New doctor, "no weapons" and PO'd wife

This is a discussion on New doctor, "no weapons" and PO'd wife within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Well, it finally happened and boy, is my wife pissed. I have been reading for months on this and various other Firearms/2nd Amendment web sites ...

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Thread: New doctor, "no weapons" and PO'd wife

  1. #1
    Member Array tflhndn's Avatar
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    New doctor, "no weapons" and PO'd wife

    Well, it finally happened and boy, is my wife pissed.

    I have been reading for months on this and various other Firearms/2nd Amendment web sites about refusing to do business with companies that wish to disarm law abiding citizens who have jumped through the hoops of getting a concealed carry permit.

    Today, I was to meet with a new doctor for my first appointment with him and lo and behold what was on the entrance to his building but a sign saying “No weapons, concealed or otherwise.

    So I left, called the office and told them I was cancelling my appointment and why.
    “I do not do business with those who feel the need to disarm law-abiding citizens who have gone through the legal steps to obtain concealed carry permits.”

    Now I am trying to explain to my wife, who thinks I am being ridiculous as the Doctor doesn’t own the building he’s in.

    She went to her first appointment with the doc yesterday and really liked him and thinks refusing to see a doctor because of a "No Weapons" sign is just more proof that I have become a "gun nut."

    I tried to explain that I didn’t feel like beginning a patient/doctor relationship with someone that I didn’t want to go visit because I would either have to leave my EDC at home, or leave it locked in the car in a not so great area.
    That didn’t work so well either.

    Anybody with any ideas on how to quell the ire of a wrathful wife?

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  3. #2
    Member Array G96X0's Avatar
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    I'm with you, I would find another Doc.

    Good luck, I feel the majority of medical people are anti-gun, anti-motorcycle, etc...

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    Array Thumper's Avatar
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    Well... having been married for going on 37 years, I've learned a very important lesson; no matter what the topic or issue, if my wife does not agree it's because I'm wrong! I'm ALWAYS wrong... but that's okay. I'm tuff and have broad shoulders, I can take it!

    I dunno, if I were to ask your wife I'd bet she'd say you were wrong too!

    Suck it up bro and accept the inevitable!
    ALWAYS carry! - NEVER tell!

    "A superior Operator is best defined as someone who uses his superior
    judgement to keep himself out of situations that would require a display of his
    superior skills."

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    Senior Member Array BeefyBeefo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by G96X0 View Post
    I'm with you, I would find another Doc.

    Good luck, I feel the majority of medical people are anti-gun, anti-motorcycle, etc...
    No kidding.

    I can't tell you how many doctors have tried to lecture me about how bad motorcycles are, blah blah blah....

    -Jeff-

  6. #5
    Distinguished Member Array Rcher's Avatar
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    Anybody with any ideas on how to quell the ire of a wrathful wife?
    Well flowers never worked for me, my wife is a florist. Maybe lavish her with diamonds and gold? If she's anything like my wife, you'll be going to that Dr. Good luck.

    >>---->
    "Government is not the solution to our problem; government IS the problem". - Ronald Reagan 1981

  7. #6
    jfl
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    Distinguished Member Array jfl's Avatar
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    I don't compromise certain principles ... and I have been happily married for 36 years.
    My wife might not agree with some of my choices, but she respect them ... and I do the same !
    The first rule of a gunfight: "Don't be there !"
    The second rule: "Bring enough gun"

    jfl
    (NRA Life Member/Instructor - GOA - IDPA - GSSF - ex-IHMSA)

  8. #7
    VIP Member Array ccw9mm's Avatar
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    She possibly won't follow the concept, seeing as how she's apparently made up her mind already ... not unlike the doc, but ...

    Criminals don't obey laws. They scoff at and disregard signs.

    Signs and laws targeting upstanding citizens seek to disarm ONLY upstanding citizens. Criminals will continue to ignore such "requests."

    The folks at the doctor's office that are promoting this signage don't appreciate the simple fact that they're driving away some of the most upstanding clientele.

    It's like putting up a sign indicating drivers of Toyota Camry cars are to be refused entry and service, if caught, and that refusal to leave will be punishable as criminal trespass and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

    You're refusing to be treated like a second-class citizen simply because you take seriously the security preparations you've made for the health and well-being of your family. (A doctor, after all, should appreciate the worth of that.)

    Desire to find another doctor isn't due to being a "nut." It's due to refusing to be treated as a second-class citizen for lack of reasoning.

    Quote Originally Posted by tflhndn View Post
    Well, it finally happened and boy, is my wife pissed.
    That doesn't make her correct about this. She's opting to feel instead of think. She has a brain; she should use it to help understand the point of view. She need not agree with it, but as a reasonably intelligent adult she must come to grips with the fact she's refusing to think.
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
    Explain: How does disarming victims reduce the number of victims?
    Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos).
    NRA, GOA, OFF, ACLDN.

  9. #8
    Senior Member Array jofrdo's Avatar
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    There's no good reason why you and your wife have to share the same doctor; go find one of your own who doesn't limit weapons. She's right, you ARE a gun nut. So am I. So what?

    I wouldn't present it to her as bluntly as I just did to you. Tell her that carrying a gun is a lifestyle choice that is important to you, and you want to live your life in a manner that supports that choice whenever possible. You intend to associate with those who will support that choice. Your firm confidence should win her over. If it doesn't, you don't have anything in your arsenal that will protect you.

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    VIP Member Array sass20485's Avatar
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    There are two methods for arguing with women..and never one work. Just accept that you are wrong ( if you have been married more than a few years, you should already know that ) and do what you must to make your life more comfortable. Leaving your gun in your car for an hour is a LOT easier than being nagged for days on end and then some.

