Carrying to a friend's house

This is a discussion on Carrying to a friend's house within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Originally Posted by Bob O First, NOBODY I come in personal contact with except a member of this forum and my wife knows I carry. ...

Page 2 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 16 to 30 of 75

Thread: Carrying to a friend's house

  1. #16
    Senior Member Array DrLewall's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Drakes Creek, AR
    Posts
    958
    Quote Originally Posted by Bob O View Post
    First, NOBODY I come in personal contact with except a member of this forum and my wife knows I carry.

    I have a number of reasons for his. One of the main reasons is because of this very subject.

    I carry everywhere I can do so legally 24/7/365, including people's homes.

    My personal feeling on it is - "What they don't know, won't bother them". If the SHTF they may be glad I was carrying, if it doesn't - no harm/no foul.

    As always... just my opinion,
    Bobo

    BTW, there are a few other personal things I don't talk about to anybody besides whether I carry or not. Some things are just no one else's business.
    +1

  2. Remove Ads

  3. #17
    Distinguished Member Array Gideon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Missouri
    Posts
    1,764
    Just talked to my 12 and 7 year old girls about it tonight. I carry just about everywhere and everytime I legally can. But I don't share with anyone, period. My family knows because they see me come home and take off a suit coat and there it is. My wife doesn't like it but I'd told her (as kindly as possible) that it's my right and that I intend to do it and would like for it to not be an issue between us. She accepted that. I pastor a small country church and carry there. I'm extra cautious about concealment there as I believe it could cause some folks concern. If my carrying caused a stumbling block for one of God's people I'd have to consider no longer carrying at church. When I'm in a "sensitive" spot, I go with a Keltec P3AT in pocket carry and it would be almost impossible to be discovered.

    I don't even tell my close friends although I've had two close friends ask me if I've ever had CCW training. they know I like guns in general and must have figured that I would be the type to do so. I answered them truthfully but never volunteered beyond that point. If they ever ask me directly if I carry I intend to answer (with a big smile) with a question "would you ask someone what color underwear they're wearing?" I figure that'll make the point unless you have the type of friend who would ask!

    There's an old saying, if you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the questions. I wouldn't tell or volunteer so I wouldn't have to find out their reaction UNLESS it's the law, then it all boils down to your own judgement on how the relationship is. I would have to be VERY close and even them I wouldn't like it so I'd probably leave the gun in the car (something else I hate to do!)

  4. #18
    Ron
    Ron is offline
    Distinguished Member Array Ron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    West Linn, Oregon
    Posts
    1,628
    Provided it is legal, I have one rule which I always follow. If I know, or have reason to believe, that the person objects to bringing a gun to their house, I either leave my gun in my car or decline the invitation to visit. It is their house and they have the right to establish rules of conduct for visitors. IMO, it would be inappropriate for me to disregard their wishes. On the other hand, if I have no reason to believe they would object, then I will carry and not make a big issue out of it.

    Ron
    "It does not do to leave a dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him."

    J. R. R. Tolkien

  5. #19
    VIP Member Array goldshellback's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    OKC; by way of St. Mayberry, GA
    Posts
    4,750
    This is an intresting and educational thread.
    Generally I carry concealed (and I live in an open carry state) because it's my business and nobody elses......that's it. Having said that, I make no big secret I carry with those closest to me, ie. family and close friends.

    The wife of a real good friend of mine has made it clear that NO loaded guns will be in her house around her kids. It's a safty/fear of unknown for her more than anything. I honor her wishes. This past summer though her, her kids and me and my family went on a vacation while her husband (my buddy) was deployed with his unit. Now her and my wife are very good friends but I made a point of politely 'pulling her aside' (just us two) and informing her that while we were traveling and 'camping out' at the hotel I will be carrying and that I would positive control of my sidearm at ALL times. I told her I remember her expressing her "discomfort" of guns in general and that I was informing of my intentions out of respect of her and our friendship. Then she hit me with it......"I know you carry guns around and I'm OK with you having one, you know what your doing and I know the kids wont see or be able to get to it. Besides, I feel better with you here while (my husband) is gone." I almost fell over. She said that her and my wife already discussed it and my wife told her that ".....he'll almost never go anywhere without his 'buddy' tagging along....."

