This is a truly epic thread consisting of excellent and sage advice from a large part of this forum community. Please preserve this thread for future consultation. My wife fully accepts that I CC (and quite likes it) but I still learned some good tips in this thread in regards to lines of logic used for this issue and the communication stratigies involved.
As far as the thread itself I have nothing to add because Grady said everything I would have and did so far more elegantly.
To add my own points and take perhaps a very unpopular and pollitically incorrect (I just dont care) stance on the issue, I will recommend as follows: I know that our modern culture frowns upon gender based roles but that doesnt mean they dont still exist. It is the DUTY of a husband and father to protect his family and ultmately his decision on how to go about it. The headship of the husband in the marriage relationship is going to have to prevail here. It is always bad when a wife seeks to undermine or usurp the responsibilities of the husband/father and equally as bad when the husband/father abrogates or abdicates his responsibilities. Whether you CC or not is not her decision to make. It would be much like if you invaded her area of responsibility for the children and started making decisions about what clothes to wear, when they will go to bed, what they are going to eat and so on.
I agree with many here and your own admission that there are other problems at the root of this issue but at some point when those are better resolved you are just going to have to step up and be a man and do what you have to do.