need suggestions

This is a discussion on need suggestions within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; thanks for the input! It's always good to hear from the ladys as well. I think for now im gonna let it be and ask ...

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Thread: need suggestions

  1. #16
    Member Array ebk637's Avatar
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    thanks for the input!
    It's always good to hear from the ladys as well.
    I think for now im gonna let it be and ask that she at least learn how to effectively use pepperspray.
    I will run that by her tomorrow and see what she says.
    Its a start!

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  3. #17
    Member Array Biloxi Bersa's Avatar
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    Get a girlfriend. The downside of course, is when your wife finds out, she'll be a damn fine shooter.

    At that point, duck.

  4. #18
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    Thumbs up

    limatunes, I just want to say Thank You for your wonderful "ladies point of view" posts on this thread and others...you are a true asset to CombatCarry..(soon to be DefensiveCarry.com..)

    "I surrounded 'em"- Alvin York

    "They're ain't many troubles that a man can't fix with seven hundred dollars and a thirty ought six"- Jeff Cooper

  5. #19
    Member Array hayley's Avatar
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    My wife has agreed to take a basic pistol course this Spring--and recently expressed interest in concealed carry. Given what a big Lib she is, this is probably a miracle, but I think what helped a little is that I bought a revolver "for" her a few years ago. I mentioned it in passing conversation, which piqued some interest. I told her that she couldn't see it, however, til she learned about how properly to handle a firearm. Sometime later she brought-up the subject, we had a little handgun 101 session, and I got the S&W 431 and holster out of the safe. Anyhow subsequently, we've had lots of constructive conversations on the subject, so I don't know if my strategem has had any influence really. Good luck!

  6. #20
    Distinguished Member Array AKsrule's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ebk637 View Post
    Any suggestions on how to get my wife intrested in shooting and carrying.
    I will be attending my CPL class on saturday and could not convince her that it would be good for her also.
    she loves to shoot skeet with me and she has shot pistols before so I don't understand what the issue is.
    She has no problem with me carrying but I can't be with her and my kids all the time.
    Im not sure how to go about peaking her intrest without it seeming like im pressuring her.
    Or should I just let it be?
    Sounds like she just needs to find her own Reason to do it.

    How about you just offer her a deal- Do something she wants in
    return for her just getting her permit. She can still decide for
    herself if and when she carries.
    -------
    -SIG , it's What's for Dinner-

    know your rights!
    http://www.handgunlaw.us

    "If I walk in the woods, I feel much more comfortable carrying a gun. What if you meet a bear in the woods that's going to attack you? You shoot it."
    {Bernhard Goetz}

  7. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Team American View Post
    limatunes, I just want to say Thank You for your wonderful "ladies point of view" posts on this thread and others...you are a true asset to CombatCarry..(soon to be DefensiveCarry.com..)

    Happy to contribute!

  8. #22
    Member Array Ping Ping's Avatar
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    I've gotten about 8 women into shooting and most of those into CCW. Along with the many fine suggestions here, I'll add my little "trick".

    Women do NOT want an intimidating, testosterone charged experience. They dont want to feel like a "tag-along". They deserve to have the entire experience tailored to THEM. It doesnt hurt to let them in on the secret men hate; that women are better natural shots than we are.

    OK, off the soap box...

    I plan a range excursion at a time I know there wont be many others there. I choose a section of the range where there are no rifles and no large calibers a'blazin. I am sure to keep my tone and demeanor calm and quiet.

    Success is your best tool. Create a situation where they will achieve it! I take a bull bbl'd, Ruger 22/45 and LOTS of ammo. I set the target at 5yds. After dispensing with all the safety, functional stuff, grip, stance... I hand them the least intimidating hangun around. The looks I get after they've fired that first shot are priceless.

    Once they get shooting, I dont volunteer a lot of advice or pointers. I just let them shoot and the questions come pouring out. Once they feel the exhileration of hitting the target a few times, theyre hooked!

    I leave the hand cannons in the bag, or better yet, in the safe at home until they're completely comfortable with the .22, and literally begging to shoot something bigger. My current protege' wants nothing to do with anything other than .45acp! LOL! I've also got a little 14yr old who shoots my Glock 9mm better than I do! Look out Leatham!

    The only thing better than shooting, is shooting with a female friend!
    "Happiness, is a warm gun" -St. John of Liverpool

    Proud to be an infidel.

