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Girlfriend Asked Me Why I Carry...10 o'clock News Tells Her Why

4K views 30 replies 29 participants last post by  RugerSP101 
#1 ·
My girlfriend and I were watching Lie to Me tonight. After the show, she said, "You know, I think you're a little paranoid. You think you're going to be attacked all the time!"

The old "you're safer than you think" argument from the antis - this anti being my girlfriend :wink:

Right about that moment, the 10 o'clock news comes on with a story about gang violence in Northern Virginia, where we live. How it is spreading into suburbia. And also how an older couple was attacked by gangbangers while they were walking one morning in Lansdowne. Lansdowne is supposedly very safe, by the way.

My girlfriend gasped at that story..."oh my!"

I responded: "That's why I carry." :yup: No need to argue...just watch the news! :rolleyes:

Even if the gangbangers ganged up on you like they did that elderly couple, I still look at it this way:

Assuming they're going to try to kill you, you might as well do something. Even if you don't win the fight. Why not send some bullets at them and die fighting? What's the worst that could happen - I win? It's better than "being at the wrong place at the wrong time." That's what the police said about that Lansdowne murder.

Maybe that elderly couple didn't stand a chance, but if they had pulled out a gun and started firing at those gangbangers, they just might have taken one of them down and made the world a better place.
 
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#3 ·
That's what I was thinking.... ask her if someone attacks them, if she wants you to only protect yourself and let her figure out her own defense ?

As the old saying goes.... if a bear attacks, I'm betting I can run faster than you do.
 
#7 ·
As the old saying goes.... if a bear attacks, I'm betting I can run faster than you do.
That reminds me of a funny Smirnoff Ice commercial a while back where the two dudes are standing there camping when a bear approaches, stands up on his hind legs and roars a ferociously loud roar... The one guy turns and hoses his buddy down with honey from one of those honey bear squeeze bottles, then turns and starts running away while his buddy is standing there dripping honey!

First time I saw that i was drinking a soda and damn near chocked to death. Funny stuff! :rofl:
 
#5 ·
I asked her what she'd do if someone tried to attack her, and she said "I guess I'd fight back."

"Would you try to kill the guy if you thought he was going to kill you?"

"Yeah..."

"With what?"

"I dunno..."

I can't blame her - society instills these notions in most peoples' heads. They have no plan!
 
#8 ·
Keep working on her. She isn't a lost cause. Tell her you carry to protect not only yourself but her as well because you love her. Tell her that her life might just mean more to you that it does to her because you are prepared to fight to protect her and already have a plan where as she does not.

Keep nudging her to go shooting with you. Then work on getting her to get her permit and carry. She sounds like she is a logical person and will see the light sooner or later.
 
#6 ·
yes va is become a bad place in many areas. were i grew up in hampton roads is all so become increased gang violence. with car jackings and i read a few months ago some gang members burned all this cars at this dealership. Just because people carry guns does not mean we think we will be attacked.
 
#15 ·
Exactly. I don't put my seat belt on expecting to get in a car accident every time I hit the road. I'm pretty sure my house isn't going to burst into flames, but I have fire extinguishers. If I had to bet, I'd put a up a good amount that I'll never fire my gun in anger, and that's great. But no harm will be done having it there and not needing it.
 
#11 ·
my wife changed her mind very quickly when i told her the same thing. my gun is my life insurance and my house insurance. basically told her the same thing mike said up there. i love her and her life means more to me then she might think. thats all it took.. she's been hooked ever since.
 
#12 ·
Hey Nova,
I remember that Lansdowne incident. It put some fear in me. I live in a subdivision just 5 miles from there, and even closer to the hispanic gangs of sterling. Each time I open my garage door during the dark hours, I wish I was carrying.
I really don't know how to carry at home yet, since my wife has issues with that. I may just take the extra time to open my car door and put the car gun in my pocket before opening the garage door at night and mornings.
 
#13 ·
Through the me harping, the news reporting, and a bad experience in a high rise parking lot...my wife became a believer, but it took many years...she's there NOW.:yup:

To the OP...
Keep giving her those news reports.:yup:
 
#14 ·
My own theory is that a lot of people cannot allow themselves to think about danger in the world, because since they have never been in a life threatening situation, lethal danger is theoretical, almost mythical. Something which happens to "other people", in the "wrong neighborhood", or to people who "bring it on themselves".

To think about danger seriously, is to make it real, and realize how truly unequipped they are.
 
#16 ·
keep feeding/showing her news stories
and get her here....search for VA Armed Citizen stories
NRA-ILA ::
 
#17 ·
Nothing like the power of positive reinforcement, I say.....
 
#18 ·
I'm glad that timing came through for you on that conversation! Eventually it will work out, and if it only results in her accepting that you have a good reason to think how you do, thats better than having to hide your beliefs and actions from her.

