This is a discussion on Harsh Words within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; I just bought a shotgun for Home Defense and have been keeping it behind my door. I told my mom of this so she knew ...
August 3rd, 2006 11:25 PM
I just bought a shotgun for Home Defense and have been keeping it behind my door. I told my mom of this so she knew where it was when she was cleaning or if she had to use it. I'm 19 by the way.
So I was playing a videogame that had a rap soundtrack, and she comes in the doorway, and says "Jeez, with this music and that shotgun behind the door, I thought we were gonna have to talk. You aren't planning on shooting us in our sleep are you?" It wouldn't have been bad except she didn't smile or say it in a joking tone!
I had no idea what to say. She knows I have the shotgun for the defense of the family, and that there is NO WAY I would EVER do anything to harm my family. And she just automatically assumes rap is the soundtrack to homocide?
Has anyone else had something similar happen? I'm not even sure what to do or say about it. Any advice is welcome. Thanks.
"It is your evil that will be sought by us. With every breath we will hunt them down. Each day we will spill their blood, until it rains down from the skies. Do not kill. Do not rape. Do not steal. These are principles that every man from every faith can embrace." -McManus twins Boondock Saints
August 3rd, 2006 11:28 PM
That is a bummer no cant say i ever had that problem counting dad bought me my first shottie when i was 8
What video game ??
August 3rd, 2006 11:37 PM
Sorry to hear that...sounds like Mom might be watching a little too much of the nightly TV news
I don't really have any advice for you, either...like Bud, I was raised in a "firearm friendly" environment. I've never had to confront something like this
"I surrounded 'em"- Alvin York
"They're ain't many troubles that a man can't fix with seven hundred dollars and a thirty ought six"- Jeff Cooper
August 3rd, 2006 11:40 PM
Maybe you should show your mom this thread. She should know what you think, and how what she said affected you. Hang in there; if you ever do have to defend your family, do it well, and protect them at all costs.
August 3rd, 2006 11:42 PM
I can - well, sorta, see where she is coming from.
I am an old phart and have zero liking for rap and what it (sometimes) seems to relate to. That said - I would hope your Mom can feel she trusts you - and yet this almost suggests otherwise.
I see a need here for a heart to heart talk - to reassure her that your music taste bears no relation to your ability to be a responsible gun owner - explain to her until she understands and answer her questions too - in effect, clear the air.
Chris - P95
NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.
"To own a gun and assume that you are armed
is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."
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August 3rd, 2006 11:43 PM
can't say, my folks raised me in a gun friendly environment too.
"In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock." Thomas Jefferson
Nemo Me Impune Lacesset
August 4th, 2006 12:32 AM
This may come off as sounding trite , but try and spend a bit of time with your mom and dad , i know it isnt fun .. but do it , help out with somethng she/he cares about and visit , yall dont have a lot in common right now and have kinda grown apart , soon enough you will be on the other side of the parent/kid issue and will be wishing to bridge the gap , and still have no idea how to do it . I do commend you for both realising that there is an issue , and being mature enough to bring it up here .. KUDOS
Make sure you get full value out of today , Do something worthwhile, because what you do today will cost you one day off the rest of your life .
We only begin to understand folks after we stop and think .
Criminals are looking for victims, not opponents.
August 4th, 2006 12:40 AM
P95 is right, having a serious, adult talk with her will definitely be in your favor. Dont forget to mention that there is no correlation between the music you listen to, and the gun you have. Assure her you are a responsible gun owner and plan to defend your family should the situation arise. Communicating with her before her questions turn into uneasy feelings of your intentions is going to be key. "Clear the air"
Unified Sportsmen of Florida Member
August 4th, 2006 03:32 PM
rap music associated with murder?
say it ain't so.
that is like saying "bow chicka bow bow" is not associated with porno movies.
pimpin' ain't eazee, yo.
August 4th, 2006 04:48 PM
I recommend that you find a way of securing that shotgun. You wouldn't want the neighbor's kid to accidentally find it.
August 4th, 2006 04:50 PM
Been there, bud.
Hey 45. My mom is very similar. I'm 25 and I still hear "Why do you need a gun? Are you sure you aren't going to shoot someone? You're going to kill a friend." blah blah My mom has a lot of trust issues - esp. after her and my father divorced. It's only gotten worse and her fear of guns and those that carry has just hit rock bottom. I was actually talking about my gun today in the car with her and my uncle and my mom looked so scared. She is one of those people that only trusts a gun when its in her hands.
She grew up on a farm shootin her daddy's .45 and his old shottie. Both my parents grew up with guns but my home growing up was non-gun. My dad has always liked shooting but never really owned a gun (he has a .22 that hasn't been shot or cleaned in over 40 years. No $%!@ it says "Sears, Roebuck & Co. C1947") worth shooting. Or, that he considered worth shooting.
Even with an environment like that, my mother and I had to come to an "agree to disagree" point. This was probably made worse by the fact that our divide during my teenage years was QUITE large. I would suggest attempting to bridge this. Take her shooting!!! Make a game out of it! Tell her that you'll buy her dinner if she can shoot more clays than you can! Then maybe let her win! Your mom, unless theres something else here, will drop anything to spend some time with her kid. Even if it she's anti and it means a little gun play, the dinner will probably be worth it to her. While you're out at dinner talk about stuff other than rap or things she sees as negative, just keep things positive. I know it can be rough, but you're doin yourself a favor too by avoiding further confrontations with this little "check-up."
I have actually done this. It worked AMAZINGLY well. I told my friends that I hadn't gone out with the gang the night before and why. A few were "God thats so stupid" but they were drowned out with the "Thats AWESOME!!!! I wish my parents would take me shooting/go shooting with me."
Besides - chicks dig guys who can spend a good time with their moms.
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ITFT / Quick Kill Review
"It is enough to note, as we have observed, that the American people have considered the handgun to be the quintessential self-defense weapon." - Justice Scalia, SCOTUS - DC v Heller - 26 JUN 2008
August 5th, 2006 06:46 PM
This is based on my experiences with my mother, and I am not attempting to project her actions onto your mother. If my mom said that, it would be a manipulative attempt to guilt me into shutting off the music and putting the firearm away. Just another possibility as to why she said what she said the way she said it.
August 5th, 2006 07:23 PM
It sounds like she's not as comfortable with the shotgun as you thought. You might consider putting it in a better place, maybe in the corner of the closet. Out of sight, out of mind, but about as accessible as behind the door.
short wait times. Use 'defensivecarry' as a coupon code for a discount to your order.
August 5th, 2006 09:00 PM
A gun no more likely give you criminal intentions than watching soap's is to make you a doctor or an Some Lousy Uttering Trolup.
Went through something similar when I was 19 with a motorcycle so...Ask her if she loves you, (you already know the answer) but make her say it, then ask her if she trust you, again make her say it, then say Well I love and trust you too, give her a hug and say that is why I want to protect you and Dad.
"The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century
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