My Transformation and hope for my wife.

This is a discussion on My Transformation and hope for my wife. within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; While this story may not be as exciting as many, this is my story of how I transformed from a sheep. Also I know I ...

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Thread: My Transformation and hope for my wife.

  1. #1
    New Member Array robertm1771's Avatar
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    My Transformation and hope for my wife.

    While this story may not be as exciting as many, this is my story of how I transformed from a sheep. Also I know I might not be the best writer but I hope this story give some hope to people that might have anti-gun spouses.

    A couple years ago my father in-law changed jobs and started to have to spend a good bit of time on the road and wanted to get his concealed weapons permit. I didn’t give it much thought at the time. I thought well maybe it made sense I didn’t see any point in carrying a gun everywhere I went.

    For some time my father in-law had been looking for a range partner, as we had a fatal shooting at a local range some time ago and he didn’t feel safe going by himself. Around October myself like many others started to think about there principles and how upcoming laws might affect that and my ability to protect myself and others.

    I had one major hurdle to overcome, my wife is very anti-gun. I had two guns in the house both locked up and out of her sight. My wife had told me she had a gun pulled on her when younger.

    So not long after the election I asked my wife if I could get a handgun. To my shock and surprise she didn’t say No! Wow I thought I might be able to really get a handgun and be able to get my concealed handgun permit. A few weeks later I went to the local gun shop with my wife. It was great there was an older female lady (Mother of the owner) working behind the counter. I think this helped my wife as well. As I didn’t know how long this change in her mood on guns would last I thought I will start small and we bought a Hi-point 9mm. Over all it has been a fine weapon no problems besides me knocking the sights off.

    During the next month I started to read books, articles, online, etc. The more I read about self defense, the more I learned that I am the person responsible for my protection. I keep reading and leaning about self-defense. At this point I knew that I needed to get my concealed handgun permit. The police cannot protect me and my loved ones only I can protect myself and if needed my loved ones.

    About a month has gone buy my wife has seemed to be less worried about my gun and seems to be adapting to my new found “shooting hobby”. The day after Christmas I find myself with a nice bit of money from my family. As we are heading out the day after for a family trip with the in-laws, I ask my wife if we can stop by the local gun store and have a look to see what they have. To my surprise she said yes. Once again the mother of the owner was in the shop. We looked at a few different guns and I feel in love with an XD40sc. To my surprise I was able to get my wife to touch the weapon. Well the XD40’s recoil spring is a little stiff for her, so the women behind the counter begins to show my wife other weapons she might be able to handle better. To my shock and surprise she looked held and worked the action on a number of weapons that day. At this time I asked my wife if I could sign up for the local shops CHP class.

    At the end January I had my CHP class, I had to wait till the next payday to pay for my permit. Middle of February about 13 days after I dropped off my application I was called to pick up my permit.

    Later that week I had to pick my wife up from a trip out of town for work. After I helped her with her bags and got back into the car I had to adjust my carry weapon. (I had not found a good concealed holster at that time) She looked at me and said “Are you carrying now”? I said sure am, I picked up my permit the other day. She looked at me again and said “Is that thing loaded”, looking a little worried. I said “Sure would be like having a car without gas”. She said “No that different it’s not the same”, so my response was “Well I will ask the robber to hold on while I load my gun”. She didn’t say anything for a second then laughed. I asked her why she was laughing. She just said, “Wait while I load my gun”. Sense then she has seemed very comfortable with my carrying.

    I carry every day. Now my hope is to get my wife to the range with me. She has promised to come to the range with me, I just hope its sooner than later. My Mother and Father go today to turn in there concealed handgun permit application. It’s my wish my wife might be doing the same down the road.

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  3. #2
    Ex Member Array GreenHorn's Avatar
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    Congrats on your permit.

    I see no mention of the Traditional Wally World Walk. (search)

    My wife wasn't that much interested in it until a friend of hers told her a story about a recent break in in our area where the perp was hiding in the house all day and waited for the husband to leave before coming out.

    She asks me to go the the range all the time now and she really likes the the looks of Kimber Pro 4" with CT grips. Her birthday is next month and she asked me to order her one. (she shoots my Kimber as well or better then I do right now)(although when it comes to the final shoot to see who buys dinner she cracks like an egg under the "pressure" every time!")

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    Congrats on the conversion...by the way, it took my wife three decades to go from 'no guns' to her own Glock-26 and CCW permit.
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    Congrats to you
    Sometimes I wonder who the old man in the mirror is....

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    Senior Member Array Ivan4x4's Avatar
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    Welcome and congrats , just remember to be safe and aware at all times, I never had to go tru any thing like that with my wife, she loves to shoot and buys her own guns, but she hasn't got her ccl just yet, but she'll get it eventually.
    EDC's Colt Defender 45 acp and S&W 442 .38
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    Array SIXTO's Avatar
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    Thats great, good job...but you do way to much asking the wife.
    "Just blame Sixto"

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    Welcome and congrats on your breaking from the flock. It sounds as if your wife is coming around. I would suggest you encourage her, but don't push her. Ask her to go shooting with you, but don't make a big deal of it if she says no. If you have access to a .22 pistol (either a friend/relative or rental) start her on it. The low noise and negligible recoil will make it easier for her to shoot accurately.
    If her and your Mom get get along well, perhaps the 4 of you could go shooting together. Another woman's input (especially someone she trusts) could help.

