A woman, calling a local hospital, said, \"Hello, I\'d like to talk with
the person who gives the information regarding your patients. I\'d like to
find out if the patient is getting better, doing as expected, or is
getting worse\".

The voice on the other end of the line said, \"What is the patient\'s name
and room number?\"

She said, \"Sarah Finkel, in Room 302...

\"I will connect you with the nursing station.\"

\"3-A Nursing Station. How can I help You?\"

\"I would like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in Room 302\".

\"Just a moment and let me look at her records. Oh, yes. Mrs. Finkel is
doing very well. In fact, she\'s had two full meals, her blood pressure is
fine, her blood work just came back as normal, she\'s going to be taken
off the heart monitor in a couple of hours and if she continues this
improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home Tuesday at twelve
o\'clock.\"

The woman said, \"Thank God! That\'s wonderful! Oh! that\'s fantastic,
wonderful news!\"

The nurse said, \"From your enthusiasm, I take it you must be a close
family member or a very close friend!\"

\"Not exactly, I\'m Sarah Finkel in 302! Nobody around here will tell me a
damned thing!\"