Darn fine explanation

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Thread: Darn fine explanation

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array Sheldon J's Avatar
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    Talking Darn fine explanation

    But did it work....

    DARN FINE EXPLANATION

    The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.

    And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'

    And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

    And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.

    I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.

    So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments..

    Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.

    Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the expensive designer jeans that you bought a couple years back, but don't wear because you say they not the "in" name this year.

    I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.

    I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'

    The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said,

    'Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?
    "The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century

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  3. #2
    Senior Member Array Pure Kustom's Avatar
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    I bet somewhere in the world that was a true story. lol

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    VIP Member Array boricua's Avatar
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    Funny stuff, but not showing it to the wife. I got enough contusions on my cranium due to my sense of humor.
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    Senior Member Array SARR001's Avatar
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    That was great.
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    I believe every word.
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    VIP Member Array automatic slim's Avatar
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    Some of the best jokes I've ever read have been on DC, you perverts!
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    Member Array babyhulk's Avatar
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    Hhaaaaaaaaaaa!

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    Senior Member Array CCWFlaRuger's Avatar
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    Hilarious... my wife would shoot me with my own gun, but still priceless.
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    Senior Member Array Katana's Avatar
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    Ok, thats getting stolen.
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    Senior Member Array borglyn's Avatar
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    Really good!

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    VIP Member Array hogdaddy's Avatar
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    Good One
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    Member Array Shackleton's Avatar
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    I'm keeping that one!!
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    VIP Member Array ctsketch's Avatar
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    hilarious!
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  16. #15
    Ex Member Array F350's Avatar
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    My wife kinda reminds me of the answer of Dick Armey at the time of Monika Blowinski on how he would explain such a thing to his wife....

    "I wouldn't get the chance; I would be laying in a pool of my own blood with my wife standing over me asking 'how do I reload this thing?'"

    EXCEPT; my wife knows how to reload.

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