What about when your kids aren't around you or a CCW spouse?

What about when your kids aren't around you or a CCW spouse?

This is a discussion on What about when your kids aren't around you or a CCW spouse? within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Hey guys/gals... I'm new here, and I really like the site. My work keeps me pretty busy, but I try to give some time every ...

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  1. #1
    New Member Array Revolvinator's Avatar
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    What about when your kids aren't around you or a CCW spouse?

    Hey guys/gals...

    I'm new here, and I really like the site. My work keeps me pretty busy, but I try to give some time every week or so to catch up on a couple of boards.

    My questions concerns your children. Plenty here share the mindset that they carry precisely for the reason that you never know when you'll need it. How do they deal with the fact that they or their spouse can't always be there with their children? For example, while they're in school, going to the mall with friends, sleeping over at a friends house, playing outside, and so on and so on....

    I'm about to become a father, and while the days of my child being away from us aren't here yet, I'm still trying to plan how I'll deal with it when it arrives.

    Thanks for the advice/comments/help...


  2. #2
    VIP Member Array Bud White's Avatar
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    0Theres not much you can do about it sometime its just out of your control

  3. #3
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    Array P95Carry's Avatar
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    Welcome

    True enough - sad to say there will by default be many times kids are away from your protection. It is that fact which for me makes some restrictive carry aspects pretty dumb - because if you or spouse not there to protect them - be darned nice to know that other folks elsewhere can. In schools tho of course - no dice.

    I think at very least - teach kids to be situationally aware - don't let them learn condition white. That alone could save them in a crisis, when other kids maybe are happily up in the clouds!! Daresay too as kids grow up - some degree of tuition as well on defensive techniques - anything to give them an edge.

    My kids are long gone and my step-kids are nearly the same - but it is a matter for some concern.
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


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  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Euclidean's Avatar
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    Well if they're in my classroom, I'll lock the door, pile them up in the corner, and I do have a stout wooden stool I can swing and I'll take the first bullet... no guarantees after that.

    Honestly I'm not joking. I've thought about this. I had a college professor who related the story of a colleague who took a bullet in her career. One of our informal assignments was we had to resign ourselves to what we would do in that situation. I decided I may be helpless to stop a school shooting, but I couldn't live with myself if I didn't try.

    I do park near the door and have the spare CCW in the vehicle, but by the time I got out there, got the lock off the darn thing, and got back in it could be too late, not to mention if I have a class in there I have to keep them safe and not play cowboy.

    The good news is that I know 3 ways to get kids out of this room, 2 of which would not be immediately obvious to someone who hadn't cased the school beforehand. The problem is those 2 backup plans depend on someone else being there to unlock a door I don't have a key to.

    The architecture of the building can help too. The external doors save for one are locked and there's no way to quickly force entry without either making a lot of noise or being seen. There is a security barrier in the hall that can be dropped and I jumped through the bureaucratic loops to get the key to activate it. The doors to the rooms lock and the doors are good and solid. The walls are brick, which won't stop a lot of things but it's probably about like being surrounded by sandbags.

    I figure I'll get shot and after that the kids are screwed. I'm not letting some psycho do anything to them as long as I'm breathing. I don't think it will ever happen but I've resigned myself to it.

    It does help there's often a police car parked right in front of the school, even if there's not always an officer present. Even then, officers assigned to campus duty are not armed.

    But you know what, you might get killed when a micrometeorite falls from the sky and punches through the roof and hits you in the head and kills you. You just gotta live life sometimes and accept you can't be prepared for every contingency.

  5. #5
    Member Array Gary Brommeland's Avatar
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    Welcome aboard!

    As has been previously stated, sometimes things are just out of your control. If your kids are in public school, they are (in most cases) at the mercy of a bunch of liberal fools (I mean this at the administrative level - the only folks with any commen sense that I've encountered in public education were some of the teachers themselves). The institutional/bureaucratic mindset is that guns are bad and only bad people have them. Consequently, most states have made it illegal (usually a felony) to carry on a campus, even w/ a concealed carry license.
    After seeing some of the garbage being taught by government schools, my wife and I decided to homeschool our kids. The school massacre in Russia simply served to confirm that it was (for us) the right decision. It will require a down-sizing of your standard of living and some personal sacrifice, but in the end you'll have total control over the quality of your kids' education, and their personal safety as well.
    As far as their being away w/ friends, this is where it gets scarey. I just have not met very many people who take the possibility of being attacked at home very seriously Consequently, at best most folks "have a gun" someplace, but do not have it immediately accessable nor possess the necessary training to successfully employ it if needed. For this reason, I encourage my kids to invite their friends over to our place whenever possible. Beyond that, I say a prayer over them whenever they leave the house and try to ignore that gnawing feeling in my gut when they aren't here. Good luck.

  6. #6
    Member Array Scott F's Avatar
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    Wife is learning to carry. My kids are all old enough to carry but I have grandkids. I pray a lot and so far that has worked.

    About the school thing. I carry whenever I go to school my grandkids school. Some there know it as they are close friends. It is legal in Oregon.

  7. #7
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    Array Betty's Avatar
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    Kids are a few years away for me, but I've thought about it.

    We're not around our kids all the time to protect them, but I believe that if we give them good guidance, they can make wise decisions. Teaching kids the basics on what to do and what not to do can help ensure that they avoid trouble. Kids can be too young to fully understand the dangers around them, and then they go through the "invincible" teenager period, but there are basics that kids can learn, like "don't help the stranger find his missing cat by getting into his car."

    I remember in high school a few of the girls carried mace (one even ruptured in class, evacuating the room). Kids may be too young and too inexperienced for many types of weapons (not to mention the legal problems of having them at school), but the mind is the greatest tool we have at our disposal. We can start to develop that in our children.