  9. #23
    Member Array Gary Brommeland's Avatar
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    PingPing pretty well nailed it. I have seen so many macho man types "teaching" their girlfriends/wives to despise shooting because of their approach. Nobody wants to be talked down to. Nobody wants to be made to feel inadequate. Nobody ( regardless of gender) benefits from such a negative experience.
    A video is a good way to cover the safety and shooting fundamentals part of it.
    Then a trip to a quiet spot in the woods with a .22 and some pop cans (and a safe backstop, such as a hillside) along with a picnic lunch will make for a low key, stress free introduction to shooting. Almost everyone who is introduced slowly and gently to the shooting sports walks away with a totally new understanding than what they had going into it. The key is to make it enjoyable and stress free.
    Once a woman (or any new shooter, for that matter) has mastered the basic shooting fundamentals (grip, stance, sight picture, breath control, etc) and has gained some experience, it is then time to hand them off to a professional trainer for defensive training. For some reason, all guys seem to think that they know what they are doing in this arena (and in my experience far less than 1% actually do). And of those who actually do, few of them have the teaching skills to pass it along to someone else.
    So, if you want your girlfriend/wife to enjoy shooting and progress to the point in which they are competent to defend themselves, less is more. Hand 'em over to a professional instructor as soon as they are past the "plinking" stage. (And choose the instructor well - avoiding the local "gunshop commandos" like the plague).

  10. #24
    Member Array sportkcjc's Avatar
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    Unfortunately if there is not a desire to ccw or even practice shoot you are fighting a loosing battle. Pick and choose the right battle. My wife for the first time in about 17 years expressed a desire to shoot. I think only because I'm introducing it to our 9 year old son. A P22 was purchased the next day. I'll offer to take her when I go to the range and mostly the answer is no. when it's yes, it's her time and I won't even shoot, I'll just work with her. Will she ever carry??? She will have to want to, I can't and won't pressure her. I would suggest that you do the same.

  11. #25
    Member Array Gary Brommeland's Avatar
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    Hi Everyone,

    This is Remy Brommeland, Gary's wife. I just wanted to add a few things to this thread from a woman's point of view. I am a ccw'r - but I hate to shoot - much to Gary's chagrin. I practice because shooting is a perishable skill, and I carry because we have kids. (Gary can't be with me all the time, or you guys would never get holsters! ) It just might be that she will never "want" to carry, but she has to realize that she NEEDS to carry.
    Here's what motivates a momma to carry a gun: Unless I were armed and properly trained, what would I do if someone grabbed one of my kids while we were shopping & running errands? Call home? Call 911 after it was all over? These are not acceptable options. As an adult and a parent, I consider being unarmed in todays violent society to be just as irresponsible as letting our kids play in traffic.

    When we are all together, it is Gary's job to keep us safe, but when he is not with us, that responsibility falls to me. It is a responsibility - nothing less, and to shirk it would be to fail my children. This may sound a bit extreme, but I'm a redneck Georgia girl and NOBODY is gonna hurt my kids without soaking up a bunch of lead first!

    I would also like to recommend that anyone carrrying a firearm get some better training than that lame class the state requires for carry permits. I actually got my first permit and was carrying long before I met Gary, but getting "in the business" made me realize how much I didn't know before, and how overly confident I had become. For example, we have these cute blue plastic guns in the holster shop, and the first time Gary had me "pull" one of them on him he scared me to death! I just blinked and it was gone ! I was 37 years old at the time and I screamed like a little girl!!! It made me realize that just having a gun was not enough. Take a class from a real instructor - it will make all the difference in actually being able to defend yourself (or your kids). Another thing that I learned from Gary - it is a common (and often fatal) mistake to confuse the willingness to defend yourself with actually having the ability to do so. It is easier to take the inevitable (and necessary) criticism from a stranger than someone you're gonna have to kiss later - when you might not want to! Plus, when you are in a class, everyone becomes a bit competitve and there is an enthusiasm when you are surrounded by a group of people all focusing on the same thing. It can actually be fun!

  12. #26
    VIP Member Array maclean3's Avatar
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    Great post Remy! I'm still trying to convince my wife to go to the range with me. I shoot with her brother at times and just found out last week that he shoots with his wife so maybe going as a group would mke it easier. After that I think it'd be easier to convince her to get the permit but that first step is the toughest.
    Jack

  13. #27
    pax
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    Senior Member Array pax's Avatar
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    To help her develop her own "need" to learn to shoot & defensive mindset, ask questions. Do not give her the answers! Just ask the questions, whenever the subject naturally comes up.

    For instance, if you're watching the news together & there's a story about someone who was attacked or robbed: "What do you think she should have done?" Then shut up. Bite your tongue, hard, to avoid filling in any answers. Just ask the question and shut up.

    Once she starts trying to answer the questions herself, and then starts asking the questions herself, it's only a small step from there to her looking for the answers. She's a smart person, so once she starts looking for the answers, she'll find them.

    But there's no point trying to give her answers when she hasn't learned to ask the questions yet.

    My .02.

    (Oh, and yeah, do have her stop by my site. :) )

    pax
    Kathy Jackson
    My website: Cornered Cat

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