Those who may have followed or be following my assistance to Sue with her recent handgun aquisition and training may be interested to hear how I dealt with one (main) aspect of mindset - tho I doubt it is in any way original.
I spoke in depth to Sue - as I would to anyone considering carry. I had to establish whether she could sleep easy with the knowledge that, if she had to use her gun then like as not - she may well take a life. Could she handle that? Her first answer was a ''yes'' but not a very positive one. I was not convinced.
We talked further and when I actually presented her with the structure of a lethal force situation - she was able to realize that she would be the secondary component - the defender - if you will, the enforced responder as she would be protecting her life.
Bottom line question I put was - ''who started it''?? By which I mean, she or anyone carrying - is forced into a situation by another once all retreat options are used up - it is a scenario of the BG's choosing and so consequences are thus due to him for that express reason.
She thought further and agreed - indeed, she would be the one ''boxed in'' - ''in a corner'' - and so her decision would be totally mandated by the choice of that other. Therefore were there to be a loss of life - it would be, even if of her doing, merely a response that was necessary.
By time we had finished discussing this she was decidedly at ease with the whole concept and I felt she would be able to face anything should it occur.
I do regard mindset as essential for folks to get straight - otherwise they may freeze or just delay a response - which could be fatal.