  11. #10
    VIP Member Array grady's Avatar
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    You're not going to quell her anger. She's upset because she doesn't--correction--chooses not to understand the danger. I don't know if she's trying to control you through her anger, but she might be.

    Good for you for canceling the appointment. If your wife likes that doctor, then just find another doctor for yourself. Ain't no big deal if you two have different doctors. It very well may make record-keeping easier.

    Here's a reason for not going to a doctor's office that is posted: http://www.defensivecarry.com/vbulle...workplace.html
    This shooting happened at the medical building my wife visited for an appointment this summer. The lady was gunned down by her ex boyfriend as SWAT waited outside the door. Dead. No second chances. If she had been armed, she might be alive today. Granted, this was a domestic situation where no other innocents were killed, but I don't have to look very far to find examples where unrelated innocents were killed by some gunman in a medical office or a hospital.

    The choice for you may not be how to quell her ire. If she chooses to remain that way, ain't nothing you can do about it. Your only choice, perhaps, is how to respond. Do you give in to her ranting, do you present her with facts and logic (which she'll probably ignore, as you've already tried that route with no success), or do you just state your case (or not) and go on about your life armed.

    I did the latter. Soon my wife figured out I'm going to be armed whether she liked it or not. If she wants to fight about it, I'll go at it any time, any place with her, and I'll let her know I plan to take care of her whether she likes it or not. And I damn sure don't need her permission. After a couple vociferous arguments on my part, she figured out I was intent on doing what I believe is right, regardless of whether she understands or not.

    If she wants to bring it up again, I'll again state how it is MY job, and MY decision, on how to protect my family. If she had a clue about the evil in this world, we could make joint decisions on security issues. She doesn't, so we don't. I'll not compromise my family's safety just for the sake of peace with an ill-educated spouse, or with anyone for that matter.

    Carry on. She'll either get over it, or not. Her choice. It's your choice as to whether you'll be armed when you visit the doctor. Your choice, not hers. She's made her choice, and I'll bet she expects you to respect that. Then out of fairness, she should respect your choice.

    I wish my wife understood the evils of this world, but she doesn't. That ignorance will not keep me from being prepared.

    To be prepared, or not. That is the question. I need no one's approval to make my decision.

    Good job on canceling the appointment and letting the doctor know the reason. Even if he doesn't own the building, he's a renter, and if enough renters report to the landlord that they are losing business, the landlord can remove the signs.

    If wife remains angry, that's her choice. Let her be angry, and move on with your life.

    I once was where you are now. Now that I've made it clear what I WILL do, we don't argue about it any more. Ironically, even though she fought me on it tooth-and-nail for a bit, she respects me much more now than she did before we had those arguments.

    My advice: make the best decision for your family's safety, and then stick with it, no matter if you get flack from inside the family or outside the family.

    There is no feeling in the world like knowing you've done everything you can do for your family's safety.

    I'll also wager there's no feeling in the world like being unprepared to protect your family because you didn't want to upset anyone... and then watch them get gunned down or raped because you weren't prepared.

    I'll stick with the former... til hell freezes over, and then some.

  12. #11
    Member Array gg12's Avatar
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    If the doc works for a hospital (practices in a hospital owned practice), the office may be mandated to post such signs.....the wife may be right.

    I could care less if my doc prohibits carrying in his/her office if he/she delivers good healthcare. You are free to judge your healthcare provider on whatever grounds you'd like, it's just that I prefer to use criteria like educational background, years in practice, reputation, and things like that as opposed to simply "likes guns or not".

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    VIP Member Array JAT40's Avatar
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    I would say, "Sweetie you're right I'm a 'gun nut' and it's a sickness, I need help. So help me find a Doc. that understands my special gun addiction, a gun friendly Doctors office where I can go and feel safe and get well."
    Yea, that will work.
    While people are saying "Peace and safety," destruction will come on them suddenly, ... and they will not escape. 1Th 5:3

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    I like to be pragmatic about things and not dogmatic. I would have kept the appointment, and made a decision afterward based on whether I liked the doc well enough or not to keep going back in the future; and I would then factor the no-gun stuff into that decision.

    Good docs can be hard to find, so sometimes we have to make our little compromises in life.

    A for real example-- I recently had no choice but to seek medical care at a very famous clinic in a state which allows both concealed and open carry. The clinic is posted. I didn't (could not) forgo my essential care over this issue. The choice was simple, carry and give up cutting edge care or don't carry and get the best care possible anywhere.

    Life is all about compromises, so now compromise with your wife by begging forgiveness and assuring her you aren't one of us. Life will go easier for you. See what Thumper wrote.

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    VIP Member Array havegunjoe's Avatar
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    I have no idea how to "quell her ire" but I do have one question. Is the "no guns" sign the Dr's or the owner of the building? Does the Dr. as a tenant have the ability to tell the owner to remove it? Here in MN a landlord may not post, the individual tenants have to post their place of business.
    DEMOCRACY IS TWO WOLVES AND A LAMB VOTING ON WHAT TO HAVE FOR LUNCH. LIBERTY IS A WELL ARMED LAMB CONtestING THE VOTE.

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    Senior Member Array JohnKelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JAT40 View Post
    I would say, "Sweetie you're right I'm a 'gun nut' and it's a sickness, I need help. So help me find a Doc. that understands my special gun addiction, a gun friendly Doctors office where I can go and feel safe and get well."
    Yea, that will work.

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