Old joke revisited...

Old joke revisited...

This is a discussion on Old joke revisited... within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; PECANS IN THE CEMETERY On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, ...

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Thread: Old joke revisited...

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array Sheldon J's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Battle Creek, Mi.

    Talking Old joke revisited...


    On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucket full of pecans and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.

    'One for you, one for me One for you, one for me,' said one boy.

    Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

    Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.' He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off.

    Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along. 'Come here quick,' said the boy, 'you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls.'

    The man said, 'Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk.' When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.

    Standing by the fence they heard , 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'

    The old man whispered, 'Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord.'

    Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.

    At last they heard, 'One for you, one for me. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done.'

    They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the kid on the bike.

    You know after watching that old gal on "Americas got talent"with the walker bounce like a 5 year old when she was told she was going on to Hollywood, I have to think this could be a true story.......
    "The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century

  2. #2
    VIP Member Array Old Chief's Avatar
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    Jun 2006
    Southwest Tennessee
    You just need the right motivation
    When you accept mediocrity you sow the seeds for future failure.
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    Illegitimus Non Carborundum. In God we trust.

  3. #3
    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    Dec 2007
    Nassau, NY(Long Island)
    Do not have to be the fastest runner just have to be faster than the guy behind you.

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Hiram25's Avatar
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    Feb 2010
    Wyoming, DE
    I hope when the time comes that it's not an even split!
    You can educate ignorance, you can't fix stupid
    Retired DE Trooper, SA XD40 SC, S&W 2" Airweight
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  5. #5
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    Jun 2008
    Wonder if the old man stuck his cane in the kid's spokes.

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