After reading through the news story, I am admittedly a little surprised by where the suspects are from...having been going to these places for over a decade, it really raised an eyebrow. I know Annandale has issues, but its still an upper middle-class suburb. Stirling is one of the "uppity" shopping meccas of the far western suburbs (again I know there are developing issues there). But Middleburg?! Its a rural horse-breeding town that is primarily surrounded with multi-million dollar equestrian estates and their slightly snooty occupants (no offense to anyone who might be from there, its a great area). I'd expect the worst criminals from that area would be guilty of SEC violations, or maybe cheating on the pedigree papers for their horses, not being an accomplice to Capitol Murder.

I always assume that anything could happen anywhere, and that it could be done by anyone of any kind...but apparently that is far more true that I previously thought.

Thanks for helping remind me of how bad NoVa is getting, and good luck on educating your GF!
 
#19 ·
I'm going through the same kind of deal with my girlfriend. She was never against me getting a gun and eventually my CHL when I'm able to, but she is against carrying one herself. She carries pepper spray and may carry a stun gun if/when I get her one, but she's against carrying a gun. She won't really say why.

Anyways, there's few things I've picked up.

1) Watch the local news together. You've already started doing this, which is good, but keep it up. She'll see it's not an isolated incident. Also, read the newspaper. You can't make her read it, but you can read it, find stories that support your argument, and give her the brief version of what happened.

2) Take her to the gun range, and teach her about firearms and firearm safety. People are naturally scared of what they do not know. Especially when they get the majority of their firearm knowledge from movies and media outlets. The more comfortable she becomes with them, the better off you both will be.

This has been working pretty well for me so far, but still need a little bit more to get her to carry.
 
#20 ·
Bad logic to compare it to health insurance. If someone says this to me and they are not in good physical health I am going to ask why they are not as concerned with the more likely killer of diabetes or cancer? Or if they smoke? Or drink?

Not to mention using that logic they would have fire extuinguishers with them at all times.
 
#21 ·
"You know, I think you're a little paranoid. You think you're going to be attacked all the time!"

Well, I was going to chime in with the 'You're paranoid putting on your seatbelt every time you get in the car. You think you're going to be in an accident all the time' and 'You're paranoid having a fire extinguisher in your kitchen. You think you're going to have a fire all the time'...

But torgo1968 essentially beat me to it!
 
#22 ·
"You know, I think you're a little paranoid. You think you're going to be attacked all the time!"

Well, I was going to chime in with the 'You're paranoid putting on your seatbelt every time you get in the car. You think you're going to be in an accident all the time' and 'You're paranoid having a fire extinguisher in your kitchen. You think you're going to have a fire all the time'...

But torgo1968 essentially beat me to it!
 
#23 ·
I told my wife "you know, I wish I didn't have to carry. It's a pain in the butt. But I couldn't live with myself if someone were ever to try and hurt you and I could have done something to save you, but was too lazy to carry that day."

Kinda put an end to her comments! :wink:
 
#24 ·
Over 20 years ago, I told my girlfriend now my wife this.

Why do you wear a seatbelt?

She’s very intelligent and within a minute or two she responded “I got it”, and added she had never thought about it that way; But that I was right.

Today she is paranoid for us to leave the house and I not be armed. Sometimes, she will look me over and ask which pistol are you carrying? Because she could not tell, and wanted to make sure I was.
 
#28 ·
Something I read on a motorcycle forum.

A guy gearing up at work -- pants, jacket, boots, gloves, helmet. A coworker loudly asked if he planned to get in a wreck. The guy responded "No, I don't plan. But if I do wreck, I plan to get up."

Same thing. I don't plan to be attacked. But if I am attacked, I plan to survive, and to ensure my loved ones survive. Who knows? Maybe I'll end up saving people I don't even know.

But I ain't planning on it. I'm just trying to stay safe in this increasingly nutty world.
 
#30 ·
"You know, I think you're a little paranoid. You think you're going to be attacked all the time!"

Not really, not all the time, just at anytime, anywhere.
 
#31 ·
"You know, I think you're a little paranoid. You think you're going to be attacked all the time!"
My mom pulled this one a few weeks back.
Paranoid means you think someone is actively out to get you personally.
Thats not even remotely the case here.

I have a jar with 1000 white marbles in it. I toss in a blue one and a red one and shake the jar around. The blue and the red marbles didnt touch this time....and they may never, ever come into contact when I shake the jar each time.
But there is always a random chance that the red and blue marbles may end up falling into each other and touching at some point. Maybe they will, maybe they wont...who knows.
But in that off chance they do then Mr Blue Marble had better be prepared for whatever Mr Red Marble has in mind.

Its not paranoia at all. Its just understanding the odds.
 
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