How did you meet your wife with this lifestyle?

This is a discussion on How did you meet your wife with this lifestyle? within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; What I'm about to ask is a rather interesting question (I don't believe it's been talked about here before), but it's something that boggles my ...

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Thread: How did you meet your wife with this lifestyle?

  1. #1
    Member Array knifeone's Avatar
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    How did you meet your wife with this lifestyle?

    What I'm about to ask is a rather interesting question (I don't believe it's been talked about here before), but it's something that boggles my mind because I'm wondering how you guys did what you did.

    First off, as far as I'm concerned, everyone here is a sheepdog. That right there means we are going to have a more difficult time interacting with the majority of people--aka, sheep. Most of us hate crowds and dislike being around people in general to a certain extent. I'm not sure if that's because we're more introverted or that we know the evil that lurks out there all too well.

    In addition to that, most of us are tough looking, heck even most bad guys and beggars would probably turn the other way, we aren't so much the smiling or friendly type, most of us probably have facial hair of some degree, a lot of us with tattoo's, etc. AND, most everyone here carries.

    This leads me to the question I've been building up for:

    How did you guys have girlfriends, go on dates, and finally end up meeting your wife? I'm a young guy in his very early twenties and simply don't understand this.

    How does a guy who carries a gun, looks tough as nails, and hardly ever goes anywhere he doesn't need to be find a woman?

    The reason I ask is there aren't any women at work who are my type and magically happen to be single. Besides work, I mostly am at home. If I continue this, I'm probably never going to find any girl. What am I supposed to do? Even if I do go out, where am I going to go? Also, there are no available girls at my church that I'm interested in either. I also hate the bar/club scene (not too mention the fact that I'm a strong Christian) and would never want to meet a woman at such a place anyways.

    I honestly don't think I can force myself to put myself out there and join a club or something like that with the hopes of meeting a girl. Plus, who knows if there will be any single girls that you're interested in anyways and even if there are, it's pretty lame to be doing something you don't want to do.

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  3. #2
    VIP Member Array Paco's Avatar
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    I didn't carry when I met my Wife, but I smoked and rode a motorcycle and yes, I wore the leather jacket with Army pins on it. I also had/have facial hair and tats.

    For me I guess it was my charm that roped her in , 'cause it sure ain't my bank account.

    I have always been a fairly mistrusting guy, since I grew up in a rough neighborhood and learned at an early age to trust very few people.

    I just think the right insert desired gender will put you to where that part of your guard goes down for enough time to let them in.
    "Don't hit a man if you can possibly avoid it; but if you do hit him, put him to sleep." - Theodore Roosevelt

    -Paco
    http://www.shieldsd.net

  4. #3
    Ex Member Array GreenHorn's Avatar
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    Too Funny!

    "In addition to that, most of us are tough looking, heck even most bad guys or beggars would probably turn the other way, we aren't so much the smiling or friendly type, most of us probably have facial hair of some degree, a lot of us with tattoo's, etc."

    Too funny!
    I don't think any of the people I saw in the cc class I took even came close to fitting those descriptions, including me.

    It appears my greyman routine is working out pretty good.

    I just thumped her over the head and drug her off to my cabin!

  5. #4
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    I didn't actively shoot or carry when I met my wife. It was her idea to keep a gun in the house, and the cc thing evolved over time as shall issue became law and a range opened nearby.

  6. #5
    VIP Member Array First Sgt's Avatar
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    Hmmmm....5'8", 185, almost 61, retired military, extrovert, love people, never meet a stranger, talk with anyone who makes eye contact with me and might reasonably expect some type of acknowledement of existance (within reason on the eye contact), no facial hair, no tattoos, etc. I am far from a "tough as nails" appearance! Would probably surprise "most" folks in the fact that I carry and attempt to be somewhat proficient with a cocealed firearm. Doubt a BG, beggar, or anyone else would hightail it just because they looked at me. Sheepdog..probably. Just wanted to get all that in to "bust" your mental picture of the average person on here. NOW, as to your question on meeting the opposite sex, these suggestions are just the opinion of an ole man, but I kinda think the same approaches would apply. First of all, if your appearance is of the description of your mental image of "carriers", then you might first try adjusting your appearance. Trim your beard if you have facial hair, put on a pair of creased jeans or slacks, some nice gentle smellgood and head out. As you indicated above, if the BG's and the beggars are running from you, then prob the folks you're trying to meet are running from you as well. If as you say you are a church man, then visit some other churches and meet some of the folks your age that attend those other churches. Attend sporting events, football games, Nascar, local race tracks, outdoor fitness center walking tracks etc. Lots of folks walking around that love to talk to anyone. Go to the local parks, dog park, take your pet etc. Women are suckers for a guy with a dog. Take your truck or car to the local park, find a nice spot, and start waxing and cleaning. You'd be surprised at the folks that stop by and start conversations. Go have lunch or supper at the local hospital cafeteria. Sure are a lot of Nurses that go down to the cafeteria to eat. You never know who might make eye contact with you. Easy enough to walk over and introduce yourself. Just use a little creativity and "get out of the house". In the words of tactical instructors: "Get off the X" ...move move move...and you just might not only meet someone interesting, you might find they could develop an interest in shooting. Good Luck! Oh, BTW, I met my wife standing on the sidewalk, watching all the good lookin women get off work from the courthouse. Just happened to speak to her and VOILA 32 years later!!!!
    Sometimes in life you have to stand your ground. It's a hard lesson to learn and even most adults don't get it, but in the end only I can be responsible for my life. If faced with any type of adversity, only I can overcome it. Waiting for someone else to take responsibility is a long fruitless wait.

