I can see that happening!
This is a discussion on Lawyer's ; you gotta love'em. God does!!!!! within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; This was too funny not to post! A lawyer died. At the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven ...
This was too funny not to post!
A lawyer died. At the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven at the same moment. They spend the day in orientation, and as they're getting their heavenly vestments, the Pope gets a plain white toga and wings, like everyone else, and the lawyer gets much finer apparel, made of gold thread, and Gucci shoes.
Then, they get to see where they're going to live. The Pope gets what everyone else gets, a replica of a Holiday Inn room, and the lawyer gets an 18-room mansion with servants and a swimming pool.
At dinnertime, the Pope receives the standard meal, a kosher TV dinner, but the lawyer receives a fine and tasty meal, served on silver platters.
By this time, the lawyer is beginning to suspect that an error has been made, so he asks one of the angels in charge, "Has there been some kind of mistake? This guy was the Pope, and he gets what everyone else gets, and I'm just a lawyer and I'm getting the finest of everything?"
The angel replied, "No mistake, sir. We've had lots of Popes here, but you're the first lawyer we've ever had."
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.
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I can see that happening!
You can educate ignorance, you can't fix stupid
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God and the devil are walking the fence dividing heaven and hell when they come to a very badly damaged section, they survey the damage and begin to discuss what needs to be done to repair it.
After deciding on what needs to be done God suggests they split the cost 50/50; The devil refuses and says he will pay nothing on the repairs. God insists that the costs be split evenly but the devil absolutely refuses.
God gets angry and says "I'll sue!!! I'll see you in court and we'll see who pays what".
The devil lets out a huge laugh and says "And just where do you think you're going to find a lawyer?!"