Was I being irresponsible?

This is a discussion on Was I being irresponsible? within the General Firearm Discussion forums, part of the Related Topics category; I had a friend over my house and we were just relaxing and playing games like we normally do. I had removed my gun from ...

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Thread: Was I being irresponsible?

  1. #1
    Distinguished Member Array SubNine's Avatar
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    Was I being irresponsible?

    I had a friend over my house and we were just relaxing and playing games like we normally do. I had removed my gun from its holster which was on my belt, and placed my carry gun on the couch next to me (I was sitting in a recliner). I normally either keep my gun on me or near me at all times. He gets up to do something and sees the gun on my couch and sort of freaks out, and the conversation goes something like this,

    Him: "Dude don't you know gun safety?"
    Me: "What are you talking about?"

    He then proceeds (without asking me first) to pick up my gun, drops the magazine out and empties the chamber.

    Him "Don't you know gun safety, when you're not using your guns, they should be unloaded, are you expecting a home invasion?"
    Me: "Yeah my gun has been sitting there for the past three hours doing nothing, I haven't touched it, its either on me, near me, or in the safe, and I don't know if and when a home invasion will occur."
    Him: "I'd hate to see what happens when your nephews come over, you having guns laying around."
    Me: "They rarely come over and when they do my guns are locked up or on me, no exceptions or excuses, if you don't like it you can leave."

    I never said anything about him picking up my loaded gun without first asking me, I guess I should have because he doesn't have much experience with shooting them. Nothing more was said after that, and he went to go use the restroom soon after, and I reloaded my pistol and put it back in the holster which was under my shirt.

    Was I irresponsible for simply placing my gun on the couch next to me?
    USMC rule # 23 of gunfighting: Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

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  3. #2
    Member Array oldogy's Avatar
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    I would never place my gun beside me on a couch when someone else is in the house. IMO, the friend was acting irresponsibly by picking up your gun.
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  4. #3
    Senior Member Array BradyM77's Avatar
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    If you're friend had a ND while trying to unload it would you have felt irresponsible? There's your answer.
    "I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, you can't prove anything!" Bart Simpson

  5. #4
    Distinguished Member Array SubNine's Avatar
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    I'll never be placing my gun on the couch again when I have company over. The couch was not even two feet away from me, and I could easily get to the gun from where I was sitting.

    In a way I do feel I was irresponsible, but at the same time he had no business touching it. He had the gun and I didn't, that is probably why I didn't say anything. I also probably won't let him in my house anymore.
    USMC rule # 23 of gunfighting: Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

    I am the God fearing, gun toting, flag waving conservative you were warned about!

  6. #5
    Senior Member Array highoctane's Avatar
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    I wouldnt have laid it on the couch with him there. He shouldnt have picked it up witout asking. Thats like getting in someone elses car and changing the radio station. Some things you just dont do. I dont know i would end a friendship over it though.

  7. #6
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    My gun is either on the table next to me, or on my person. If someone stops in for a visit, the gun is on my person prior to me opening the door, and it stays there until visitors leave.
    Unless you live in my house, you never see a sidearm.

    It prevents problems as stated by the OP...you don't touch my sidearm unless you've received an invitation.
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  8. #7
    Distinguished Member Array SubNine's Avatar
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    I'm not going to end my friendship with this guy over this, I am glad he didn't let the gun discharge, and had enough common sense to keep his finger off the trigger. I more or less did it out of habit, because the first thing I do when I get home after plopping down into my recliner is take my gun out of the holster. We had just got back from going out for a bite to eat, which is why the holster was still on.
    USMC rule # 23 of gunfighting: Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

    I am the God fearing, gun toting, flag waving conservative you were warned about!

  9. #8
    New Member Array Aitsu83's Avatar
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    Concerning Safety

    I will start off with. "Safety means something different to each individual" there is a general list of gun safety rules that we can almost all agree on. but from there you get into comfort level. your friend sounds like his comfort level is about where mine is, and yours is about where a friend of mine is. I think it'd be a bit overkill to not have him over again. He shouldn't have touched your gun without asking. That alone would have sent me into an anxiety attack. I agree with your thoughts on the home invasion thing, but you also mentioned that he dropped the mag and popped a round out of the chamber. (If I misunderstood this I apologies) Personally I would not ever have a round in the chamber unless I was shooting at something. As long as you respect his safety concerns, and as long as you can talk to him (with humility) about picking up your gun I think everything should be Kosher. Example of my own personal level of gun safety. I don't have my CCW yet, so when I leave the house I put a trigger lock and a cable lock on my gun and it goes into my safe. I store my ammo in another part of the house with two different locks on the case. I store the magazines in another part of the house locked in a case that is locked in a cabinet. (and my parents still feel that it is unsafe for me to have a gun) ::chuckles:: I just hope that this situation hasn't put a strain on your friendship.

  10. #9
    Member Array chains1240's Avatar
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    No matter what you did your friend should have kept his dirty damn paws off your gun! Would you ever walk up to a really nice motorcycle in a parking lot and climb on to see how it feels? Never, never, never.
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  11. #10
    Distinguished Member Array MinistrMalic's Avatar
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    I think it is a lot wiser to keep it either on your hip or with the chamber empty, at least if there are others in the house.

    You learned a lesson, no harm done. Consider it a cheap reminder. :)
    "...whoever has no sword is to sell his coat and buy one." (Luke 22:36)
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  12. #11
    Senior Member Array Jmac00's Avatar
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    all my friends are gun owners, I don't think any of them would give it a second thought.

    On top of that, they know better than to touch my guns unless they ask first.
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  13. #12
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    A sanctimonious busybody type with poor manners. You friend needs to grow up, lose the self-righteous preachy attitude, and stop handling things without permission.

  14. #13
    VIP Member Array Rob72's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SubNine View Post
    I'm not going to end my friendship with this guy over this, I am glad he didn't let the gun discharge, and had enough common sense to keep his finger off the trigger. I more or less did it out of habit, because the first thing I do when I get home after plopping down into my recliner is take my gun out of the holster. We had just got back from going out for a bite to eat, which is why the holster was still on.
    Don't sweat it. Age and experience.

    Part of this is (IMO) mindset. Your pistol is there to enable you to "cease hostilities with alacrity", it is not a key-ring, pager, etc.. But you know this; it just needs to be at the front of your thoughts.

    You should not have removed it, your friend shouldn't have snatched it up. Apologize for the former, and say his doing the latter really made you uncomfortable, and I would think you'd be squared away.

  15. #14
    VIP Member Array David in FL's Avatar
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    As others, I'm not a big fan of putting the gun on the couch.....the end table would have made more sense just to keep it a little more out of the way. Aside from that though, your buddy should have left it alone, certainly should not have unloaded it. With respect to keeping it loaded in the house, having an unloaded gun is the irresponsible act IMHO!
    "Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a grey twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."

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  16. #15
    VIP Member Array Paco's Avatar
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    I don't think you were being irresponsible, but like others have said I would not take it off of my person.

    Also your friend had kind of a knucklehead approach to questioning you about it. He just up and picks up your weapon and clears it for you. I would have told him to put it down and don't do that again.
    "Don't hit a man if you can possibly avoid it; but if you do hit him, put him to sleep." - Theodore Roosevelt

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