THE Discussion- Concealed Carry
This is a discussion on THE Discussion- Concealed Carry within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Last weekend found my wife and I over at some folks home for a get together. Two other couples plus us - all have known ...
March 19th, 2008 03:50 PM
THE Discussion- Concealed Carry
Last weekend found my wife and I over at some folks home for a get together. Two other couples plus us - all have known each other for awhile but not close friends. Anyway the conversation somehow wandered onto shipping products to your house. One of the guys owned a few UPS stores in a smaller city not to far from us. Stories started to pop up regarding things people shipped and I happened to mention that I had received a 1,000 round package of 45 ACP through UPS and the delivery guy had commented on how much it weighed. The store owner looked at me and told me that was illegal.
I smiled and said that in fact it wasn't and gave him a legal primer and a few well known sites to check on - both from a legal standpoint and from retailers such as Midway USA who do this legally all the time. I should have stopped there but mentioned I recently had a rifle shipped from Alaska to my local gun store which is a FFL. They didn't quite understand how all this works but were interested. Anyway, thats when THE question came up - " You don't carry a gun, do you?"
I have had my permit for a year and like most of you don't advertise or tell others that I carry. No ones business. However, and maybe because this came out of the blue with nice people that I know, I was caught a bit off guard. My response however was a quick and confident " Yes, I do and I do so legally and with a great deal of Responsibility". There was dead silence for a few seconds and then a number of questions. I could tell from the body language and questions that one guy didn't really care but the other could not understand why I would carry. It never turned into a heated argument but I laid out what responsible carry is about, how I want to take care of my family/myself, that its not about being a vigilante and defending all those around you and ultimately when seconds count that most likely a LEO is not going to be there for you.
All in all it went pretty well. My wife told me later on that she was proud of the way I handled the conversation and how I stood my ground. These are good people but not at all individuals comfortable around firearms. Probably did not convert anyone but thats not what I was trying to accomplish. I did learn a valuable lesson. If asked in the future if I carry ( outside of a LEO on a traffic stop or a really close friend ) I will probably reply - " Its like sex, religion, and politics - sometimes there is just not a need for you to know". However, I am interested in what your experience have been when this comes up and how you have dealt with similar situations.
March 19th, 2008 04:13 PM
Unless they get heated up (or I believe the gal/guy is actually looking for answers), I try to lighten it up with something like "Well a cop is too heavy to carry, and I couldn't afford the overtime for an off-duty one anyway."
Sometimes it works. Nothing else I have tried ever worked.
I'm just one root in a grassroots organization. No one should assume that I speak for the VCDL.
I am neither an attorney-at-law nor I do play one on television or on the internet. No one should assumes my opinion is legal advice.
Veni, Vidi, Velcro
March 19th, 2008 04:20 PM
As a general rule, I won't go there. On occasion, when someone tells me that they're interested in getting a permit I might say "I know a guy who... went to or said that etc." then answer their question but not tell them that guy is me.
Mostly though, I stick to my signature.
ALWAYS carry! - NEVER tell!
"A superior Operator is best defined as someone who uses his superior
judgement to keep himself out of situations that would require a display of his
March 19th, 2008 04:25 PM
you responded EXACTLY how I responded the first time that question was 'popped' on me....now you will have time to formulate a canned answer....whatever YOU want it to be and store that in your mind, for the next time...there is ALWAYS a next time.
--people ask why I carry, and I show them this picture. I think it says it all.--
NRA Certified Instructor--many disciplines
March 19th, 2008 04:47 PM
I actually hadn't thought of this yet. My permit is currently being processed, so I guess this is a good time to think about what my answer would be. Here are some possibilities I came up with, some real, some facetious (though tempting):
1. "Carry a gun? Why would I do that?" (This has the benefit of not being a lie, why giving an impression that I don't carry.) Then you change the subject.
2. "Why? Do you?" (Maybe they're a fellow sheep-dog)
3. "You're not one of those gun nuts are you?"
4. "Get away! Guns are baaaaaad! Just like free speech, free press, free religion, etc..."
5. "You know, I'd thought about it, but then I remembered that nothing bad ever happens to good people and that I just shouldn't worry about it."
6. "No, I don't have a gun, or a spare tire in my car, or smoke detectors, or a fire extinguisher, or an umbrella, or a jacket, or an alarm system, or a flashlight, or hurricane shutters, or a pool fence, or antivirus software, or a cell phone, or OnStar, or Rogaine. What do you think I am? Paranoid?"
7. "No, I'm hoplophobic."
8. "Nope, I'm fiercely loyal to whatever just or unjust regime happens to be in control of our government and love that they might eventually come to control every aspect of my life."
So, I'd love to hear the ones you guys who've carried for a while use. Or is it better to just lie?
March 19th, 2008 04:54 PM
Assuming friends, not just casual acquaintances, if asked, I respond truthfully.
It seldom "comes up" though, and most of my friends, except those that also carry, don't know.
