Alternatives for wife

Hiya there,

I carry everywhere except work - where I have EDC knife in pocket and sometimes pepper spray. My wife comes from a thick anti-gun family background, but she has come a long way. She hasn't shot yet and I'm not wanting to push her into anything either. She knows I carry just about anywhere, but still asks me occasionally if I have "it". Mainly while at a grocery store or other public places where someone acting irregular catches her eye. She'll instantly look at me and quietly ask. I see it coming since I'd be watching this person and in tune with the situation long before her, so I usually smile at her or nod discreetly. Later in the car or at home she has mentioned how she feels safe knowing I have it. She also admits she is still scared of guns in general, which I can understand, and we are gradually working on converting her fear of firearms into respect for firearms.

Few weeks ago, we had a "bump in the night"; I cleared as usual and damn near shot the cat (not really, but have considered it). The next night, we talked about it. She brought up how she occasionally feels a less safe when I am away on my hunting/camping/outdoorsy manly type weekend trips. She even expressed interest in additional training on a firearm of mine before my next trip.

Even if I get her to go out shooting and start building familiarity and competency, it'll be a long time before she has a Kahr or snubby in her purse. Again, I don't think it's wise to push her into it - especially since her interest is growing organically I would however like to find some intermediate solutions she can use to protect herself and our kids when I am not around. I got her some pepper spray, but am afraid since her SA isn't as good about something like this, and that the 1.5 year old will get his hands on it from her purse.

Any pseudo kid proof solutions out there I'm missing? Thought of getting a taser type product, but with each attempt to research, I get lost with what features, voltage, safeties, etc is right for us.

Any insight to alternative protective weapons for women who aren't ready for a firearm?

Thanks,
Live Smart!

With a taser you will have to figure out how the state view it. Is it a weapon? Can it legally be concealed? All that stuff. Pepper spray is good. They make impact weapons that can mount to keychains. You can use keys in a pinch too. My wife asked for a knife for Christmas. Her only reason was as a last ditch weapon, so I think she is capable of using it if she needs to.

And keep nudging her towards shooting more. I asked my wife to go to the range every time I went. It took 6 months or so, but she finally came along. She had no experience with guns. She now has her CHP, 2 handguns, and a shotgun.

Get her started with a CO2 pellet handgun or .22LR handgun like a Buckmark or Ruger

The only kid proof way is to have a safe of some sort, even if for pepper spray. How about taking her trap shooting? While not a carry weapon, it will help her get used to firearm safety, the noise and all but making it a bit of a game and a couples outing. I Agee with your approach of taking it slow.

Oh, and three weeks ago a childhood friend of hers died due to ND while showing someone his weapon. Let me tell you, she'd never been more interested in gun safety. For days, we talked about the details of how mine are stored, handled, etc. I stessed that if the operator followed 4 basic rules, no one can get hurt. Since our kids arent qualified as safe operators, I welcomed the safety inspection for how accessible, or not accessible, they are. We found a few improvements to how the night stand weapon could be better protected (layered safety).

Anywho. My point is that her parents - anti-gun who knew the guy that died well- were now questioning why we even need guns in the house and how dangerous "they" are. Due to the sensative situation, I choose not to try and convince them of my views, or even educate them (conversation for when families arent grieving). My wife however, after having deeply quized me on our situation and my rules, fully understands and takes the position of "it wasnt the guns fault, <name> unfortunatly didnt have sufficient, or properly apply, safety training."

Also, last year for my B-day, she planned and executed a secret getaway weekend that included a NRA event. While browsing the raffle pieces, she said several times how she liked the cowboy looking guns and the pink autos. So she has really come a long way... started with not being OK that i owned firearms and had in the house when we met.

When she is ready, i'll borrow a friends .22 and maybe a .38 six-banger... if she demonstrates competency, i'll pickup a revolver she can handle. Then i gotta work on getting her to take a CCW class so she at least has the choice to carry

I just noticed where you live ping.brady. Maybe sometime we should get together and take the ladies to the range! hehehe

I couldn't tell you your state laws regarding electronic stun weapons, but Oklahoma law says only that you can't use them against a police officer. Other than that it's actually completely silent on the matter. You might check into that and pepper spray. Fox Labs is what my wife and I carry for a non-lethal alternative.

Alternative for wife

Hand, inflatable.......woops I guess I should have read the story and not comment on the title first. :redface:

You're wise not to steamroll your wife into shooting. Good for you!

