Putting down my carry weapon for a while. Depression related

Putting down my carry weapon for a while. Depression related

This is a discussion on Putting down my carry weapon for a while. Depression related within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Life has been pretty horrible lately. In the past 2 months my fiance has had a miscarriage, i wrecked my car, I got sick and ...

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Thread: Putting down my carry weapon for a while. Depression related

  1. #1
    Member Array fox2102's Avatar
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    Putting down my carry weapon for a while. Depression related

    Life has been pretty horrible lately. In the past 2 months my fiance has had a miscarriage, i wrecked my car, I got sick and had to miss work and since it's a dead end job with no benifits with little pay i was way short on my car payment. My parents helped me with that but i get a call from capital one and they tell me i never got my last months payment, my boss is on my ass because i'm "lazy" as he says. He doesn't take into account that I'm desperately trying to find a job, I have a fiance to think about now, and I have little time out side of school and work to do any of my personal buisness so I have to do it in between projects at work.

    I have a 2 year degree in multimedia and it's basically a $42000 piece of paper and the degree i'm in now is equally useless. I want to transfer but I can't because since I work at the school as a work/study if i quit classes i'll lose my job as well. There are no benifits at this job and no chance for advancement. I'm basically paying them $84,000 so i can work for less that $12000 a year.

    I dont want to switch degree's because i'm already so far in debt and I dont want to spend more money at a school that isn't even regionally accredited. And Im not the only one either. NO ONE from my graduating class or even anyone i know has gotten a job in field from my degree. I made a bad mistake in going to this school

    Then to top it off my mom was put in the hospital friday because of a really bad ulcer. She has a lot of health problems as it is so it just worried me. She is ok now though. Should be out in a couple days.

    I have depression. Been to a doctor about it before and they put me on meds and they helped some but i didnt like the way it made me feel. I would rather work through it and for a while I did. Well here with all this happening it's come back and suicide has crossed my mind more than once. Now i wouldn't do it but to be safe i left my weapons at my parents house 2 hours away from here. I'm not going to be carrying for a while...

    Sorry for the sob story and the long post. just needed to vent


  2. #2
    Distinguished Member Array Rugergirl's Avatar
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    You certainly have some reasons to be depressed.
    The good thing is that you have recognized the depression and made a smart decision.
    Don't worry about venting, if it helps, go for it, and we really don't mind if you do. I'm sure there are others, going through tough times as well, and I hope that your decision sets a good example for others who may be going through some tough times.
    For all who are, I hope you consider us here as friends who will listen.
    I'd much rather read a "venting post" than a bad story in the news.
    Disclaimer: The posts made by this member are only the members opinion, not a reflection on anyone else, nor the group, and should not be cause for anyone to get their undergarments wedged in an uncomfortable position.

  3. #3
    Member Array moggie6's Avatar
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    Hey it's ok. I agree with Rugergirl. I'd rather have this long post than a bad story. You pm me if you need someone to talk vent to. It takes a lot of courage to make that choice. Keep your head up we're right behind you.
    IAFF 2623
    Everyone comes home!

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array boricua's Avatar
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    I think that you are doing the wise thing. Prioritize your life, meaning that you are number one and the most important thing to you is you. Once you resolve your medical issues, then you can deal with everything else.

    A degree is nice, but does not guarantee a job. Don't be afraid of looking for something outside of your specialty or degree. Life puts obstacles in our lives to use them a stepping stones to success and happiness.

    Hang in there!
    Duty, Honor, Country...MEDIC!!!
    ¡Cuánto duele crecer, cuan hondo es el dolor de alzarse en puntillas y observar con temblores de angustia, esa cosa tremenda, que es la vida del hombre! - René Marqués

  5. #5
    Senior Member Array Avenger's Avatar
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    Thank you for sharing. Its okay to vent, thats what some people on this forum do ALL the time!

    You made the right decision by benching your firearms. Believe it or not, I am proud that you reconized your illness and did that on your own accord. I am sure others will agree with that.

    My advice to you is get some help. I know you said the Dr.'s put you on some meds that you didnt like. But maybe there is something out there that you will like and might just do the trick. Being depressed all the time really doesnt go away on its own.

    Be rest asured though, you have started doing the right thing, talking about it does help even though its painful. I am sure in time, things will get better. Hang in there!

  6. #6
    Member Array fox2102's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by boricua View Post
    I think that you are doing the wise thing. Prioritize your life, meaning that you are number one and the most important thing to you is you. Once you resolve your medical issues, then you can deal with everything else.

    A degree is nice, but does not guarantee a job. Don't be afraid of looking for something outside of your specialty or degree. Life puts obstacles in our lives to use them a stepping stones to success and happiness.