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    VIP Member Array jwhite75's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SIXTO View Post
    Thats great, good job...but you do way to much asking the wife.
    I was jokingly thinking the same way...but sometimes the subtle and slow approach works a little better. If he had just went and done it and shoved the idea on her..she may not have warmed to it so easily. Good job to the OP...and I have a feelign that wife will be a CCW holder soon enough. Just give her time.

    Mean while, study, train and train some more....having a gun, knowing how to use a gun, and being willing and able to use it are very different things to be prepared for. Work on them diligently.
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    New Member Array donmac17's Avatar
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    My wife was dead against firearms. Then came her moment of instant transformation when, in the late 1960's, a bunch of house-robbing thugs showed up in the neighborhood. It was 0200 hrs when the white van pulled up, stopped; four bums got out and began methodically checking homes for unlocked doors and windows. When they came to my house, I was awake and waiting on the other side of the front door with a sawed-off shotgun in my right hand, a Star .45 in the left, and my wife right behind me. The door knob was tried, found to be locked, but the guy on the other side didn't try force his way in and moved on. After that incident, my dear wife really didn't mind my having a gun at the ready.

  11. #10
    Member Array JimH58's Avatar
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    Its interesting to hear wife stories regarding CC. Most of the stories I hear are anti-gun and people dealing with that attitude. Living in Kentucky the attitude is probably not so much pro-gun as it is that many people including women just see it as a tool. My wife was born and raised in Kentucky and lived for several years in rural areas of western KY. As it is with many rural people just about everyone has at least one varmint rifle and knows how to use it. She was never anti-gun but we never had one around around until about ten years ago when she got from her dad a little .22 revolver that we used to shoot at a friends farm which was a lot of fun. Since that time the subject of handguns came up fairly frequently since I had owned a couple of handguns in the past. I had always wanted a permit to carry and the subject of CC came up about 5 years ago. I announced that I wanted to get a permit and she was somewhat receptive but not against it. I finally announced that I was taking the course to get my permit about three years ago and she was all for it and at the same time she said she would get hers as well. I think the key thing was that my wife has always been a security freak. Good locks on the doors, security system, checking locks on hotel doors, and so on. Its should not be surprising that she decided that CC was just fine. She realizes that the police cannot be everywhere and that it is up to you to keep yourself safe. When we decided to go to Virginia here in a couple of weeks one of the first thing she checked was whether our KY permits were accepted in Virginia.

    I think for those who are not sure about what their wives will think if CCW is wat they want to do they should stress the SD side of the argument along with handgun safety. I keep a loaded 9mm in the bedstand which my wife requested and there are handgun safes for the weapons that are not currently being used or carried. We no longer have any children at home. My daughter is 25 and lives on her own and my son 22 is away at college. He is an avid hunter and hunts deer during deer season and hunts with a bow during the bow season. Guns and bows are certainly familiar with him. For some women I am sure that safety is a serious concern especially if there are still children around. My advise would be to make sure that the safety issues are covered.
    JimH
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  12. #11
    VIP Member Array jwhite75's Avatar
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    I am extremely lucky. I carried for several dates with my GF before she knew. She was unable to tell until I told her and showed her. She realizes how unobtrusive it really is if done properly and is starting to get a feel for how the world really is, so she understands the necessity. It helped she was a WV farm girl and already owned her own hunting rifles and shotguns and wasn't scared of guns.
    Friends don't let friends be MALL NINJAS.


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    New Member Array robertm1771's Avatar
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    Its not how often you ask the wife its how you ask the wife :) We ask each other all the time we seldom tell each other no.

    I have a 22 Buck Mark its a great handgun and am sure it will be her first gun to shoot. I have given allot of thought to safety and I have covered it a few times with my wife I let her handle a my XD and have each time showed her how to check the gun is clear and to keep her finger off the trigger. I think in many ways she might be safer than I was at first I had a few bad habits to break. At this time we have no children but I have been giving it some thoughts on when we do and am still going over ideas in my head.

    Thanks for the support and welcome. Now am just waiting for my badge ;)

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    VIP Member Array AllAmerican's Avatar
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    Excellent story and congrats on your permit. I often think about how thankful I am that my wife was raised by a father who had guns and hunted.

    She has her permit. Be gentle and Im sure your wife will come around.

    Then watch out! LOL
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    Member Array belltoller's Avatar
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    I really admire the attitude of a lot of people here when dealing with the anti-gun views of loved ones.

    To share a quick story, I'm sure everyone heard about the recent school shooting in Germany. I was discussing it with my German girlfriend, and she is very anti-gun. I really try not to hold it against her because I know she was brought up in a very anti-gun country. So, we are discussing the incident, and I opined that if all teachers carried or had a gun ready, there would be a lot less of these shootings, and a lot less victims when the shootings did take place. She did not give any credence at all to my statement, just repeating her stance on how only a select group of people should own guns. It's really frusterating because a very deadly school shooting just occurred in her own country, and it's unfathomable to me, to understand how she could still be against teachers carrying. I really wish she could see how the killing could have been kept to a minimum if the teachers were allowed to bear arms.

    It's nice to read stories of people here converting their anti-gun wives. I hope to one day to the same, but it's a long journey.
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    New Member Array 400HP's Avatar
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    The first time I took my wife to the range, her grouping was, well...stunning. I will never forget that sh*t eating grin either.

    The joke now is I will hand her my firearm if need be.

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