    Well how about that! I guess my next step is to get her husband to go get his CCL when he gets back......?
    "Just getting a concealed carry permit means you haven't commited a crime yet. CCP holders commit crimes." Daniel Vice, senior attorney for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, quoted on Fox & Friends, 8 Jul, 2008

    (Sometimes) "a fight avioded is a fight won." ... claude clay

  6. #20
    Administrator
    Array SIXTO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    19,655
    If you know these friends do not want guns in their home, I wouldnt disrespect their wishes in their own home.
    Look at it from their view... pick something out that you dont like, and dot want in your home... wouldnt you be miffed if a friend brought it in anyway? I would.
    I think the issue you have would be educating them to make sure they are comfortable with your gun, or finding a way around going to their home... or just enjoy your friends company and take the evening off.
    "Just blame Sixto"

  7. #21
    VIP Member Array tns0038's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,124
    When I said southerners are more gun friendly.

    YouTube - Southern Family Reunion
    have you seen this video?

  8. #22
    Distinguished Member Array LenS's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Commiechusetts
    Posts
    1,631
    Quote Originally Posted by Bob O View Post
    First, NOBODY I come in personal contact with except a member of this forum and my wife knows I carry.

    I have a number of reasons for his. One of the main reasons is because of this very subject.

    I carry everywhere I can do so legally 24/7/365, including people's homes.

    My personal feeling on it is - "What they don't know, won't bother them". If the SHTF they may be glad I was carrying, if it doesn't - no harm/no foul.

    As always... just my opinion,
    Bobo

    BTW, there are a few other personal things I don't talk about to anybody besides whether I carry or not. Some things are just no one else's business.

    I agree with your position 1000%!

    "Don't ask, don't tell!" is my motto. It is not a topic for discussion or debate (and luckily my state doesn't require "Mother May I" or "announcements"). Nobody except me knows when/if I am carrying and that is the way it will stay unless G_d forbid I ever have to use it.

    My Wife's friends are 100% liberals and would be unglued if they suspected that I carried. There are very few people who I would share that info with if asked . . . one friend I did tell recently and it didn't appear to be a problem even though she doesn't like guns.

  9. #23
    Senior Member Array mocarryguy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Heaven
    Posts
    578
    If you don't have friends, you don't have to worry about this stuff..
    I know, I know, you are smarter than me..just ask you..

  10. #24
    VIP Member Array cdwolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    MS
    Posts
    2,261
    I carry everywhere i can. THe area I live in is pretty safe(if there is such a place) but bad things and people happen everywhere. If they are friends of mine gun discussion is a topic.
    Like someone said earlier this is the deep south so everyone has a gun, and alot carry. I want my neighbors to know im armed and I want to know their armed or not. With the 2 on each side of me now (2 acre lots) I feel better for my wife when i'm not home. I have 5 friends that carry now because of me, well not because of me 2 of them were involved in a shooting this past year, and the others have come around to the idea "it is stupid to be a willing victim", in both cases bg's had guns, gg got lucky they don't know how to shoot. I would talk to them about their stance on firearms and carrying on the first card game.If their scared of a holstered weapon,respect ,try to explain why,leave it at your own( and theres and your wife's) risk!
    GUN CONTROL= I WANT TO BE THE ONE IN CONTROL OF THE GUN

    A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

  11. #25
    VIP Member Array friesepferd's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    east TN
    Posts
    2,341
    most of my friends know i carry.
    if i have any that dont that i dont think would be ok with it, i dont tell them.
    they wont find out anyways
    Wo die Notwehr aufhört, fängt der Mord an
    (Murder begins where self-defense ends)
    Georg Büchner

  12. #26
    VIP Member
    Array Thumper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Nevada
    Posts
    7,235
    I think I would go with the "don't ask - don't tell" approach unless you already know that they would not approve of you bringing a weapon in to their home. If that is the case or later, it becomes the case, I would respect their wishes.
    ALWAYS carry! - NEVER tell!

    "A superior Operator is best defined as someone who uses his superior
    judgement to keep himself out of situations that would require a display of his
    superior skills."