    Hang in there!
    I've been looking everywhere. I've got almost 2 years of IT experience fixing computers and can't even get geek squad to call me back and those guys are idiots. I can't even get a job at target. I partly blame my degree on that too because with a degree a lot of employers feel that i wont stay long or i'd expect to be paid more.

  7. #7
    VIP Member Array boricua's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fox2102 View Post
    I've been looking everywhere. I've got almost 2 years of IT experience fixing computers and can't even get geek squad to call me back and those guys are idiots. I can't even get a job at target. I partly blame my degree on that too because with a degree a lot of employers feel that i wont stay long or i'd expect to be paid more.
    Look at the it in a positive way. Working for Target and GS might limit your ability to expand your wings. Think about all the people that own computers. They are all opportunities for you to provide your services.

    Start small and create a reputation, and then the referrals will come your way. From there you either go to work for a large corporation or fly solo.
    Duty, Honor, Country...MEDIC!!!
    ¡Cuánto duele crecer, cuan hondo es el dolor de alzarse en puntillas y observar con temblores de angustia, esa cosa tremenda, que es la vida del hombre! - René Marqués

  8. #8
    Member Array gymteach65's Avatar
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    I think that you are wise to get your guns out of your house. You have a lot to live for and when life gets bad suicide is never a solution. Getting the guns out of the house is the easy way out and a good idea but you need to get more help then just getting rid of the weapons. If those thoughts are going to through your mind you need to get some counseling. Meds are not always the answer to problems also they deal with the symptoms and not really the core of the issue. That doesn't mean that you need to go to a shrink, (They are very costly and sometimes don't help a ton) You may want to consider going to a church and talk to a pastor or see if the church as some one who can help you out with out costing you a lot of money. I am year away form having my masters of Divinity and becoming a pastor and we a taught how to counsel people who are in your very situation. I think that would really help you. My prayers are with you, and your fiance.
    If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.
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  9. #9
    VIP Member Array BugDude's Avatar
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    The important thing is that you have recognized depression and you are aware of its affects. Please talk with your physician. Let your physician know what is going on with you and discuss how the meds made you feel. There are lots of meds out there to assist and you may need to try different ones to find what works for you. Talk with your family and friends. Also, prayer and reading the Bible always helps to put things into perspective. There are folks here who know what you are going through...feel free to let us know how we can help.
    Know Guns, Know Safety, Know Peace.
    No Guns, No Safety, No Peace.

  10. #10
    Distinguished Member Array Arko's Avatar
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    Seriously, good job on deciding to secure the weapons for awhile.
    There was a period last year where I quietly did the same thing just in case my judgment would be clouded by all the crap I had going on.

    I echo the sentiments above as well. Don't give upon professional help.
    And get some exercise. It's the last thing you're going to want to do, but you'll feel better after you do, every time.

    Good luck.
    "Don't Tread on Me"

  11. #11
    Member Array LethalStang's Avatar
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    I'll be thinking about ya man, hope you get things in your life straightened out. Unfortunely we all have our problems and sometimes they all come at once like in your case. Keep your head up, we're all here for you if you need to talk.
    Quote Originally Posted by rottkeeper View Post
    If you are living your life worried about being a victim all the time and not enjoying life to the fullest, you are already a victim...
    -You don't know what you don't see-

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    Member Array Bm7b5's Avatar
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    The fact that you can recognize you are depressed and take precautionary measures speaks well of you. I hope you have a down-to-earth, even-keel person you can talk with. Good luck and don't be afraid to take some risks, shake things up, and pursue what you really love doing. And finances are just finances. I personally know a multi-millionaire who is depressed and miserable, and someone living paycheck to paycheck who is an upbeat, happy person.
    A traffic ticket is formal recognition of a lapse in situational awareness.

  13. #13
    Member Array fox2102's Avatar
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    Yeah, What I really want to do is go to a community college near here and learn to fly helicopters. I dont want to be at my school anymore.

    I also want to get out from my car. I'm paying $417 a month for my car and that's nearly half my monthly income. I can't refinance because of high miles and i owe to much to sell it. Capital one wont work with me either so i'm kinda screwed on that part.

    I think i'm going to take my whole tax return and any extra money i get, save enough to pay my bills for 2 months, and then quit my job and school and pray i find something before i run out of money

  14. #14
    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    First a big for realizing that there is a problem. I think anybody here on the board would be willing to loan a ear. We all have gone thru problems. That is what friends are for. Please check out

    AFSP: Find Your Chapter

    Speak to a pastor,rabbi,or trusted friend. There is help out there.

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    There is a light at the end of every tunnel...hang in there. Vent as often as you have to, we are thinking about you. We all have down times...Murphy's Law says so...you can climb above it all...stay calm and use your long-term thinking head.
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

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