because I'm of a personality type that doesn't like to draw attention to themselves.

    However, after 5 years in uniform, followed by over 20 years in suits, I'll be danged if I'm going to adjust my daily attire to look "swell". I can look a little rough at times and just don't care.
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    Member Array Boomerang's Avatar
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    Makes me think back to my 1st job. It was at a pet store and due to experience I was in charge of a lot of the meaner things (spiders, reptiles..).
    I was working and dressed for the job when I took large tarantula out of its plexiglass cage with my bare hands. I was just standing there, holding it as it slowly walked around my fingers.

    Next thing I know some lady comes walking by and see's me. She starts screaming at me at the top of her lungs from 3 feet away that I need to put it away NOW!!!!! scream scream screaming. I just stood there staring at her like she was insane.

    She turned and ran out of the store as fast as she could.

    It was a mostly harmess spider, the bite would have been like a pair of really bad bee stings. But to her it was the end of the world as spiders must be coming to get her.

    I went about my business like it never happened.

    One thing to remember I guess: Everyone see's the world differently based on too many variables to count.

    Doesn't mean they are right in their beliefs.

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    VIP Member Array Gene83's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CCinaG26 View Post
    Maybe I should have said everything a little different. Do you guys and gals attempt to dress as plain as possible when Carrying in order to avoid attention?
    To answer your question, personally I do...but that's just me. Working with the public, I see people every day and think to myself "Good grief, don't you own a mirror?" It doesn't matter whether they are carrying or not. Obviously, I'm from the generation that was taught when you left the house, to look like your momma raised you right.

    If you ever heard the words "You're not leaving this house dressed like that!!!!", you're probably from my generation.
    "The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come." ~ Confucius

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    Member Array Shiphted's Avatar
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    Criminals don't open carry.


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    Senior Member Array USM1976's Avatar
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    I'm curious after all the opinions some which have good thought. What did this Open Carrying person say during this woman's tirade ? Was she loud in her approach ? How did he respond to her ?

    The manager offered the proper solution to the situation.

    Quite frankly, I dress very causually about 99% of the time. No open carry here, but people do make judgement calls of people upon first sight...right or wrong...it's just the way it is even the people here.
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    I don't OC often but when I do, I am usually dressed "down" so to speak. I am usually working on a vehicle or cutting firewood or some other "grungy" activity. I don't much care what anyone thinks of my dress or appearance as I am about my business but, I can see where it may give the wrong impression to the type of person who makes judgements based soley on appearances. That is why I am careful to carry legally at all times. I can't always help what others assume about me, correct or not. And, as long as I know I am legal, I really don't care.

    Many folks talk about the "thug" look as an indicator of potential threat. I live in a working class area and rarely see suits and ties on my neighbors. More than a few dress in the hip-hop fashion and are just mirroring TV and movies. Some of these neighbors are folks I wouldn't step foot inside my front door and others I have had over for BBQ and beers. I guess what I am saying is that it isn't the appearance that sets my "spidey-sense" off. It can contribute but it is rarely the first thing that concerns me. I am far more concerned with body language when it comes to an early warning.

    The woman in the OP was a reactionary .... well I won't say what. She likely would have reacted no matter how the individual was dressed. That is occasionally part of the OC experience. Dressing in a more "professional" way may alleviate some of the knee-jerk reactions but there will always be people like the woman described.

    We all have to live our lives. If that includes OC then that means there will be times when we may not look our best in public. Act responsibly and respectfully to those around you (you do that anyway, right?) and I can't see where you have done anything wrong.
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    VIP Member Array Jetfuelrm's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gene83 View Post
    If you ever heard the words "You're not leaving this house dressed like that!!!!", you're probably from my generation.
    Oh how I do remember hearing it. I also remember getting whacked a few times for not listening.
    "As a strong supporter of our 2nd Amendment rights, I believe tougher enforcement of our nation's existing gun laws must be done before any more laws are enacted and put on the books."
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