Texas LEO HUmor

Texas LEO HUmor

This is a discussion on Texas LEO HUmor within the Law Enforcement, Military & Homeland Security Discussion forums, part of the Related Topics category; Texas LEO Humor-I borrowed this from another forum, it is really a tribute to one persons gift to find humor on the job. I hope ...

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 16

Thread: Texas LEO HUmor

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Array FortyFive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    868

    Texas LEO HUmor

    Texas LEO Humor-I borrowed this from another forum, it is really a tribute to one persons gift to find humor on the job. I hope he does not mind.
    Richard
    ===========

    If your hat, belt and boots cost more than your sidearm.

    If you know what a 'court gun' is.

    If you have a 'court gun'.

    If directions to a location involve livestock, property descriptions, or the words "When you get off the pavement."

    If the winner of the last three bar room brawls was last years Homecoming Queen.

    Dressing up for court involves pressed Wranglers and a Brushpopper shirt.

    If anyone on the Department is named 'Bubba'.

    If you don't know Bubba's real name.

    If Bubba is his real name.

    If you've ever gotten a confession from a critter by threatening him with either his Mama or God.

    If your interview for the job involved the question: "Can you take a whuppin'?"

    If you have more weapons and ammunition in your cruiser than most small nations have in their armies.

    If you've ever had an 'Officer Involved Shooting' where the victim was a feral hog or other four-pawed critter with an appetite.

    If the calibre of your sidearm is regarded as an artillery round in Europe.

    You've ever had to mediate a dispute concerning the paternity of a litter of puppies.

    If you have the impression that the Feds regard your department as being marginally more civilized than the Viking Hordes.

    If you think all back-up is 30 miles away and asleep in bed.

    If you've ever gone to an emergency wearing only your hat, pajamas, gun and boots.

    If spurs are a department-issued item.

    Sigh.
    Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.

    LawDog

    If the doors on your patrol car a welded shut.

    If you have Yosemite Sam mud flaps on your pick-up.

    If you have an eight track in your patrol car

    Roscoe
    As you slide down the banister of life,
    May the splinters never point the wrong way.
    ---
    NRA Life Member


  2. #2
    Senior Member Array firefighter4884's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Evansville, IN
    Posts
    686
    Nice one 45....

    on a similar note...I heard one of my other agency's ambulances on the radio the other day. (They were transporting a patient at the time...)

    "Headquarters, be advised, on Rt. 519, near Halsey Rd, there are several dozen cows standing in the middle of the road. Do you think you could get someone out here to take care of it..."
    Firefighter / EMT - Always Ready. Ever Willing.

    ~Never do anything that you don't want to have to explain to the paramedics...~

  3. #3
    Senior Member
    Array FortyFive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    868
    Pretty good Firefighter, sometimes the humor does show through and everyone gets a smile on!!! If I recall down your way there used to be a small airport years ago. I rode dirt bikes through the pines, interesting to see the stage coach trails and "pinehawkers" down that way!!!
    As you slide down the banister of life,
    May the splinters never point the wrong way.
    ---
    NRA Life Member

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Bud White's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Away - Health Problems
    Posts
    17,353
    pretty funny lawdog is always a laugh

  5. #5
    Senior Member Array CombatEffective's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    998
    Some of those apply to GA law enforcement as well. :)
    Shooters' Legacy

    Special sections for S&W and Ruger

  6. #6
    Senior Member Array firefighter4884's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Evansville, IN
    Posts
    686
    CombatEffective...

    When you say down my way...do you mean near Glassboro? or near Newton? You wouldn't be talking about Sussex Airport by chance would you?
    Firefighter / EMT - Always Ready. Ever Willing.

    ~Never do anything that you don't want to have to explain to the paramedics...~

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Array FortyFive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    868
    Firefighter-that was me on the airport question, I may be screwedup as to location of things.
    As you slide down the banister of life,
    May the splinters never point the wrong way.
    ---
    NRA Life Member

  8. #8
    Senior Member Array firefighter4884's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Evansville, IN
    Posts
    686
    ooooops...i blame it on the only get 3.5 hours of sleep last night
    Firefighter / EMT - Always Ready. Ever Willing.

    ~Never do anything that you don't want to have to explain to the paramedics...~

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array CombatEffective's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    998
    :) I was trying to figure out what I had said. :)
    Shooters' Legacy

    Special sections for S&W and Ruger

  10. #10
    Senior Member
    Array FortyFive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    868
    It is kinda funny when that happens where you receive a note intended for someone else. Just the fact you had to think about it means some grey matter has past under the bridge.
    As you slide down the banister of life,
    May the splinters never point the wrong way.
    ---
    NRA Life Member

  11. #11
    Member Array S.O. Interceptor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    143
    Huhm? Check, check, check................................. uh huh........... yep.

    Okay, it's official, all of the above have applied to me at one point or another.
    Rest In Peace Dad! I love you!!!

  12. #12
    Senior Member
    Array FortyFive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    868
    OK S.O., wipe all that BBQ sauce from them dress shoes and get back to work, lots of BG's out there.
    As you slide down the banister of life,
    May the splinters never point the wrong way.
    ---
    NRA Life Member

  13. #13
    Senior Member Array Al Lowe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Mason, MI, USA
    Posts
    574
    Quote Originally Posted by FortyFive
    Texas LEO Humor-I borrowed this from another forum, it is really a tribute to one persons gift to find humor on the job. I hope he does not mind.
    Richard
    ===========

    If your hat, belt and boots cost more than your sidearm.
    Ok, so if you have all the stuff listed in the first message that means what?

    Sorry for asking, but I'm just a poor old Yankee in Michigan. ;)

  14. #14
    Senior Member
    Array FortyFive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    868
    Hi Al, you will just have to excuse another yankee, what did I mess up here??? I was directing a pun to member S.O. being good natured about it. Ask me again I am really slow today.
    As you slide down the banister of life,
    May the splinters never point the wrong way.
    ---
    NRA Life Member

  15. #15
    Senior Member Array Al Lowe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Mason, MI, USA
    Posts
    574
    Quote Originally Posted by FortyFive
    Hi Al, you will just have to excuse another yankee, what did I mess up here??? I was directing a pun to member S.O. being good natured about it. Ask me again I am really slow today.
    Well, it's just that your first post started out like this:
    Texas LEO Humor-I borrowed this from another forum, it is really a tribute to one persons gift to find humor on the job. I hope he does not mind.
    Richard
    ===========

    If your hat, belt and boots cost more than your sidearm.

    If you know what a 'court gun' is.
    Now, usually jokes like this start out "You must be a xxx" and then it's "if your hat, belt and boots cost more than your sidearm."

    So, would the proper way for your joke to start be "You must be a Texas lawman..." ??

    Thanks,

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. Gun Humor...
    By Siafu in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: July 30th, 2009, 02:21 PM
  2. Jus' a little humor
    By Zsnake in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: December 17th, 2008, 09:23 AM
  3. Texas Members: Please Contact Texas Senator Kay Bailey Hutchinson
    By Rock and Glock in forum The Second Amendment & Gun Legislation Discussion
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: June 29th, 2007, 06:34 PM
  4. O.T. Humor!
    By Ti Carry in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: March 4th, 2006, 01:10 PM
  5. Might want to think about this (humor)...
    By Tangle in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: February 9th, 2006, 09:38 PM

Search tags for this page

leo humor

Click on a term to search for related topics.