This is a discussion on Haunts me within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; What happened to me a few weeks ago still haunts me today. I dont know why.
A few weeks ago I went out of town ...
August 15th, 2009 01:06 PM
What happened to me a few weeks ago still haunts me today. I dont know why.
A few weeks ago I went out of town with a friend who didn't know I carried. I don't know, he just never put two and two together. We ended up staying over night at a hotel and my friend suddenly noticed that I was carrying when I pulled off my shirt for a shower. His reaction was priceless and made me feel all warm and fuzzy. "Has that thing been on you ALL DAY?!" He had no idea.
Anyway, in the morning, as I was getting dressed I put my gun in its holster like any other morning and threw my shirt over top. His comment still bothers me. "I bet you feel 10 feet tall with that thing on your hip." He didn't mean any harm, but I felt the need to defend myself against it.
"No! I have been carrying ever since I turned 21! Its for my safety." Which is totally true. I don't carry and then act like I am invincible or strut around like I can kick anyone butt. I feel like I didn't have a good enough answer for that comment. It still haunts me today.
Has anyone else ever been confronted by this situation? If so, how did you handle it? or how would you handle it?
Thanks for all your input!
August 15th, 2009 01:06 PM
August 15th, 2009 01:17 PM
Don't let it bother you. It was most likely just a comment on how *he* would feel with a gun on his hip, rather than a comment about you.
Until someone straps on a weapon, they won't feel or know anything about the immense sense of responsibility that comes with it.
August 15th, 2009 02:08 PM
Apparently you weren't acting 10' tall ALL DAY or he would have commented on that too...I wouldn't worry about it.
"That I cannot do."
"Give this to, uh, Clemenza. I want reliable people, people who aren't going to be carried away. After all we're not murderers in spite of what this undertaker thinks."
Certified Glock Armorer
NRA Life Member
August 15th, 2009 02:21 PM
The ignorance of others doesn't "haunt" me, no. The worst penalties of ignorance are often felt by those who are. He's the sort that gets robbed/invaded and end up without a clue as to how he got selected or could have stopped it.
Originally Posted by Avenger
Generally, I try to educate the person, showing the misstep or error. But, often as not, folks will simply retain their preconceived notions and ignore what you have to say. Depends on how ingrained the prejudice is.
How do I feel? For me, it is like putting on shoes or grabbing the wallet. It's just another tool I take with me, to survive the day. But, it's also the power to take life, misdirected though criminals' lives might be. That, I don't strap on lightly. The responsibility that comes with doing so goes with me every day.
Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
How does disarming
the number of victims?
Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos)
NRA, GOA, OFF, ACLDN.
August 15th, 2009 02:23 PM
I forget I have a gun most of the time unless something makes me think about it
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .
August 15th, 2009 02:29 PM
There is a huge responsibility and an enormous liability that goes with carrying a firearm. This requires that I act in a certain fashion. That does NOT include acting "tough" or "brave" or feeling "invincible."
I am a quiet man who seeks nothing more than to be peaceful.
August 15th, 2009 02:34 PM
Handguns are a hot button for some people... as soon as it's mentioned or seen they're like Pavlov's Dogs. Without engaging their brains, they respond the way they have been conditioned to, good or bad.
It's not their fault and it's not personal from their perspective.
Opinions about handguns tend to be attached to a lot of emotion too, and that comes from a person's core or identity so anything you say or do in opposition they're beliefs will be received as a personal criticism of who they perceive themselves to be.
So just let it go Avenger, you probably couldn't have come up with any response that would have had the result you may have wanted.
People are just too complicated!
ALWAYS carry! - NEVER tell!
"A superior Operator is best defined as someone who uses his superior
judgement to keep himself out of situations that would require a display of his
August 15th, 2009 02:36 PM
figureatively speaking that is right??? I am comfortable with mine as well and im comfortable wearing it, but I always know its there
Originally Posted by dukalmighty
August 15th, 2009 02:37 PM
Originally Posted by JohnKelly
"You can say 'stop' or 'alto' or use any other word you think will work but I've found that a large bore muzzle pointed at someone's head is pretty much the universal language."
August 15th, 2009 03:56 PM
Let it go... I think that is the typical sheep reaction... just because you are armed, there's gonna be trouble...
"Texas can make it without the United States, but the United States can't make it without Texas!".... Sam Houston
NRA Life Member
August 15th, 2009 05:05 PM
Sounds like your friend has been reading too many Brady Campaign press releases. Contrary to how they like to paint permit holders, we don't get a big macho rush from carrying a weapon for protection. Don't let what he said worry you.
August 15th, 2009 05:51 PM
Hey my wifey thinks only cops should have guns. This morning she told me to choose between her and the gun....she told me she hopes Sottomayor bans all guns.
I still carry. My neighbourhood is too dangerous not to.
Aerospace Designer, Freemason, NRA member
August 15th, 2009 06:30 PM
IMHO, the most "haunting" thing is the clear case of transference.
The unconscious assignment to others of feelings and attitudes tends to underlie most anti-whatever laws.
If someone doesn't trust themselves with whatever (guns, alcohol, etc) they want to have the government protect them (and everyone else) from it -- through prohibition.
If someone says, "You must feel....", it means that's what they would feel.
It even shows up in questions, e.g., such as those "Do you because...?, with limited options where those are the only options they consider valid.
The haunt is not about you. It's what you learned about your friend.
I'm just one root in a grassroots organization. No one should assume that I speak for the VCDL.
I am neither an attorney-at-law nor I do play one on television or on the internet. No one should assumes my opinion is legal advice.
Veni, Vidi, Velcro
August 15th, 2009 06:42 PM
You should have just simply asked him, "have I been acting like I'm ten feet tall"? I don't know how long both of you have known each other, but it seems he might have been offended at not being let in on your secret sooner. I think what might be bothering you, is that you expected a different reaction from someone you consider a friend. He overreacted IMO.
"First gallant South Carolina nobly made the stand."
Edge of Darkness
August 15th, 2009 07:06 PM
I guess you'll miss her?
Originally Posted by wolfshead
If I'm repeating myself, or repeating myself differently, it's probably 'cause of the brain cells I've murdered and the selective memory caused by concussions, contusions and confusions. Oh yeah, and that one night in Dallas.
ATA- Life Member
--Guns? What guns?--
By DaveH in forum Law Enforcement, Military & Homeland Security Discussion
Last Post: June 19th, 2010, 02:41 PM