Girlfriend NOT happy about me carrying - Page 5

Girlfriend NOT happy about me carrying

This is a discussion on Girlfriend NOT happy about me carrying within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Withing the first two weeks of getting my permit, my wife accused me of being obsessed because I was breaking in a new holster (x2 ...

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  1. #61
    VIP Member Array Sticks's Avatar
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    Withing the first two weeks of getting my permit, my wife accused me of being obsessed because I was breaking in a new holster (x2 now) and always had the weapon near me.

    I started talking to her about the fact that you can not pick and choose the moments that you would be attacked and that she should start keeping the house gun with her when I am at work or out of town. She replied with "I refuse to live in my own house and act like a paranoid victim!"

    "When someone breaks into the house when you are home alone, then you will be the victim, and don't think that if you are upstairs that you will make it to the basement to get the gun before they get you."

    It was about that time that our quaint little town started having daylight break ins on a daily basis...two blocks away.

    She may or may not think that I am still obsessed, I do not know, for she makes no comment about it. I call it situation resolved.

    To the OP, I do not know you, or your girlfriend, so my giving any advice would be inconsiderate at best, so please do not take the following very seriously.

    Personally if it were me, "This is who I am, I don't try to change you, please do not try to change me." And for entertainment purposes, if she gets cranky about it, "Why don't you come down off your cross, build a bridge with the wood, and GET OVER IT!"
    Sticks

    Grasseater // Grass~eat~er noun, often attributive \ˈgras-ē-tər\
    A person who is incapable of independent thought; a person who is herd animal-like in behavior; one who cannot distinguish between right and wrong; a foolish person.
    See also Sheep


  2. #62
    Senior Member Array press1280's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by polardaddy View Post
    my ex-wife was horrible, she'd wait until we were out in a crowded area and almost shout," Good God are you carrying? why do you feel the need to carry a gun!" we did that once, I told her to never ever ever do that again. My present g/f soon to be wife prefers me to carry when we go to some of the less then stellar areas. go figure
    Mine also thinks that way too,that somehow people will know when to carry and when not to,and that only if you're going through seedy areas should one carry. Of course the other day some thuggish-looking guys came into the Subway restaurant we were at and asked if I was carrying. I said no,because we were on the way to NJ to visit her folks.........go figure.
    "The right of the whole people, old and young, men, women and boys, and not militia only, to keep and bear arms of every description, not such merely as are used by the militia, shall not be infringed, curtailed, or broken in upon, in the smallest degree..."
    Nunn v. State GA 1848

  3. #63
    VIP Member Array JimmyC4's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mr.stuart View Post
    If you really want to carry,tell her how and why you do it,one time!If that does not work,I would run.To marry the wrong person is miserable.

  4. #64
    Member Array 45MINK's Avatar
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    Get A New Girlfriend !!!!!!!!! Lol ....look For One That Already Has Her Own Gun

  5. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by hcrum87hc View Post
    My gf and I have discussed me carrying several times. I plan on getting my CWP in July, and I've been trying to get her to be okay with it, but I think that may be impossible. I've expressed to her several times that I'm only getting it b/c I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something bad happened to one of us (her in particular) that I was able to prevent but didn't. She keeps telling me that I would never need it and it just makes her uncomfortable to think I have a gun on me. I keep responding that many people never think they need it until it's too late and something's already happened. Unfortunately, she's very naive to what goes on in the world. Even though she knows there are evil people out there that wouldn't hesitate to hurt her, she thinks that it can't happen to her. What could I possibly tell her to help her see the truth?
    if you haven't already, take her out shooting. let her start small with something like a .22lr so that she can see that with training, practice, and a half a brain people can be safe with firearms. hopefully she starts to come around.

  6. #66
    Member Array hcrum87hc's Avatar
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    Wow, thanks for all the advice. I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to carry everywhere. For the times she doesn't like it, I could always get an LCP and a pocket holster. Also, I got my first pistol yesterday. It's a bi-tone XD40 sc. My dad got one two days before (knowing that I've been wanting one for months) and they had one left. He took me over there and got it for me since I'm still not 21. He was just given some money from my grandmother, who sold some land, and decided to buy me a gift. I told my gf I was going to get it and that there was a chance it would be gone. When I called her after getting it, she asked politely if I got it, and I said yes. She actually said, "Well good. I'm glad they still had it." This was a shock.