  7. #6
    Ex Member Array GreenHorn's Avatar
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    Keep your chin up friend!
    Your time will come, just believe in yourself.


    Peace.

  8. #7
    Member Array Glock30SF's Avatar
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    Met mine on the internet close to 10 years ago. Topic didn't come up till after we met in person. If I were single these days I would try some of those dating sites. Never know but I think you have a better chance then the old school way of being in the right place at the right time. Good luck.
    “The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.”.... Albert Einstein

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  9. #8
    Member Array tnroadrunner's Avatar
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    I met my wife 9 years ago on the internet in the widow and widowers chat room. I never owned a gun until I met my wife as I was originally from an anti gun state (NJ). Wife lived in TN and have always own guns. Now I'm so involved in shooting sports and defending our second amendment rights and also have a HCP, that my wife says she created a monster....LOL. We have now been married six years and going strong. For my birthdays and christmas my wife has bought me a shotgun, AR15 with Eotech and a S&W 442 as I wanted a snubbie for a BUG. My carry gun is an XD9 Service. Besides what was mentioned I have serveral other rifles, pistols and revolvers.
    Bob
    Its always a great day, if you don't believe me try missing one.
    NRA, TFA, IDPA, 3 Gun

  10. #9
    Senior Member Array scottc's Avatar
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    It was a little easier for me-My 2nd(and last) wife is my high school sweetheart. After HS I went into the Army as an MP. When I got out and returned home she knew my background and stance on the weapon issue. Then I went into LE and carried constantly. She is not the weapon type but understands my reasons and respects that. You to will find that someone.

  11. #10
    VIP Member Array jwhite75's Avatar
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    Sometimes you just have to wait...I am 30. My GF/fiancee is a friend of a friend and I saw her one day, not knowing who she was and was immediately in love. I didnt see her again for almost a year. Then we bumped in to each other struck up a conversation and exchanged numbers. We have dated now for almost 14 months and are planning on getting married in summer of 2010. We are both very attached to our Christian morals and beliefs and she now shoots with me and wants her CCP when she turns 21. When I found her I had quit looking. She was everything I thought did not exist, and I have never been happier. The funny thing is carrying and being more aware of your surroundings actually let you notice the good people and things they do much more easily, just as well as the potentially bad things and bad people. It was a difficult lesson for me to learn, but it is one of the truest I have had the pleasure of adding to my repertoire.
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  12. #11
    Member Array toaster's Avatar
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    It's not something you can make happen. It happens to you. Visit other churches. Keep your eyes open at the grocery store. Open up a lttle more to people. It will happen.
    Weapons list suppressed...........

  13. #12
    Senior Member Array firefighter4884's Avatar
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    I actually managed to meet my current girlfriend (been together 18 months, it's a serious commitment) through Facebook when I moved to Indiana.

    As part of the whole "getting to know you thing" we discussed firearms, as it is one of my passions, and I shared my enjoyment of firearms with her.

    I told her that I was in the process of getting a handgun carry permit, and we discussed it.

    It didn't phase her then, it doesn't phase her now, although none of our friends or family know that I carry.

    I even gave her a pistol for Christmas.

    --Jim
    Firefighter / EMT - Always Ready. Ever Willing.

    ~Never do anything that you don't want to have to explain to the paramedics...~

  14. #13
    Distinguished Member Array nutz4utwo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by knifeone View Post
    ...tough looking, heck even most bad guys and beggars would probably turn the other way, we aren't so much the smiling or friendly type, most of us probably have facial hair of some degree, a lot of us with tattoo's, etc. AND, most everyone here carries.
    The only part that applies to me is the carrying part...

    How did you guys have girlfriends, go on dates, and finally end up meeting your wife? I'm a young guy in his very early twenties and simply don't understand this.
    Good girls are hard to find. I agree. They are also worth waiting for. It is best not to worry about such matters. Concentrate on getting a being a good person, having a good job, good lifestyle, good friends, good community.

    Hiding away at home or work will not get you out in the world much. Do things you love. Go hiking, sports, read, whatever. Be a solid person, be honest, do things you love, and girls will appear...

    Life is beautiful, don't let all this concealed carry and awareness drive you crazy. It is not worth it.

  15. #14
    Member Array bigjake's Avatar
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    i guess my advice to you would be to pray about it, and the good lord will bring somebody into your life when His time is right, and it will happen without you doing any thing you wouldnt normally do. i dint carry, or own more than one gun when i met my wife, but my lifestyle was about the same. work, home church, and church mens groups(kinda hard to meet one there) my now wife was kinda the same way, we attended the same church and never knew of each other until her brother-in-law and my dad started playing cupid, and set up a "chance" meeting, her freinds always asked if she expected a guy to just show up on her doorstep, and july 4th 2004, well, i did just that. so id say keep praying, and dont be in a rush, God will get you and future mrs. knifeone together all in good time.

    p.s. facial hair(full beard), one tatoo, and i dress like a "redneck" daily, even to church, carharts, a tucked in t-shirt, and an untucked, unbuttoned flannel(cover),

  16. #15
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    When I met my wife there was no CC in Oklahoma, I was in the military and clean shaven, short hair.

    When the time is right it will happen. Until then try standing on the corner, holding a sign that reads: "Will date for ammo"!

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