At some point you might point her towards www.corneredcat.com/, a very fine website for women who wish to protect their family. From that site,

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This site is about women and guns, not about cats. But in a way, it's about the cornered cat in all of us. It's about the determination to get away from an attacker if you need to. It's about making the decision to say, "Not me. Not mine. Not today." And it's about the tools to make that decision stick.

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BTW, you said you might pick up a 38 for her... the big refrain here is to let her pick one out. I realize your plan is not to get her a carry weapon but rather one for plinking, but the advice might stand for that as well.

If you're in the Lakewood area, you might look up www.ponderosafirearms.com. A good pal of mine is the gal who does their carving and leatherwork. I don't believe they stock firearms, but they can order you something or be the receiving FFL for a GunBroker deal or such.

Wishing you the best!

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Originally Posted by ping.brady

Oh, and three weeks ago a childhood friend of hers died due to ND while showing someone his weapon. Let me tell you, she'd never been more interested in gun safety. For days, we talked about the details of how mine are stored, handled, etc. I stessed that if the operator followed 4 basic rules, no one can get hurt. Since our kids arent qualified as safe operators, I welcomed the safety inspection for how accessible, or not accessible, they are. We found a few improvements to how the night stand weapon could be better protected (layered safety).

Anywho. My point is that her parents - anti-gun who knew the guy that died well- were now questioning why we even need guns in the house and how dangerous "they" are. Due to the sensative situation, I choose not to try and convince them of my views, or even educate them (conversation for when families arent grieving). My wife however, after having deeply quized me on our situation and my rules, fully understands and takes the position of "it wasnt the guns fault, <name> unfortunatly didnt have sufficient, or properly apply, safety training."

Also, last year for my B-day, she planned and executed a secret getaway weekend that included a NRA event. While browsing the raffle pieces, she said several times how she liked the cowboy looking guns and the pink autos. So she has really come a long way... started with not being OK that i owned firearms and had in the house when we met.

When she is ready, i'll borrow a friends .22 and maybe a .38 six-banger... if she demonstrates competency, i'll pickup a revolver she can handle. Then i gotta work on getting her to take a CCW class so she at least has the choice to carry

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JMO, but as a woman, I can tell you that most of us don't have the same physical strength as men and therefore, can't handle recoil like guys can. For this reason, I WOULD NOT start her with a revolver!!!! I'd start her with a .22 or 9mm semiautomatic. A well placed head shot with a .22 can be lethal...at the very least it would probably scare someone away. I'm a dead shot with my G30, .45 ACP, but can BARELY handle my .357 revolver. In fact, I've started loading it with .38+P rounds and even with those, I'm not nearly as accurate as with my .45. You don't want her to be afraid to shoot whatever she gets. Plus, if she has something she can actually become proficient with, she'll enjoy it more, be much more likely to practice and learn how to really handle herself!

Also, when enough time has passed and her parents start to give you a hard time again, talk to them about how safe guns are when you follow the rules, then remind them that home invasions are on the rise and ask them how they would feel if their daughter or grandchildren were injured, raped or even killed, etc., because you were gone and she was left unprepared and unprotected. Also, I've heard of gun safes that can be kept at the bedside and opened within a matter of seconds. I'm sure they'd be more comfortable if they knew the guns were in a safe.

Lastly, I don't know how old your children are, but my Dad taught my sisters and I to shoot at a very young age. Whenever one of us was 8 or 9, he'd take us to the river and teach us how to shoot. I think we only shot .22s, but at that age, they felt like "weapons of mass distruction"!!!!! Not only did it remove ALL curiosity, but we didn't go NEAR his guns because we had respect for them and how dangerous they could be. Just something to think about. Of course, you've got to get the wifey shooting first.

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Originally Posted by ErnieNWillis

Alternative for wife

Hand, inflatable.......woops I guess I should have read the story and not comment on the title first. :redface:

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We are sick individuals,You really gotta be careful when it comes to Titles.
Make sure that you start her out on a 22 when she feels ready,maybe even a rifle,and outdoor range so she doesn't get jumpy from indoor gunfire.within a short period of time the next time there is a "bump" in the night,you may hear "I got Point cover my ass sugar britches"

Some great advice
The 22 is my all time favorite gun.
Shoot a lot for little
More people should practice more even if it with a 22