  13. #27
    Distinguished Member Array LenS's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Commiechusetts
    Posts
    1,631
    Quote Originally Posted by Thumper View Post
    . . . unless you already know that they would not approve of you bringing a weapon in to their home. If that is the case or later, it becomes the case, I would respect their wishes.
    Sadly, if one followed this philosophy in the Northeast . . . you wouldn't carry anywhere (or hardly anywhere)!!

    In liberal lands, most are ignorant about guns and fear them "going off" (that's what the media here report all the time) in an uncontrolled manner . . . unless being in possession of LEOs.

    I might have an advantage around here as I got into guns (and CCW) in 1976 and became a PT LEO in 1979. So a lot of acquaintances and friends have either seen me in uniform (local) or know/suspect that I own guns due to this fact and they may not make a big deal about it. Nobody around me has ever made an issue of it with me or asked.

  14. #28
    Senior Member Array Natureboypkr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Raleigh-Durham, North Carolina
    Posts
    1,046
    Quote Originally Posted by SIXTO View Post
    If you know these friends do not want guns in their home, I wouldnt disrespect their wishes in their own home.
    Look at it from their view... pick something out that you dont like, and dot want in your home... wouldnt you be miffed if a friend brought it in anyway? I would.
    I think the issue you have would be educating them to make sure they are comfortable with your gun, or finding a way around going to their home... or just enjoy your friends company and take the evening off.
    Im with you on that one, if your friend doesn't want firearms in his or her home then you shouldn't bring them out of respect.
    Mixed Martial Arts Record= 2-0.......Kyokushin Karate Record=5-0

    USMC.....helping enemies of America die for their countries since 1775

  15. #29
    Distinguished Member Array kazzaerexys's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    1,838
    Quote Originally Posted by Natureboypkr View Post
    Im with you on that one, if your friend doesn't want firearms in his or her home then you shouldn't bring them out of respect.
    I will say that I don't face this issue (Maryland sucks!), and have not given it enough thought yet to have formed my opinions.

    The thing is, though, it is about more than just respecting a friend's opionion. Oh, sure, if your only reason to carry to Bob's house is because you can and you are basically making a deliberate choice to spite Bob's wishes, then that's wrong. If Bob hates the color red I am not going to wear my red sweater over to his house just to torque him off.

    But the red sweater will never be the thing that stops the BGs who choose to bust in while I am visiting, and the whole reason for carrying the gun is to be ready for the situation that we all know will be unpredictable.

    So, while I can't fault the person who consciously decides to disarm out of respect for the host, I also can't really find fault in the "don't ask, don't tell" approach, either.

    If a MD carry permit were to magically appear in my wallet (and there being no specific law requiring me, that I know of, to announce to a provate property owner), there's nobody I would visit who I believe would absolutely insist that I not carry, and so I would probably just rely on concealed is concealed...
    “What is a moderate interpretation of [the Constitution]? Halfway between what it says and [...] what you want it to say?” —Justice Antonin Scalia

    SIG: P220R SS Elite SAO, P220R SAO, P220R Carry, P226R Navy, P226, P239/.40S&W, P2022/.40S&W; GSR 5", P6.

  16. #30
    Senior Member Array Paladin132's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    West Virginia
    Posts
    528
    Concealed is concealed. I don't announce, and anyone who told me that it wasn't welcome, well I just won't go there anymore. That's just how I feel about it, of course, but that's how I feel. Most of my friends are LEO / Military or something along those lines so its never been an issue.

Page 2 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast

Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. Re-arming at a friend's house when...
    By EvilMonk in forum Carry & Defensive Scenarios
    Replies: 43
    Last Post: March 12th, 2011, 07:20 AM
  2. Almost made at a friend's house
    By ExactlyMyPoint in forum Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: January 15th, 2011, 07:25 PM
  3. Replies: 53
    Last Post: August 18th, 2010, 11:12 PM
  4. carrying around the house
    By newconvert in forum Defensive Carry Holsters & Carry Options
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: November 2nd, 2008, 09:15 AM
  5. Carrying with neighbor's kids, friend's house
    By JohnKelly in forum Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions
    Replies: 52
    Last Post: June 21st, 2006, 08:15 PM

Search tags for this page

can i legally carry on friends property

,

concealed carry friend's house

,

friend brings concealed gun my house

Click on a term to search for related topics.