I wouldn't connect recoil too tightly with 'short barrel'. For two identical platforms you know the shorter-barreled gun will be a bit lighter out front. But, I doubt a 1" difference in barrel/slide length will make much difference in perceived recoil when you get up into the bigger loads.
Changing ammo might easily have more impact on perceived recoil that many gun choices. Some Fiocchi factory stuff and many personal defense loads can make range sessions short. OTOH, I've gone hundreds of rounds with maximum published handloads, and even above maximum published, and had no issues at all--same with Walmart ammo such as white box and Federal Champion.
I'm a big 1911 bigot and feel it is still among the top few handgun designs around. This in no way means 'a 1911 is a 1911', though--these days, saying '1911' is a bit like saying 'V8'...it doesn't say too much. But, as a lifetime lover and shooter of the 1911 (since 1967), I've found a 45ACP carry gun I prefer. If you're not absolutely decided, I'd look around a bit more for options that have good concealability, comparable if not better capacity, and provide a bit better recoil management. For a smaller carry gun, I think there are easier-to-shoot options in 45, although I don't see 3" barrel options all over the place.
I do understand you didn't ask for handgun recommendations--but you seemed concerned about shooting heavy-duty in a small 45. You may find added comfort with no substantial sacrifice in anything with other choices.