    I think the biggest problem she's had with me carrying is when I first decided to carry and I told her about it, she said she didn't like the idea. Me being the guy I am simply told her that I'm sorry she felt that way and I was gonna do it anyways. That made her really upset b/c she said I didn't care what she thought. The fact is, I care what she thinks, but I care more about her safety. Also, because of what Lima said, I've been trying to show her that she's more important to me than guns, and it seems to be having a great effect.
    Last edited by hcrum87hc; April 27th, 2008 at 03:09 AM.
    "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him."-Jeremiah 17:7

  7. #67
    Member Array Maxx's Avatar
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    Girlfriends come and go.
    They don't do much good if some jerk kicks in your door at 1:00 AM.
    They are also easily replaceable. In case she is super hot, get the gun and just don't tell her about it.
    Last edited by Captain Crunch; April 27th, 2008 at 12:58 AM. Reason: Deleted a language workaround.

  8. #68
    Member Array TravisABQ's Avatar
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    You'd better hope she doesn't someday decide to teach you what LAUTENBERG means.

    --Travis--

  9. #69
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    You're gonna love that XD.......

  10. #70
    VIP Member Array grady's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hcrum87hc View Post
    The fact is, I care what she thinks, but I care more about her safety.


    +10 for doing what is important instead of what is convenient.

  11. #71
    Senior Member Array youngda9's Avatar
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    You'll soon learn that it's easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission

    Best of luck with your lady.
    Speak softly, and carry a big stick.

  12. #72
    Senior Member Array Scot Van's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hcrum87hc View Post
    My gf and I have discussed me carrying several times. I plan on getting my CWP in July, and I've been trying to get her to be okay with it, but I think that may be impossible. I've expressed to her several times that I'm only getting it b/c I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something bad happened to one of us (her in particular) that I was able to prevent but didn't. She keeps telling me that I would never need it and it just makes her uncomfortable to think I have a gun on me. I keep responding that many people never think they need it until it's too late and something's already happened. Unfortunately, she's very naive to what goes on in the world. Even though she knows there are evil people out there that wouldn't hesitate to hurt her, she thinks that it can't happen to her. What could I possibly tell her to help her see the truth?
    The beautiful thing is that she's your GF and you won't have to go through any legal hassle to get rid of her. Be glad you didn't marry and find someone who 'gets it'.
    A man in the hands of his enemies is flesh, and shudderingly vulnerable. - author unknown

  13. #73
    Member Array OzarksMagic's Avatar
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    I had a similar problem, I ended up just doing what I wanted. I don't sit around and talk about it, I don't make a big deal of it. My wife can ignore and pretend I don't even own a gun, she does too! It is your desicion, just be a man and do it! Just don't talk about it all the time, and be responsible. Stay concealed and don't leave gun stuff all over the house. After awhile, I guarantee she will see you are responsible. It will become a non-issue. If you ever need it, she WILL be glad you had it. Many ladies actually end up liking the extra feeling of safety. It's your job to protect, whether she "likes" it, or not. Sheep Dog up! Good luck, stay safe. Clark
    Kel Tec P-32 .32
    Grendel P-10 .380

  14. #74
    Member Array Glock30SF's Avatar
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    Well I only read some of this but if I read correct you are 21 or almost? If that is the case let me say the harsh reality is you will probably not be with this girl in 10yrs(probably less). So with that in mind carry 100% of the time. If you do marry her let me intro my 5 year test to you. After marriage DO NOT have any kids for a min of 5 years!!! If you follow this advice pm me after that for my address to send the reward to

  15. #75
    Member Array rmarcustrucker's Avatar
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    i know it's a broken record (plastic thing that used to play music) already, but it's not PC to think that this won't be your wife. If she isn't on board with this, then what else are you two "off" on.
    I've heard the 4 things most argued about in marriage are:
    1. MONEY-(no duhh) (save spend, dept.....)
    2. Kids (to have or not to have)
    3. In-laws (is 1 block or 1000 miles good for in-law to your house?)
    4. Religion, politics, ethics (and gun beliefs)

    Women are famous for trying to "change" the guy, after marriage. (they make country songs on this) and men just think that we can "logic" our way with most issues.

    News flash. Doesn't always work out that way. Many marriages end in divorce.
    I've told this to many a bachelor on his bachelor party night (drove limo part-time for 8 years). "Treat your wife like a leased car, you can't add options to her, she's AS/IS." So if you like having a pro-CCW women and she isn't you might get lucky and changer her but I doubt it.

    Just my little .02

    PS. Happily married 10+ years and she's told me on several occasions: "God, I'm happy knowing that you where armed." She doesn't even need to ask anymore.

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