March 19th, 2008 05:12 PM
I have a very small circle of close friends, so I can count on one hand the number of people that know (not counting my wife or father).
That said, I'm a vocal supporter of gun rights and always up for a good debate so some folks might think I do, but it's never come up directly.
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.
NRA Life Member
March 19th, 2008 05:17 PM
Sounds like you handled it well.
Most everyone of my friends know that I carry, I do not try to hide it from them, but people I do not know have NO idea.
March 19th, 2008 05:40 PM
"No, I'm hoplophobic."
I like that.
I prefer not to let anyone know I'm carrying. If that means I have to lie, so be it.
March 19th, 2008 05:47 PM
this came up today when i was talking to a guy at work (who has his ccw and i always talk guns with him because he knows his stuff) well another employee overheard and asked me why i thought i want to carry a gun. I told him how i dont feel like letting myself ever become a victim, but then gave him the other reasons for a ccw, like ease of traveling to the range, or purchasing a new/used pistol etc. etc. I have a feeling he thought i was paranoid, but thats ok, he just said ok, i was just wondering and i didnt know how all that worked. He is not one to voice an opinion that could cause heated debate but thats ok. A different older lady that works here heard me say how it would be on my hip and she just thought i was kidding because "you cant do that" oh well nobody notices when i have my holster to break it in, i doubt anyone will notice if there was an XDSC in that holster either.
March 19th, 2008 05:50 PM
All my friends know I carry and none have a problem but I live in TEXAS
March 19th, 2008 06:36 PM
Our Men of the Church group meets once a month for a meal and a short program. Last month the speaker was the same instructor that I had taken my CWP class under and was speaking on how to get your CWP and also about his Faith and Carrying a gun. Since the Preacher had announced what the program would be about in church Sunday we had a larger than normal turnout.
The questions and discussions were quite good. I asked the speker if he remembered me and he said yes but wasn't going to say anything because many people don't want anyone to know that they have a permit. I said it didn't matter with me and several people asked me about it and nothing negative was said by anyone. It was just something that everyone seemed to understand and some made arrangements to get their CWP and a few said that it didn't matter to the one way or the other. It was just a group of men getting together to discuss another subject like boating safety, probates, or bible stories that we have covered at one time. Nothing special.
If you think this an unusual reaction I would say that it would probably be the same for any men's group in the area. As for the makeup of the group there are some professional working men, business owners, a few college professors, two retired ministers and several other retired men from various backgrounds.
It just wasn't a big deal.
March 19th, 2008 06:53 PM
I'm still a few months away from my permit, but I have been thinking about how to deal with this situation if / when it comes up. I think I've decided to lie & "just say no", then maybe add something like what agentmel wrote.
I've only got two exceptions planned (and only when directly asked, except where required by law):
2. Property owners
I've written elsewhere here that I believe the rights to self-defense & private property are fundamental and co-equal. I don't want to debate that here, but I bring it up to explain why I will answer the question if asked by a property owner. I refuse to be a hypocrite on these issues, so I'll accept the possible conflict that may arise by my disclosure.
"It is only as retaliation that force may be used and only against the man who starts its use. No, I do not share his evil or sink to his concept of morality: I merely grant him his choice, destruction, the only destruction he had a right to choose: his own." - John Galt, from Atlas Shrugged
March 19th, 2008 07:38 PM
I'm a campus leader for Students for Concealed Carry so it comes up a lot for me. I don't advertise that I carry but I recognize that by putting myself in the spotlight more people are going to know or suspect that I carry than a normal person. This doesn't concern me that much since in most cases where I would need my pistol I would just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time so the BGs won't know that I'm carrying. I also believe that my "cause" is worth the added risk especially since it is in my opinion that risk is minor.
When I am asked I will usually tell people I have my permit but I never reveal if I am carrying or not, other than when required to.
March 19th, 2008 07:49 PM
I wonder if not being honest and bold about your 2A rights leaves a void in the much needed area of informing the masses? Not to interject religion into this forum but as a Christian, I share my faith when the opportunity arises, why not stand bold for the cause of our right to keep and bear arms?
I have not been asked THE question but have had the opportunity to discuss the issue of carrying weapons with others. It goes pretty well and you never know who you may convince. Sure there are arguments that you just left yourself open to the crazy guy in the corner who never talks to anybody and will now take you out first on his soon to be executed rampage. But I think that type of risk is slim compared to the potential benefit of offering truth to the uniformed.
I don't mean you have to wear pro-gun t-shirts and hats with your CCW/CHL taped to your forehead but when asked, turn it into an opportunity to inform the sheep. They probably just assume everyone around them thinks like they do. Letting them know, gently but boldly may make them realize they really don't know everything about the issue. It also gets them to realize that their supposed majority view just shrunk by at least one person and, heaven forbid, there may be more just like you out there!!
The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. 'Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?' 'No Ma'am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle.'
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