Boil the frog
After three years of cc'ing and catching heck from my anti-gun wife for it, I believe progress was made this morning; I typically go out of my way to ensure that she doesn't see me holster-up, or ever see a firearm. However, this morning she was talking to me as I was getting ready for work and the only thing I had left to do was to put on my primary + bug, so I did so while we were talking...
She stared at me like I had three heads, made some sarcastic remarks and then gave me a peck on the cheek as I left.
Maybe it is the baby steps that are part of the problem?
You carry, she doesn't like it, but that hasn't changed anything.
Maybe not hiding it, but not flaunting it either will lead her to change her thinking sooner?
It must be uncomfortable living with an Anti, and I give all of you who do, much credit.
Wait, WTH is "boil the frog"? Never heard that saying, must be a colloquialism.
OK, now I get it, just never heard it said like that. Slowly raise the temp!
Dump a frog into a pot of boiling water, it will jump right out.
Dump a frog in a pot of cold/warm water and turn the stove to boil, it will stay in the pot and die from boiling.
Ergo - forcing the SO to watch/endure/see the gun that she has an aversion to will cause a meeting with a divorce attorney.
Slowly get her used to the idea, you see the 50th wedding anniversary.
In WHEC724's case, he turned the stove to "Keep Warm"three years ago, and today dropped a red hot rock into the pot with the frog.
I stopped hiding the "gearing up" process from my wife as it really didn't help, she's really starting to come around some, she discusses CCing much more openly than she used to.
I stay out of the way when the wife's getting beautiful and prefer she do the same when I gear up. I am getting a little less shy about uncovering when in the house though. The little lady is getting used to the idea of a gun on me all the time.:hand10:
Within a year my wife went from almost kicking me out of the house unless my first gun went, to wanting her own gun and getting a CCW! Just keep pointing out all the crime news to her.
I don't have this problem. Mine asks if I am properly outfitted before I go anywhere, even if it just to the gas station for a fill up or some milk.
I'm in the same boat. I'll usually wait for her to leave the room before I gear up. I'm not hiding it, but I'm not making a waving it in her face either. She goes through life happy as a clam and never knows I'm even armed. Early on, she gave me a hug an could feel the gun. She got all chicken-lipped and didn't talk to me for the rest of the day. Now it's 8 yrs later. Just the other day that happened again, she just rolled her eyes and went on about the day normally.
Tell your SO that you met the most intriguing woman at the gun range to day.
If see has even the least bit jealous bone on her body,you get a new range partner.:rofl:
Good luck on heating her up.
You make progress any way you can.
It is nice to see people slowly become accustomed to such a thing. Even for people who aren't totally against it, seeing someone carrying a gun can be a big shock. It is, after all, not part of our society for those not in uniform.
I remember the first time my mother saw me carrying a gun... it was all she could stare at.
A couple of months later she could actually look at ME instead of the gun on my hip. What became a problem was when she started bragging about the fact I carry.. to stranger.. in restaurants.. and telling them what a "crack shot" I was. We had to have a little discussion about appropriate times to talk about those kinds of things.
Either way it was a process. She's knows you carry and is seeing that your gun isn't jumping out of its holster and mowing people down. She may never be ready to carry herself but she will better understand the mind of those who do and maybe when it's time for her to cast her vote she will remember people like you and me.
Keep boiling that frog (no matter how bad that sounds when used in reference to your wife).
WOW, “boil the frog” was something new for me too; I never had heard it before. Thanks Sticks for the explanation. :smile:
My new phrase for the day! Thanks for sharing, you learn something new everyday.
LOL. Yeah - but as limatunes mentioned, you probably never want to refer to your SO as 'the frog'. I certainly meant no disrespect to mine in doing so! :embarassed: Doh...
Originally Posted by CowboyColby
724...sorry to hear about that. Hopefully she will get past that and realize you are there for her and thats why you "gear up". My situation is a bit different; we "gear-up" together, practice together and enjoy hanging out with other's who do the same. I have noticed that my wife has more confidence and feels better knowing that she has the ability to protect herself should the need arise. Lets face it; women are easily targeted by slime balls who want something for nothing and its a good thing when your wife can be less afraid of those types of encounters.