What is heaven?

This is a discussion on What is heaven? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was ...

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Thread: What is heaven?

  1. #1
    Rickman
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    What is heaven?

    A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the
    scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He
    remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He
    wondered where the road was leading them.

    After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the
    road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was
    broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing
    before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like
    Mother of Pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold.
    He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a
    man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough, he called out,
    \"Excuse me, where are we?\"

    \"This is Heaven, sir,\" the man answered.

    \"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?\" the man asked.

    \"Of course, sir. Come right in, and I\'ll have some ice water brought right
    up.\" The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

    \"Can my friend,\" gesturing toward his dog, \"come in, too?\" the traveller
    asked.

    \"I\'m sorry, sir, but we don\'t accept pets.\"

    The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and
    continued the way he had been going with his dog.

    After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came
    to a dirt road which led through a farm gate that looked as if it had never
    been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man
    inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

    \"Excuse me!\" he called to the reader. \"Do you have any water?\"

    \"Yeah, sure, there\'s a pump over there, come on in.\"

    \"How about my friend here?\" the traveller gestured to the dog.

    \"There should be a bowl by the pump.\" They went through the gate, and sure
    enough, there was an old fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.

    The traveller filled the bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave
    some to the dog. When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward
    the man who was standing by the tree. \"What do you call this place?\" the
    traveller asked.

    \"This is Heaven,\" he answered.

    \"Well, that\'s confusing,\" the traveller said. \"The man down the road said
    that was Heaven, too.\"

    \"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope.
    That\'s Hell.\"

    \"Doesn\'t it make you mad for them to use your name like that?\"

    \"No, we\'re just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave
    their best friends behind.\"

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  3. #2
    Senior Member Array GoodSamaritan's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
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    I am a little late in replying to this, but that was great!

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