    There is also safety in numbers. Make sure your kids stay in a group if they're out - it's more difficult to be a target if there's plenty of friends and witnesses around.
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa

  8. #8
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    teach them well, control what you can, try to not worry about the rest. Worrying will not change anything and will just drive ya nuts.

  9. #9
    Member Array spacemanspiff's Avatar
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    a bulletin has been making the rounds of the hippy-liberal-palooza blogs on myspace.com, that tells of a girl who is raped and eventually kills herself because the rapist (who was a friend) gave her HIV. the last sentence of the bulletin says basically 'if youre a girl, repost this and tell everyone about how messed up it is; if youre a guy, please beat the crap out of the rapist'.

    so i reposted it with a link to one of the pages on a-human-right, and not a few hours later i got a message back saying 'is the use of weapons really a good idea? isnt there enough violence in the world?'

    the mindset out there is either 'it'll never happen to me', or 'it will inevitably happen to me and theres nothing i can do about it'.

    had a woman come into the gunshop a few weeks ago with the former mindset. she jogs on one of the trails that goes through town and just happens to have had several attacks made. shes a short, lean woman with the wrong idea of how she can protect herself. so we set up a mock environment. i stood 25 feet away and charged her. while she was shocked how fast that distance can be compromised, she still thinks that she can 'scream for help'. before she left, we asked her for advice on how to read the 8-ball, because obviously she can foresee into the future and avoid danger, in her mind anyways.

    every person should have a defensive weapon of some sort at their immediate disposal.

  10. #10
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    Awareness, a defensive mindset and a sharp pencil is about all you can do. That sounds simple but with kids, the awareness part is problematic in most cases. Just do the best you can to get it across to them that it is a dangerous world out there. I think if I had it to do all over again I would probably enroll them in martial arts....
    Bumper
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  11. #11
    Senior Member Array BlueLion's Avatar
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    My wife is also expecting our first child in June and I know things will change. i will go out and buy a gun safe, but I will still carry the SW 637 in my Fobus around the house though. Oh, congrats....
    Listen, Think and React.....Nuff Said.....

  12. #12
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    Thumbs up This Is A Really Great Thread.

    I don't have any kids but, I can sure appreciate the thought and concern that you folks are putting into your posted comments.
    I wish all parents shared your total dedication to their children.
    I am always watching out for the little kids in my neighborhood.
    It's my opinion that some of them are way too young to be walking to and from school alone.
    Especially before they get up to the area where there is a School Crossing Guard at every corner.

    Home Schooling is a GREAT thing if it's possible for parents to do it.

    And Euclidean:
    I know you really would catch a bullet for your kids.
    I just "know" some things about people.
    (QKShooter Have Strong Gut Feelings)

    "Well if they're in my classroom, I'll lock the door, pile them up in the corner, and I do have a stout wooden stool I can swing and I'll take the first bullet... no guarantees after that."

  13. #13
    Member Array mchasal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Euclidean
    Well if they're in my classroom, I'll lock the door, pile them up in the corner, and I do have a stout wooden stool I can swing and I'll take the first bullet... no guarantees after that.
    ...
    First off Euc, I applaud you for taking the time to think about what you would do in this situation. I hope my son is lucky enough to have a teacher with your mindset if he is ever unfortunate enough to be put in a bad situation.

    I wanted to suggest that you consider what you could do to avoid taking that first bullet. Wearing a vest is an obvious choice, bodyguards wear them not only to protect themselves but to prevent the client from being hit by a shoot through if the bodyguard takes that bullet. I imagine wearing a vest every day might be overkill since you're not really in a dangerous situation. How about getting a kevlar panel to put in your briefcase or bag? That way you can charge the dirtbag, hopefully not get hit, and maybe disarm him. I found one here: http://www.tftt.com/store/ but I'm sure they're around elsewhere. They don't weigh much, and once you stick it in your bag, you can pretty much forget about it. Well, don't forget about it if you need it ;)

    Mike
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  14. #14
    Member Array joe/OH's Avatar
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    Our little girl turns 11 months in two days. We have another one on the way soon. There is a loaded weapon accessible within seconds from any part in the house. (They are all well hidden but this practice still may need to change when the kids get older.) The wife has CCW. While she usually doesn't carry around the house we practice several drills.

    We have talked of home schooling - but it's still a few years away and we haven't made a decision yet. It has less to do with protection and more to do with the liberal brain-washing that kids go through in school. (My wife is/was a teacher and has more horror stories than I care to remember.)

    I guess when it comes down to it - letting go and worrying is just part of being a parent. You try to protect them as much as possible, but must let them protect themselves at some point. Over-sheltering is not an option - I've seen the results of that with some kids in the neighborhood.

  15. #15
    VIP Member Array Rob72's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spacemanspiff
    ahad a woman come into the gunshop a few weeks ago with the former mindset. she jogs on one of the trails that goes through town and just happens to have had several attacks made. shes a short, lean woman with the wrong idea of how she can protect herself. so we set up a mock environment. i stood 25 feet away and charged her. while she was shocked how fast that distance can be compromised, she still thinks that she can 'scream for help'. before she left, we asked her for advice on how to read the 8-ball, because obviously she can foresee into the future and avoid danger, in her mind anyways.

    every person should have a defensive weapon of some sort at their immediate disposal.
    Anyone of lesser size than the average male (about 5'10, and 170-200#, IIRC) is seriously delusional in the prospects of warding off a determined attack, unarmed, unless they have some serious street fighting experience.

    Mindset, mindset, mindset. YOU are responsible for your safety (older children); younger children should be able to watch, learn, and ask why certain things are done.

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